Ranchan and Ucchan
by SOTG
Summary: Ranma and Ukyou are married. A honeymoon in China and typical Saotome chaos following them, they learn the hard way how marriage is more than it looks. It's harder when you're not staying the same gender... Chapter 25 up. At last.
1. Marriage has so many interruptions

Ranma ½ is © Respective owners. No infringement in Copyright is intended. Story below and in subsequent chapters is © Scourgeofthegalaxy

The Okonomiyaki cart rolled down the road, pulled by an old man in a white Gi with glasses and a bandanna over his obviously bald head. On the roof was a small boy with his hair tied up in a ponytail, no older than six years old, who was waving at a small figure running down the road after them. As the cart went past a crowd, they heard the small boy shouting "Goodbye, Ucchan! I'll miss you!" When the small figure ran past, they saw it was a little girl, the same age as the boy, running for all she was worth with a small spatula in her hand. "You jerk! You were supposed to take me with you!" The crowd facefaulted.

The boy turned around to his father. "Daddy, what does Ucchan mean we were meant to take her with us?"

The father stopped pulling the cart. "Uhh….." He wanted to run off with the cart, like he was, in his mind at least, entitled to. He accepted the dowry, and just never bothered mentioning the fact that he had gotten his son into another arranged marriage.

"Were we supposed to take Ucchan with us? Is that why you were talking to Ucchan's dad?" the boy asked again, getting a curious look in his eye.

The father sighed… There was no point in denying it. He had nearly tainted his honour yet again. He had to stop doing this. "Yes, Ranma. We're taking Ukyou with us."

Ranma's eyes lit up. He was going to be travelling with his best friend ever!! Ranma jumped down off the roof of the cart and ran to his friend. "Ucchan! Ucchan! Guess what! You're coming with us!"

Upon hearing Ranma shout those words, Genma felt dread. How was he going to raise his son to be a Man Amongst Men if there was going to be a girl tagging along? He sighed. Well, Genma thought, I suppose I'm going to have to work this out as it comes. He turned round and looked at his son and future daughter-in-law hug each other.

Ukyou was coming with them.

10 years later

"I now pronounce you Husband and Wife!"

Ranma nearly collapsed at them words. He was married! And to the one person in the world he could trust no less! He and Ukyou were going to live happily ever after! Who cares if it was in a small registry office in the Kita ward of Tokyo? Nothing could possibly spoil the newlywed couple's mood. What could possibly go wrong?

It was then that Genma walked into the room, tears in his eyes. "Son… You've made an old man very proud!"

"Ah, it was nothin' Pop." Ranma replied, a large smile on his face. Genma had said that he'd arrange their honeymoon, a set of springs in china. Jusenkyo, he said their name was. Sure, his pop was always trying to make him go to weird training grounds in other parts of the country, but he trusted his father that he wouldn't make him fight anybody on his honeymoon.

How wrong he was.

Ranma looked at his newlywed wife. She was beautiful! Ranma Saotome was the happiest man on the planet, and he would share that happiness with his new wife, Ukyou Saotome. Gone was the Kuonji name that Ukyou despised for so many reasons. One of those reasons that she had told Ranma was that her father had traced her and was trying to make her break off her engagement to Ranma, claiming that Ranma had another fiancée, which was total rubbish. Ranma had never been away for more than a day, not nearly long enough to build a relationship with anyone. No, Ukyou was Ranma's wife, and only wife. And that was it.

Ukyou looked at her husband and couldn't help but feel proud of the one man she loved. If there was anyone out there that also claimed to be his wife, as her father had said, she'd cut them down faster than they could run. How dare her father try to make her leave her beloved, based on some pitiful lie that he made no doubt to try and get her to marry somebody more 'worthy' of her. Ukyou's father was in hospital for a month after saying that. No, Ranma was her husband, and that was that.

Genma looked at his son and daughter-in-law. Oh, how he was happy. He couldn't have asked for a better family. And now he was going to provide an all-expenses-paid trip to some natural springs in China. He was a good father. He'd been assured by the local guide they were welcome to visit, but then he started rambling on about the history of the site. Genma thanked him for the information and hung up after that, not taking note of anything the guide said. They would be leaving today. Genma had already booked the tickets and had asked for two seats together and another single seat behind or in front. He intended for the happy couple to be as happy as possible together.

China

Jusenkyo, The Land Of Cursed Springs.

Ranma, Ukyou and Genma arrived at the 'honeymoon' with a little less enthusiasm as they might have expected of themselves. None of them were expecting the airport to be _that_ far away. However, they were here, and it was not what they were expecting.

Pools further than the eye could see were stretching into the distance, bamboo poles sticking out of them. Fog gave the landscape a well deserving eerie feel. The only sign that there was anybody living nearby was a small hut over to the right of the pools, a small chimney emitting smoke. The party walked to the hut and knocked, to have the door opened by a small dumpy, looking man with a pipe. He took a moment to look at their faces and realised that they must be visitors.

"Aiya! Visitors!"

The trio facefaulted. They all thought that this was a well-known set of springs, with accommodation. Genma took charge.

"Hello," he said, bowing. Ranma and Ukyou followed suit. "We're here for the springs. You said that we could use them?"

The guide looked at them in surprise. "You wish use springs?" he said in badly joined Japanese.

The married couple nodded. "We're here for our honeymoon. My father said he booked us a place here." Ranma said, indicating Genma as his father.

"Visitors welcome use springs, but there things you must know." The three visitors to the Chinese man's home perked their ears up. "These training grounds, cu—"

"TRAINING GROUNDS!?" Ranma shouted. He grabbed his father, and raised him off the ground. "Pop, I know you've done some stupid things before, but this is the one that tops it! You bought me and Ucchan here for our honeymoon to TRAIN!?"

Genma formed a sweatdrop behind his head. "But I thought this was a perfect honeymoon spot!" Genma argued. "I didn't know they were tra—" Ranma interrupted him.

"YOU BOUGHT ME AND UKYOU TO SOME TRAINING GROUNDS TO CELEBRATE OUR GETTING MARRIED!?" he shouted, forming an aura of Ki around himself.

"How dare you think that I and Ran-Chan would want to fight on our honeymoon! Ukyou shouted.

Ranma and Ukyou had both received training in the school of Anything Goes Martial Arts by Genma since they were six. Both were accomplished martial artists and had their own unique style. Ranma, with his ability to manipulate Ki easily, had some unique Ki abilities, whereas Ukyou, being an Okonomiyaki chef since long before she could remember, had based her fighting around that. They both had picked up attacks from each other, so both knew how to blast a Ki bolt and wield weaponry. (Ukyou's favoured weapon was a giant spatula she kept strapped to her back) Both were easily capable of dealing with people that came their way, either trying to reclaim money that Genma had never payed, or simply to have a crack at two martial artists.

Genma was shocked. He had tried to bring his son up to respect his elders. He wasn't very good at it, but this was the worst he'd ever been. And for Ukyou to join in like that… She was normally a very sensible girl that kept quiet when she didn't need to say anything. Now she was having a stab at Genma for his honest mistake! He had honestly thought these were some natural springs were people could come and relax. That they were training grounds surprised him, but looking at them now, it made sense. The bamboo poles were obviously meant for standing and hopping between, whereas punishment for losing would be to get soaked in the pools below.

With that, Genma came to a decision. He leaped upon the nearest pole, and shouted at the couple below. "If you want to have a go at me for making a mistake, then follow me!"

Ranma instantly leapt upon the nearest pole and leapt after Genma. Ukyou followed suit.

The guide simply sat down on a stool, lit his pipe and sighed. It was going to happen again.

Ranma fired a blast of Ki at his father, but missed. He needed to focus on his accuracy, but wasn't used to it. He normally just blasted anyone that got near him, but projectile shooting a moving target was hard. Ukyou landed on a pole next to him and threw several mini-spatulas at Genma, all of which missed. However, they didn't miss the pole he was standing on.

Genma fell into the pool below, and didn't surface for another two minutes. Ranma and Ukyou started getting worried. Surely a small pool of water hadn't defeated Genma… Had it? They were about to go over and check when they saw a dark shape move underneath the water's surface and braced themselves for Genma's attack that was bound to come.

What the married couple didn't count on was a large, angry looking panda jump out and knocked the couple into different pools each.

Ranma went headfirst into the water, and suddenly wanted to cry out in agony. There was pain! There was pain here unlike anything Ranma had ever felt before! He felt like his body was melting, and reforming itself. Trust Pop to bring us to springs full of acid, Ranma thought. Suddenly, he felt fresh air blow over his face and gasped a deep breath. The water he had nearly swallowed sprayed out of his mouth and nose and landed back in the water. Ranma opened his eyes and winced, the fresh air stinging them. However, Ranma noticed something not quite right with his body….

Ukyou went headfirst into the water. When she landed in it, a strange buzzing went around her, and Ukyou then nearly cried out in pain. A single, sharp stab of what felt like a white-hot knife plunged through her, so hard that she didn't notice the feel of her skin and bones changing. When she felt her head arrive above water, she coughed up water that nearly went into her lungs. It was then that she opened her eyes and saw…

Ranma looked over in the direction he saw his wife get knocked over to, when all he saw was…

A red haired girl…

A brown haired boy…

Ranma jumped out of the pool and ran to the pool with the strange boy. "Are you all right?" Ranma asked, and then froze. Something was wrong with his voice. Never mind, Ranma thought. There are more important matters going on.

Ukyou looked up at the strange red-haired girl and tried to work out why she looked so familiar. "Are you all right?" the girl asked.

Ukyou nodded her head. "Yes, thank you." She replied. And then froze. Her voice was…different, somehow. Ukyou climbed out of the pool and stood up, noticing her perspective on the world was slightly altered. Ukyou couldn't explain it, but wasn't worried right now. She needed to find Ranma. See if he was alright.

Ranma looked at the brown-haired boy. He had eerily familiar eyes. Piercing green eyes that seemed to look right into you. They reminded Ranma of Ukyou as Ukyou had the exact same eyes. Except Ukyou was a girl, and the person in front of him…wasn't.

Ukyou looked into the eyes of the girl in front of her. They were an icy blue, that seemed as clear as day. They were spookily familiar to Ukyou, in that they reminded her of Ranma. Bizarre, she thought.

Ranma decided he ought to ask the boy's name. "Sorry, I haven't introduced myself yet. My name's Ranma Saotome. Who would you be?"

Ukyou looked at the girl in shock. Had the redhead really just said she was called Ranma Saotome? "Uhh.. My name is Ukyou Saotome…"

Ranma looked at the boy in complete disbelief. This boy was claiming to be his wife!

"You cannot be Ukyou Saotome! Ukyou is my wife!"

"I was going to say the same to you!" Ukyou replied. "Ranma Saotome is my husband, and you're clearly not my husband!"

Ranma was taken aback at that. "And why am I not your husband?" Even though I am not married to you, he thought.

"You're a girl!!" Ukyou shouted.

"What!? That's preposterous!!" Ranma shouted back.

"Oh?" Ukyou said. "And what are these, then?" Ukyou reached towards the girls chest, 'Ranma' following the motion of her hand with her eyes. Right up until Ukyou placed a hand on a piece of clothing that was sticking out…and squeezed slightly.

Ranma followed the hand. And stared when he saw where it was headed. When the hand squeezed, Ranma felt it. He felt it even though he knew that he shouldn't be feeling that. How could he feel it!?

"Oh, Kami-Sama…." Ranma whispered. Ranma practically ripped of his shirt only to find…he wasn't a he. Sitting underneath the shirt was a pair of breasts, poking forward proudly, as if to say "Yep! We're breasts! And we're attached to a woman!"

Ukyou paled at the sight of 'Ranma's face. It was pure fear, there. Pure, unadulterated fear. It was then that she noticed that a part of her anatomy was different. She looked down and was shocked to see…nothing. Where were her breasts? What happened to them? And why were her pants rather tight?

Ranma looked at the boy in front of hi— her. He was looking down at his chest in complete fear, and was mumbling something about "where did they go… Where did they go!?" It was only then Ranma realised that the boy in front of her was wearing the exact same clothes as Ukyou was earlier. "U-Ucchan?"

Ukyou looked up to the sound of her being called by Ranma's pet-name. It was then sh—He realised that Ranma's clothes were the exact same ones as the girl in front of her. "Ra- Ran-Chan?"

Ranma stared. The boy had said Ucchan's pet name for hi- her. That left no doubt. The person in front of her had to be her wife. Ranma collapsed into unconsciousness.

Ukyou stared at the girl who was clearly supposed to be her husband. She kept staring when the redhead's rolled into the back of her head and collapsed into a heap. Ukyou decided to take action, and picked the girl up, not bothered about the still-exposed breasts. Sh- He walked to the cabin where that panda and the guide sat, the panda holding a kettle.

Ukyou stopped in front of the guide, put the redhead down and covered the breasts. There ought to be some level of dignity maintained.

The guide looked at them carefully. "Hmm…" he muttered. "You seem to have fallen in spring of drowned boy, Nannichuan. Your friend fell in Nyannichuan, spring of drowned girl. Both tragic stories of boy and girl falling in springs and drowning many years ago. Whoever fall in springs now looks like boy or girl. Eyes always remain same, though." The guide had a puff on his pipe before continuing. "Have hot water. It make you normal again."

Ukyou-kun grabbed the kettle off the stove and wondered what he was meant to do with it. It was only when the guide indicated that he ought to pour it over himself. Ukyou-kun did so and became Ukyou-chan. Thank Kami-Sama, she prayed in her head.

Ukyou now did the same to Ranma-chan, bringing him out of his unconsciousness. A now very male Ranma now stood up.

"Man, I had the weirdest dream. I dreamt that I was a girl and you were a boy, Ucchan." Ranma said, clearly believing the whole thing never happened.

The panda then poured some hot water over itself, and turned back into Genma. "I'm afraid, boy, that it wasn't a dream." With those words, Genma threw a bucket of cold water over Ranma and Ukyou. "Hot water will turn you back, but only until you get splashed with cold water again.

Ranma-chan looked down at herself. "Aw, man. That just sucks. How am I going to be a man amongst men now?"

Ukyou-kun was slightly more concerned about something else. "Baka! How can we be husband and wife if the husband is female and vice versa!!"

Ranma-chan stared at Ukyou-kun. He was right. This put their marriage in jeopardy. She would not have that. They would head back to Japan and find a cure, as soon as possible. They needed to leave this place as soon as possible, or risk getting cursed again.

"We're leaving." said Genma. "This land is cursed, and if we stay around, we risk getting cursed again. We're heading back to the airport, and back to Japan. I've just remembered that I've got an old friend living in the Nerima Ward that I wouldn't mind visiting, anyway."

Ranma-chan and Ukyou-kun nodded. They would have a honeymoon in Japan, where everything was sane. Not like crazy Chinese springs that made you an aquatransexual. They needed to get away.

As the three foreigners left, the Guide looked at the pools. Again, newly-cursed victims had not considered the idea of dunking themselves in the pools that corresponded to their natural forms. The Guide sighed. It must be part of the magic of this land, I guess. To stop the victims from curing themselves immediately would be an extreme amount of magic, and for it to seemingly affect himself as well, it was phenomenal. The Guide always wondered why he didn't suggest to victims that they dunk themselves… Ah, well. It was too late, anyway. They would learn to deal with it, as would all the others. The Guide turned back into his hut and went on with his life.

Furinkan, Nerima Ward

Tokyo, Japan.

It was raining. It had been raining all day, and the only thing that made it barely acceptable was that it was the middle of summer. The water falling freshened everything up, drowning the muggy air and refreshing the citizens of Nerima.

A panda walked round a corner flanked by a boy and a girl. The boy was rather tall, with brown hair flowing down his back, tied into a ponytail. His eyes were a piercing green that seemed to ask you if you were feeling lucky, punk. He wore a bandoleer of spatulas around his torso and a giant spatula strapped to his back. He also wore a small utility belt with a set of kitchen utensils attached at various points, as well as a flask of water. He glanced quickly at his friend, a small redhaired girl. The hair was tied back in a pigtail running down just past her shoulders. She wore a plain red Chinese shirt with black tongs, with a spork attached to her back. There were no bandoleers or utility belts on the small redhead, but the spork was seemingly large enough on her to do enough damage.

The panda in between them towered over the duo, and was writing on a sign. Holding it up, the two humans read the sign. [Turn left here.]

They turned the corner and saw a large house a little way down the road. The sign hanging next to the gate was a traditional wooden one. The three travellers stopped in front of it.

"Tendo Dojo of Anything Goes Martial Arts…" Ranma-chan read. Pop, you never mentioned your friend also taught Anything Goes.

Genma-Panda held up another sign: [Me and Tendo trained together, and we decided that to unite our families, we would have our children marry.]

Ranma-chan finished reading the sign. And blew up. She glowed an intense blue and formed a ball of energy between her hands. Aiming her hands in front of her, she shouted. "ANTI-PANDA STRIKE!"

Genma-panda flew across the street, a burn mark in the middle of his chest. He held up another sign. [What was that for!?]

"You promised somebody that I would marry their daughter! Don't you think that this was a bad idea considering that Ucchan and I are MARRIED!?"

Ukyo-kun stood exactly where he was. He was planning his method of execution. The stupid fool had done it again! As well as getting the three of them cursed, he had promised somebody that he would have his family joined to another. This was too far. The man would die.

Ukyou-kun never got the chance to act, as the gates behind him suddenly flew open. Thrown off his feet, Ukyou-kun landed flat on his face and never saw the chaos that ensued.

A man in a grey Gi sprinted out of the gates and promptly placed himself between the glowing girl and the burnt panda. "Stop! Who are you to attack wild pandas!?" he shouted. He never got an answer as he was hit round the back of the head by a sign. [WHO ARE YOU CALLING A PANDA!?]

Ukyou-kun pushed himself up. It had stopped raining. It was time to get everyone back into their normal forms. He pulled a portable griddle and a pot out of nowhere, and poured the water into the pot. Letting it heat up, he looked at the carnage in front of him. The man who had knocked her flying was now on his back, first and little fingers sticking out with his thumbs whilst the middle two were planted deep in his palms. Checking the water, he decided it was warm enough. He poured it into three beakers and poured one over himself, turning himself back into a female. She walked over to Ranma-Chan and poured it over the redhead, returning her husband to his real form. She then threw the last beaker at the panda standing over the grey-Gi man. Genma returned to his human form, and then turned over the man in front of him. And nearly fainted. The man had a moustache, was tall and had red eyes from seemingly constant crying. Genma collapsed to his knees, and muttered something.

"What was that, pop?" Ranma asked.

"It's… my friend that we came to meet…" Genma stammered. "Soun Tendo…"

"This is the man who you decided with to engage me to his daughters!?" Ranma screamed.

"Yes… Yes, it is."

Ranma sighed. This would be a bad first impression indeed. Picking up the grey-Gi'd man, or Soun Tendo, as he was called, Ranma slung him over his shoulder and walked into the property. Stepping up to the front gate, Ranma knocked on the door.

As the door opened, a young woman, no older than twenty years, stood and took in the scene. Suddenly, she realised that the youth in front of her was carrying her father.

"Father!" she exclaimed.

Suddenly, the noise of running came from inside, and two other girls ran out. "Daddy!" they chimed in unison. One had long bluish-black hair that looked like it had been dyed and then re-dyed. It flowed past her shoulders and was well-looked after. Her face was, at the moment, looking on in terror. But behind that, Ranma could see a cute little face that hid many secrets. She looked no older than sixteen years. The other was slightly taller than the long-haired girl, and had short cropped hair that indicated she knew what she was doing. It also shone in places that seemed to catch your eye. Her face was completely different, though. Her eyes were a cold, dull grey, Even though she was clearly anxious, she still somehow managed to keep a straight face…

Ranma sweatdropped. This couldn't be good.

Suddenly, the youngest of the girls came forward. "Who are you and what have you done with Daddy!?" she shouted.

"Akane, please!" the girl who answered the door said. "The man is a guest, you mustn't be this way in front of guests."

"Kasumi, he's clearly beaten up our dad!" the girl called Akane replied. "How can you have respect for somebody that attacks people for no reason?"

"From what I've heard, I have every reason…" Ranma muttered under his breath.

"What was that?" Akane asked, eyes narrowing as if to try and stare Ranma out.

"Nothin'," Ranma replied quickly. "Look, I'm sorry about this. I can get my companions to help explain."

"Well," said Akane. "It better be good. I don't go easy on people who attack my family."

Nodding, Ranma put the head of the Tendo clan on the ground gently, and then went back to the gate.

He called to Ukyou and "Fur brain" to come into the house, saying they were going to be doing some explaining.

Ukyou sighed. There had been too many interruptions in her marriage, and it hadn't even been a month.

:::::::::::::::::::

"So…" said Soun Tendo. "You turn into a girl, you into a boy and you, old friend, into a panda, when splashed with cold water. Correct?"

The three travellers nodded.

"Bizarre." Soun said.

"Tendo, I must press forward with my reason for visiting." Genma said, earning him an evil glare from his son.

"And what would that be, Saotome?" asked Soun.

"Do you remember our agreement, involving…" He made some thinly disguised hand movements, that clearly indicated his son and the three girls of the house. They had been introduced as Kasumi, 19 years old, Nabiki, 17 years old and Akane, 16 years old. They had also given a little information about each other. Kasumi had taken over the household chores since their mother had died many years ago, Nabiki was a ruthless moneymaking machine and would sell you for a couple hundred yen, and Akane was a martial artist in training, who was confident in her abilities. The last introduction had caught Ranma and Ukyou's attention, and both were evaluating her bit by bit.

"Ah, yes! I do remember." Soun said proudly. "And I believe that we ought to get things out of the way." Soun stood up and cleared his throat.

"Daughters, this is my dear friend Genma Saotome. Many years ago we trained together, and we both decided towards the end of our training that the Saotome-Tendo schools of Anything Goes martial Arts should be continued. We both decided that the best way to ensure this is to marry our families together."

The last sentence had caused many shouts of complaint from the Tendo girls.

Soun silenced them with a hand gesture. "We agreed this on the night that Kasumi was born, and we agreed that when Saotome had his first boy, they would get married later in life. As it happens, I had three more children." Soun said the last sentence for Genma's benefit, but he was clearly enjoying himself, working himself up for what he was about to say.

"Ranma, I want you to choose any of my girls to be your fiancée. I'm sure that _none _of them will have _any_ problems with this." Soun said, placing a certain amount of emphasis on certain words, aiming his look at the middle Tendo daughter.

Genma was practically vibrating with nervous excitement. "Well, Ranma, who do you want?"

Ranma looked at the three girls, then at the fathers, and then at Ukyou. Kasumi was calm-faced, Akane was looking rather angry at the whole situation, and Nabiki was…Nabiki. Soun was beaming at him proudly, and Genma was smiling his face off. Lastly, Ukyou was looking at him, with worried eyes. Ranma snorted.

"What is it, son?" Genma said.

"You are an idiot." Ranma said bluntly to his father. "I noticed that you neglected to mention one very important fact."

"What's that?" Genma said. From the blank look on his face that he clearly had no idea what Ranma was on about.

"How about the fact that me and Ukyou are married?" Ranma replied coolly.

Genma froze.

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS!?" Soun shouted, his head now a massive demon head with forked tongue and horns.

"HE'S…HE'S LYING!!" Genma shouted, gaining him a hit on the head with a ginat spatula and a giant spork.

"What the HELL are you on about, Old Man!?" Ranma shouted.

"Who do you think you are if you think you can call our marriage a lie!?"

"YOU WERE MY BEST MAN!"

"SA-O-TO-ME!!!!" Soun thundered. "IS THIS TRUE!?"

"YES! I MEAN NO! I MEAN…"

Ranma hit his father over the head with the rounded side of his giant spork. "Shut up, Pop." He said. Ranma then turned to Ukyou. "Ucchan, when did we meet?"

"Ten years ago, why?" Ukyou asked.

Ranma waved the question away. "What did our fathers say after three months of us knowing each other?"

"That we ought to get married to each other in the future." Said Ukyou, catching on.

"What was the dowry between our families?"

"The only form of our families income, our Okonomiyaki cart."

"What stupid thing did my pop do after three weeks of having to drag it around?"

"Sell it for food money, not realising I knew how to use the equipment on the cart to make Okonomiyaki. He would have spent less money on ingredients."

"Mr. Tendo, This is proof that me and Ukyou are married. It also proves my father is an idiot and was probably drunk when you two had the idea."

The two fathers blushed.

Ranma sighed. He stood up and bowed towards the three Tendo girls. Ukyou did the same. "Our apologies for barging in this evening. We hope you can forgive us." Ranma said. He then threw his father out into the yard and fired a ball of glowing energy at him, knocking the man unconscious. "We'll be leaving now." He said to the family.

With that, he and Ukyou walked into the garden, picked Genma's feet up and dragged him along the ground and out of the property, hand in hand.

"Well," said Soun. "That was interesting." Then he remembered that his friend had betrayed him. "Ohhh, my poor girls! They're never going to get married!"

The Tendo girls facefaulted, then went to help their father before he flooded the house.

:::::::::::::::::::

Ranma and Ukyou walked through the town of Furinkan, noting that there was a school and a fairly busy town centre. It was night now, and the artificial glow of the street lamps made everything seem abandoned.

Ukyou then noticed an empty shopfront, placed in prime view of the shoppers that would walk around during the day. Suddenly, several thoughts ran through her mind.

"Fancy staying here for a while, Ran-Chan?" Ukyou said to her husband.

"I wouldn't mind, it seems a nice place. But where would we stay?"

Ukyou pointed to the storefront and the three bedroomed flat above it. "We could buy that store space and set up an Okonomiyaki restaurant. The money would pay for that flat above it and we could still have some left over." She smiled. "It'd be good! We'd make a positive impression on the locals, have a place to sleep and be able to go to school!"

Ranma smiled. He liked the idea. "We'll sort all that out tomorrow. For now, let's book into a hotel."

Ukyou frowned. "With what money?"

"I have some in case of emergency on me at all times." Ranma said. "It's enough to pay for two rooms, or one double room."

"But what about Pop?" Ukyou asked.

"HAH!" Ranma laughed. "Do you think he deserves a bed to sleep in tonight after what he tried to do?"

Ukyou laughed and smiled. "Even so, nobody deserves to be left outside on their own." She thought quickly, and came upon a solution. "Let him earn his room. He can do the hotels dishes. And we can make sure he doesn't get a room anywhere near us."

Ranma smiled. He liked that plan. "And sometimes I forget how I fell in love with you." Ranma laughed.

Ukyou smiled and kissed her partner. "It's because I'm so devilishly clever and beautiful." She said.

"And you cook like a dream, let's not forget that." Said Ranma.

Ukyou laughed. "Yes, let's not forget that either, Mr. Bottomless-Stomach." She said, poking him in the belly.

Ranma laughed and walked into the hotel with his wife.

Notes: The first in this series that will have god-knows-how-many chapters. I might make the next chapters shorter, though.

Please point out any errors in the plot and so on. I'll be happy to fix them. ^_^


	2. Furinkan's new resident's settle in

The next day, Ranma and Ukyou signed out of the hotel. They had opted for a double room, sharing a bed – They were married, after all. Genma eventually got a room after he cleaned the dishes, cutlery, pots and pans, emptied the waste and acted as a bouncer for all of five minutes before he stole food from the bar.

When Genma got into his bed, he noted that Ranma and Ukyou were on the other side of the hotel. _Ah, well_, thought Genma. _I'll see them over breakfast. And I'll give Ranma some slack in his morning workout tomorrow as well. I'll only steal food from his plate._

::::::::::

"Get out! Your works been done for you!"

Shampoo silently fumed. She had moved to Japan for the fantastic job opportunities, not to be chucked out onto the street! It wasn't fair! She had done the dishes and all the other chores for over four months now, and they still wouldn't give her a free night.

"You big stupid Japanese man!" Shampoo shouted. "You no care about Shampoo! Shampoo hungry and tired!"

The door she was thrown out of closed. It didn't open for the rest of the night. Shampoo sighed inwards. It was going to be a cold night.

::::::::::

It had been raining since the morning, and none of the travellers had umbrellas. Genma had been told to wait in the park, whilst Ranma-chan and Ukyou-kun went to the offices. Upon entering the offices, both headed for the restrooms. Ukyou-kun went in the girls, and Ranma-chan vice-versa. Ukyou had a bottle attached to her utility belt, and Ranma, with his ability to manipulate Ki easily, took a plastic cup from the water machine in. Heating the water without melting the plastic, Ranma-chan dumped the contents over herself, turning her back into a him. Ukyou, however had gone into a cubicle first. As a man, her belt was too loose, and when she changed, the belt went slack. And so did any items of clothing that were attached.

As Ranma and Akane came out of the restrooms, Ranma was drying his hair with a paper towel, whilst Ukyou was adjusting her belt. Seeing each other, they walked to the nearest seats and sat down next to each other, waiting for their number to be called.

Ukyou looked at the ticket she had received from the machine on the wall.

"Forty-eight." She said, commiting the number to memory. "Remember that, Ran-chan."

"Huh?" said Ranma stupidly. It had been a whole hour and a half since he had last eaten, and Ranma's stomach was demanding topping up.

Ranma patted the growling creature in his gut, muttering something that sounded almost like soothing words. Ukyou rolled her eyes.

"Forty-four!" said an electronic voice. The number flashed up on a screen and the people with that ticket made their way to the indicated counter.

"Only four numbers left now." Said Ranma. "Can't be that long."

"Baka!" Ukyou said harshly. "You just jinxed it!"

Ranma eep'd.

* * *

1 hour and 30 minutes later

* * *

"Forty-seven!"

Ranma had fallen asleep and had a line of drool creeping it's way out of his mouth. Ukyou had resorted to waiting outside in the fresh air, standing underneath a canopy to avoid the water. Suddenly, she heard the magic number.

"Forty-Eight!"

Ukyou ran inside to see some technicians jabbing at the electronic sign with screwdrivers, making it show all sorts of stupid things that had been pre-loaded into it. It was also calling out random numbers.

"Three-Hundred and Sixty-Five!" it shouted before showing a picture of the Earth rotating.

"Ugh," said a techy. It's going to start shouting out stats now.

"Fifty-Two!" A picture of a calendar with flipping pages was shown.

Ukyou balked.

Twenty minutes later, a person was standing in front of the sign – which mercifully had been turned off – and was waiting to call out a number when given a signal. He didn't know what the signal was going to be, yet. He soon found out.

"Ack!" he yelped, jumping three feet into the air. "Forty-Eight!"

Ranma woke up at that, and wiped the drool off of his mouth with his sleeve. He held Ukyou's hand as they walked to the counter.

As they walked past the number-caller, they noticed some of his hairs were standing on end. The man turned to a supervisor on the floor. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M BEING BUZZED!!?"

Ranma and Ukyou sat in the chairs on the other side of the counter, and looked at the man in front of them. He was small, middle-aged and balding with wiry glasses that were too big for his face. The little plate on his lapel said 'Yoshitaka'

Mr. Yoshitaka smiled at them. "Sir, Madam, How may I help you?"

Ukyou got straight to business, and went straight into what they wanted.

"We're new in town, and we need a place to stay. Walking around, we noticed that there's an empty piece of shop space in the Nerima Town Centre. I'm a chef and I'd like to use that shop space to sell Okonomiyaki and pay rent or mortgage on the flat above."

"Well," said Yoshitaka, "the flat and the shop you refer to are together. Access can be from the street and in the storage room at the back of the shop."

::::::::::

Two hours later, Ranma and Ukyou left the offices with keys and legal papers. They headed straight to the shop, and opened it up, getting a feel for the place. Ukyou immediately started devising floor plans in her mind. Ranma went upstairs to check out the accommodation.

"Ukyou!" he shouted from upstairs. "Ukyou, the flat came with everything we need! Beds, sofas, cookers and everything! It's perfect!"

Ukyou smiled.

::::::::::

Genma sat in the park in Panda form, unable to change because of the rain. How long were they going to take…?

The next day, Ranma, Ukyou and Genma (who they recovered from the park after nightfall) headed towards the school. Genma only came along because he was the legal guardian of the pair. They went to the offices at the reception and got Ranma and Ukyou into the year that suited their ages. Unfortunately, that meant being in the same class as Akane.

They joined the class the same day, minus standard uniforms. Ranma and Ukyou were minus their battle utensils, so there was no giant Spatula and Spork, but Ukyou kept her shuriken spatulas on her utility belt. She felt better knowing she had some form of defence on her.

The Sense stood at the front of the class, and called for silence.

"Student's, these are two new students who will be starting today. I know they're not in uniform, but they've assured me that they will be tomorrow. They also requested that they introduce themselves, as they have some important things to say.

Ranma stepped forward and bowed politely. "My name is Ranma Saotome, and this is my wife, Ukyou Saotome." Ukyou bowed as well.

The class were silent. A married couple? In school? What was going on?

"We're both martial artists and were trained by my father for ten years." Ranma continued. "During this time, we have learnt many techniques which help us defend ourselves and the people around us, which brings us onto our next point."

"Me and Ranma recently travelled to China for our honeymoon, where my Father-In-Law said there were some natural springs that we could relax in. When we got there, they turned out to be training grounds." Ukyou said, stepping forward. These training grounds were cursed. You jumped from pole to pole whilst avoiding the natural springs below, but my Father-In-Law knocked us into two different pools.

"These pools were the Nannichuan and Nyannichuan. The springs of drowned boy and girl respectively. I landed in the boy spring. This means that when either of us get hit by cold water, we change genders."

"Hot water changes us back, but only until next time." Said Ranma.

"Any questions?" said the Sensei.

Immediately, a bunch of hands went up. The sensei pointed at a girl near the front, called Yuka.

"These are pretty bold claims. Can you prove them?"

Ranma pulled out a bottle of water, and then dumped it over his head.

For five whole seconds, the class were silent. Then, there was a cacophony of noise as they all started shouting.

"No way!"

"That can't be real!"

"It must be a magic trick, it MUST!"

"Damn, that Ranma sure looks cute."

"What about the girl, Ukyou!?"

Ukyou heard the last one and then pulled out her own bottle. She then poured the contents over herself, saving a little to heat back up.

Simultaneously, all the girls in the class swooned. How could there be a more handsome man!? The laws of physics showed that this was not possible!

Ukyou-kun pulled out his portable griddle, and heated up a pan of water. He then poured half the pan over Ranma, and then over himself.

After changing back, there was silence again. All except for one person.

"You…YOU PERVERTS!"

The class sweatdropped. Akane Tendo had found ANOTHER thing wrong with some people. It was clear the new students were going to get a verbal assault on why they were perverted. Probably something to do with the fact that they could change sexes, and 'peep'. They weren't wrong.

"How could you do this to yourselves? If you're married, and want to see the other persons…areas, then just hop in the bed! Isn't that what most married couples do!?" Akane cried. "And then there's the fact you, Ranma, tried marrying me as well!"

"Whoa, whoa, back up!" Ranma shouted, holding his hands out in front of him. "When did I try marrying you?"

"Two days ago, when you three weirdos came to my home!"

The rest of the class assumed that the third 'weirdo' was the father.

As if on cue, Genma came in, clutching a megaphone. "THAT WAS AN AGREEMENT BETWEEN YOUR FATHER AND I! RANMA IS HONOUR-BOUND TO FOLLOW THROUGH WITH THE ARRANGEMENT!"

"Yeah, like you know about honour, pop." Ranma sniped. His father winced.

And kept wincing as Ukyou punted him through an open window. "You…YOU IDIOT! Ranma and I are MARRIED! Doesn't that mean a THING to you!?"

"Not really………" the class heard Genma shout, his voice fading off into the distance until he became a spec in the sky.

The sensei decided to try and gain control of the situation. "Class, class, settle down!" He turned to the couple. "If you want to continue…?"

They nodded. "I am also an accomplished chef, and I will be opening a restaurant in the town soon."

"What's the name of the restaurant?" asked a voice from the back.

"I'm not sure yet. We need to decide on a name." Ukyou replied. "I was thinking of calling it 'Ucchan's', but I want Ran-chan here to be recognised."

"That'll do for now." Said the Sensei. "If you want to find out more about Ranma and Ukyou, ask them at break. Now, English."

The married couple went to sit down in some empty desks next to each other.

::::::::::

At break, the new students were surrounded by a crowd of eager individuals. They had heard that the new students were martial artists, and were waiting for Kuno, their 'prized warrior' to turn up.

"YOU, THERE! Boy in the red shirt!" said a loud voice off from the main building.

Ranma looked up. A tall, simple looking boy was heading his way, with a girl by his side that had a striking resemblance. Sister, Ranma presumed.

"I hear false tales of how you are a fighter of high standards. Is this true?"

"Depends what you call high." Ranma replied.

"You will call me Upperclassman Kuno, whelp!"

"OK, Kuno."

Kuno smiled. "Oh, a cocky one, eh?" He pulled out a wooden sword, and held it in front of him in a ready pose." I am Tatewaki Kuno, descendant of samurai, and I shall teach you a lesson, for I am the Blue Thunder of Furinkan School!" he announced. There was a resounding crack of, indeed, thunder on his words as well.

"I'm Ranma Saotome, Heir to the Saotome School of Anything Goes. And I think I'm gonna bunk that lesson, thank you."

"Fool. You have just let yourself in for a world of pain!"

And the fight started.

* * *

Notes:

There we go, Chapter two up. Hope you enjoy.

chm01: You wanted to know, here you go! (Hey, that rhymes... Haha!)

Escoger: Thank's for the feedback. I have a story plan saved on my computer that I update with ideas and have a general plot written in. And with Ranma's Ki bolts, he's a Ki Adept, meaning it all comes easily to him. He developed the techniques on his own. It says so in the first chapter, right before the couple's dunks.

de bombz: Perfect? In your eyes maybe, but then again, you never really think anything you do yourself is perfect. Thank you, anyway. Oh, and here you go.

NEXT TIME:  
Ranma and Kuno fight, Nabiki takes bets and the restaurant opens!

PS: Like Ukyou told her new class, I really am having trouble thinking of a name. If you have an idea, please tell me. I'll pick out of them, and you will have my eternal thanks.


	3. Elsewhere in the world

Shampoo walked down the unlit road, consumed in her thoughts. _It's clear that I'm going to have to go back to China_, she thought._ Great-Grandmother will not be pleased_.

Shampoo had left the village of Joketsuzoku to pursue the ideal dream of a well-paid job, a nice home and a strong husband. She had found none of them. Shampoo sighed.

Xian Pu, Warrior of the Joketsuzoku tribe of Amazons, was defeated.

She kept walking down the cold, unlit road with only a plastic carrier bag with sheets and clothes in for company. She would be walking for a while.

:::::::::::::::

Furinkan School

Nerima

Ranma braced himself for the fight. He knew he would win, but it wasn't wise to assume like that. His father had drummed a phrase into his and Ukyous heads, by constantly saying it: Assume makes an ass out of you and me. Ranma smiled. He liked the play on words in that saying.

Noting Kuno's stance, he decided he would make wild swings. _Meh, _thought Ranma. _What could possibly go wrong?_

Suddenly, there was thunder and lightning from directly above their heads. The population of Furinkan School looked up, wondering why the weather had changed so quickly.

Ukyou sighed. Ranma must have jinxed it again. Looking around, she noticed that the middle Tendo daughter, Nabiki was running around, collecting money off people, noting down how much they had given. Ukyou sighed again. The girl was taking bets.

Kuno started the fight first. He did, indeed make wild swings, it would seem to anybody who didn't know his fighting style, but what they actually were were decoys. The lunges made the opponent block in the wrong place, leaving themselves open in others. They always worked. But rules, like pie crusts and arranged marriages by two drunk fathers, were made to be broken.

With speed that beggared belief, Ranma blocked the lunge, and then blocked the attack that came in swiftly to his side. Kuno froze, stunned that his moves had been read. All the opening Ranma needed. A quick kick to the chest and Kuno was blasted off his feet and landed in a cloud of dust ten feet away. Ranma stood up straight and chuckled. "Is that it?"

Kuno ran forward out of the dust, suprising Ranma, and made a wild, genuine stab at Ranma. The pigtailed martial artist barely jumped back in time.

"Impressive," said Kuno. "You will be a worthy adversary, but you shall never defeat me!" The last words were highlighted by Kuno starting a series of ultra-fast jabs, speeding up by the second. When finally at top speed, he started yelling. "TATATATATATATATTATATA!!!!" The speed and accuracy of the strikes were so great that the air pressure sped forward, hitting Ranma in his chest, legs and arms. Ranma tried thinking of a way to block the moves, but he realised it was impossible. How could you block air? Ranma ignored the thought and decided that a good offence was a good defence.

Ranma jumped up and over Kuno, Whilst in the air, he called forth his Ki and blasted a bolt at Kuno, one handed. Landing behind the wannabe samurai, he tripped the boy up, making Kuno land awkwardly on his side. Running towards Kuno, he kicked the sword out of the seniors hand and placed his foot on Kuno's head. It was surprisingly comfortable. Ranma decided he would perch on Kuno's head more often.

"Well, Kuno." Said Ranma. "It seems you lost. I heard you were undefeated. What happened?"

"You…beat me…" Kuno said blankly. "Impossible! You must have used treachery! Sorcery!"

Ranma sweatdropped.

"I have heard about how you fell into a magical pool, and I do not believe! There is no such thing!"

Ranma facefaulted this time.

"I shall find the meaning of this treachery, I shall find out how you defeated me, and I shall return the favour!"

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever." Ranma said as he punted the senior into the sky. He then walked over to his wife and the crowd of people near her. "He was a little too easy…" he said to Ukyou.

Kodachi Kuno watched the sky, standing in shock as she saw her brother fly higher and higher, until he was all but a twinkle in the sky. Turning towards the red-shirted boy, she noticed he hadn't even broken a sweat. He was currently talking to the other new girl, who he seemed very friendly with.

Kodachi smiled to herself. She would break up the happy couple. Nobody deserves to be happy after what she had gone through. Nobody.

Ranma and Ukyou managed to get through the day without any major hassles, and walked back to the restaurant together. Ukyou still hadn't decided on a name for it, and had received many suggestions from the school body. Ranma and Ukyou had regarded them all and did not seem to be able to settle on a decision. Many names were good, but none seemed to…suit the couple.

Arriving back at the restaurant, Ukyou took out her key and opened the door to the side of the retail space. Inside were some stairs leading to the flat. After reaching the top, both turned to each other and embraced.

"Well, Ranma," said Ukyou. "How did you like your first day at school?"

"I loved it. Being on the road a lot made it hard to get a decent education." Ranma replied.

"I loved it too…" Ukyou said, dropping her voice to a, lower tone.. "In fact, I loved it so much…."

"Yes..?" Ranma asked, carefully.

"Let me show you how much I loved it, Ran-chan." She said, grabbing Ranma by the arm and dragging into their bedroom.

Ranma grinned like a hyena.

:::::::::::::::

A few hours later, Genma returned to the restaurant and headed upstairs. Wondering where Ranma and Ukyou were, he called out. Receiving no reply, he looked in the rooms. Finally looking in their bedroom, he nearly fell back in shock.

Ukyou and Ranma were asleep in their bed, and it was barely five O' clock in the afternoon.

Genma sighed. He thought he had trained his son to have a higher level of stamina than that…

:::::::::::::::

America

State of New Jersey

Rebecca Brown was walking around her local mall, buying clothes. All was normal before she heard a loud shout in a foreign language.

Turning around, she was surprised to see a Japanese boy with a travel-rucksack on his back. He wore mostly yellow, had a bandanna on and an umbrella on top of his pack. He was shouting a lot. He also seemed to be saying the word 'Ranma' a lot.

Rebecca sighed, and turned around. It was most likely a nutcase that had wandered into the mall by accident. After all, why would you walk around a mall in the middle of New Jersey with heavy camping equipment?

She headed towards the checkout area, and paid for her goods. Turning around to get another good look at the boy, she was surprised to find he was no longer there. He seemed rather handsome if you looked past the face of anger, she thought.

Walking out the store with her bags, she looked around more. The boy was gone…. Curious…

Rebecca shrugged. It was no big deal. This was America. All sorts of things happened in America. Walking out of the mall and towards the car-park, she noted a fair amount of chaos that hadn't been there when she went in. Walls were missing, car alarms were going off and people were….nowhere. It seemed a little too quiet. There was no general hubbub, background noise. There was no sound coming from the street below… It all was a little surreal, thought Rebecca.

Heading to her car, she had to climb over three wrecked cars, that all had an indent in the radiator grill. It was as if they had all ran into pillars of stone, and then the pillars had…disappeared. All the cars, she noted as well, were black, and had no make… They weren't Fords, Toyotas, Rovers….nothing. They were simply black, unmarked cars. All of them the same.

Arriving at her car, Rebecca loaded her shopping into the boot, and got into the drivers seat. Starting her engine, she drove out of her space, around the wreckages strewn throughout the car-park, and headed for the exit. Making it out, she was then surprised to see a police checkpoint covering the road.

Pulling up at the checkpoint, she wound down her window. "What's going on officer?" she asked to the uniformed man waiting.

"Ma'am, what is your reason for leaving the mall?" the officer asked.

"Well," said Rebecca, "I'm leaving because I did some shopping. It's all in the trunk, if you want to check."

"No, that'll be fine, Ma'am. However, we have to ask you if you saw any unusual characters in the mall today."

"I saw one!" Rebecca replied energetically. "He looked like he came from the Far East. He had a travel backpack on, and he was dressed in yellow. I saw him as I was paying for my shopping. I turned round to hand over the money, and then, next thing I know, he's gone…"

Rebecca looked off into space. Sighing, she continued. "He looked quite handsome, if you look past the mask of anger. I think he was angry because he was lost. He certainly looked it." Rebecca snapped out of her daze. "Does that help, Officer?"

The officer finished talking into his radio. "…Repeat, secure the perimeter. Out." Turning back to Rebecca, he replied. "Yes, thank you, Ma'am. We have to ask that you don't tell anyone of what happened here. It is an issue of national security." He signalled to the man operating the gate. "Have a good day, Ma'am."

"Thank you Officer, I'm glad I could help." Rebecca replied as she drove through the now open gate.

Detective Inspector Grant Arnolds smiled. Ryouga Hibiki would not escape this time.

:::::::::::::::

Ryouga ran. He was lost again! And it seemed like he was in America, possibly the worst place he could end up in. Ever since he found himself walking the halls of The White House, and then the Pentagon, he was a wanted criminal, on the FBI's Top 100 Wanted Men.

"Why me!!" Ryouga shouted to the world. All the people around him stared. Dammit, thought Ryouga. I'm still in America, shouting Japanese, pretty much announcing to the FBI and police that I'm here!

Ryouga took a left…or right, he could never which was which… and found himself somewhere new… A lane, filled with trees, and cars parked down each side of the lane. He stopped, recuperated his breath and then decided to run some more.

The lane was long. Very long. Whenever it came to directions or anything to do with travel, Ryouga got it wrong. He sighed. This was one of the few times him being eternally lost was good. At least the American Law Agencies could never find him, and could never predict when he would appear in America.

Ryouga saw a gate in the side of the road, and took it. He suddenly stopped, careful of his footing. It was dark, foggy and cold. Ryouga stepped forward, slowly. The fogs parted, and Ryouga gasped.

A forest of Bamboo poles, as far as he could see, rising out of pools of water. Ryouga stepped towards the nearest pool, careful not to fall in – he wouldn't be able to get his clothes dry for the night if they got soaked – and gazed at his reflection. A mirror copy of himself looked back at him. Ryouga laughed. He looked tired, cold and dirty. He ought to set up camp…

Looking around for a good spot to pitch his tent, he saw a hut. There was steam coming out of the chimney. Ryouga headed for it. At least I'm not alone, thought Ryouga.

Arriving at the hut, he knocked on the door and stepped back. The door opened, and a small, dumpy looking man looked out. Noting Ryouga, he smiled. "Aiya, more visitors. Springs busy recently."

Ryouga was about to question the man, when the guide walked out, lit his pipe and turned to Ryouga. "I suppose you want to use springs to train, yes?" the man said.

"T-Train?" Ryouga stammered. "You mean these are training grounds?"

"Yes, accursed training grounds of Jusenkyo. The springs are cursed to change your body and mind…"

Ryouga listened carefully to the mans story. Ryouga smiled to himself. Oh, yes. He thought. This'll help me defeat Ranma perfectly.

* * *

Notes:

Whee! Chapter three done! Sorry it took so long for this one to be done… A week may not be THAT long, but I was starting to get a writers itch… not sure what I mean by that, but I got it done, nevertheless. I might update every week now, though, as I have a lot going on in my social life.

Oh, also, I lied at the end of the last chapter in the notes. I thought I would have come up with a name for the restaurant by now, but so far, I've only had one suggestion from you, the public. Escoger, thank you for the suggestion….You're the only one so far. I want a choice, however. People, help me! I'm leaving this part of the fic open, so you can have your own influence!

Right…reviews.

Chm01: There's still time. Patience is a virtue.

Sakura Lisel: Yeah, Genma's an idiot. However, he WAS drunk.

Escoger: Thank you for your feedback again! The "Saotome Ucchan" is the only suggestion so far. I want more suggestions from more people by next week, people! I beg you!

ThePageMaster1630: Thank you for that comment. I'm glad you think so. And we'll be seeing more of Akane soon.

Darthme1011: I'm glad you like.

Well, thank you everyone. More soon!


	4. Betrayals of trust, fights over couples

The next week or so for Ranma and Ukyou was fairly standard. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, except for Kuno now having a morning showdown with Ranma every day at the school gates. Many trees were harmed, and eventually, the school started making plans for the nearby vacant lot to be purchased. They argued it would provide better facilities for PE and free time, but everyone in the school body knew it'd be a safer place for the fights.

Over the week, Ranma and Ukyou had received dozens of suggestions from other students, and even people on the street about a name. One that stuck in their minds was Saonji's. Ranma immediately took a liking to it, whereas Ukyou was anxious.

"Come on," said Ranma. "It's a great name! It sticks in your head and is unique. It also honours our families!"

"But I HATE my family…" Ukyou muttered, much like a small child would mutter about not getting their dream toy for their birthday.

Ranma sighed. "I know you hate them, Ucchan, but you shouldn't. You only have one family by blood, and you should always love them. I love my pop... in a sense." Ranma then started pondering if he really did love his father. He had done some stupid things in his life, but… he was family.

"But how CAN I love them!?" My mother…and siblings… ignored me so much when we visited! Only my father could be happy for me…"

Ranma sighed again. It was becoming a rather dull pastime, sighing. He decided to cook some food, using the culinary skills he had picked up from Ukyou, and decided to make some ramen. Okonomiyaki wasn't the only thing the chef could make, after all.

"After all, I ignored a family tradition!" Ukyou continued. "We're supposed to carry over the wife's family name! You should be Ranma Kuonji!"

"To take your name wouldn't matter to me. I'd still love you, Ucchan. It's just that my dumb dad made us agree that we would take Saotome."

"I'm not happy with him either." Ukyou muttered again, the same tone as earlier.

Ranma chuckled, and served his creation into a bowl. Offering his wife some, she agreed. They snapped their chopsticks and sat down.

:::::::::::::::

Kuno muttered, as he paced the halls of the manor he and his family owned. His demented sister was in her room, and had not come out since they had returned from school. His father, even more demented, was in Hawaii – again – heading the International Barber Convention. It'd only be a couple of months before he would be back, and imposed his insane teachings on the school again. Kuno smiled a little to himself. Having a father as the principal had its benefits, in ways. He had diplomatic immunity in the school grounds and ALWAYS got pass marks, always about a question away from a fail. However, being the son of a demented barber-turned-principal, he was often subject to inane attempts by his dad to try out new 'hairstyles'. Often involving most of his hair on the floor/ground/water. It depended where the Heir to the Kuno fortunes was when Daddy interpreted a Barbershop Quartet wrongly.

Kuno resumed pacing, thinking. _How can I defeat that foul Saotome? He had a strong defence, and an even stronger offence. There seems to be no way of gaining access to his body without him doing so willingl—_

Lightning struck, and the halls of Kuno Manor were filled with evil laughter.

:::::::::::::::

Shampoo walked and walked. It had been days since she had left Tokyo by foot, and navigating the mountainous Japanese wilderness hadn't been easy. She had no tent to rest, no clean clothes, and many a wild animal had taken their chances. She won, of course, but not before the surprise attack got some scratches in.

However, with steely determination, Shampoo walked on. She would get back to the Joketsuzoku and make a fresh start. Sure, she'd have to go through a rigorous punishment, at the hands of her great-grandmother, and the rest of her family. Her mother would not be happy, and even her brother – a lowly male! – would have a say in her punishment.

She wasn't looking forward to it, but….it had to be done. It was the way of her tribe, the way of her people. Even the ones who had left for good still followed the beliefs of the Chinese Amazons. But most of all, the one thing that kept Shampoo walking steadily, was that it was the way she wanted.

Shampoo crested a hill and saw ocean. And then a thought struck her.

"*HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO GET ACROSS THE SEA OF JAPAN!?*" she shouted in chinese, birds flocking into the sky, making hypnotic patterns as they tried to avoid the hunter they believed was after them.

:::::::::::::::

Ukyou was happy. The restaurant floor had just been completed, and the Health and Safety suits had confirmed the place as one of the most organised they had ever seen. Ukyou smiled. Ever since she had discovered Feng Shui, the art of furniture arranging, she had a natural eye for the placement of items around a public place. The space between tables was spacious, and the large griddle installed let people know immediately that they were in a good place. It was curved, a semicircle out of the wall and had the hot surface on top, with a small section for ingredient preparation and another for transactions. The H&S had personally approved the design and so – by far the most important critic – had Ranma. All that remained was a name…

"I tell you, Saonji's is perfect!" Ranma called down the stairs from the flat as he did some homework.

"To you, maybe. But not to me, Ranchan!" Ukyou called back. She was behind her new griddle, making dinner for the two, whilst also getting used to the layout of the workspace.

"HAH!" Ranma shouted back. "WOMEN!"

Suddenly, a rather drunk Genma burst in through the doors. "I-hic-I'll drin...drink to 'at, m'boy!"

"And where have you been?" asked Ukyou. She was wearing her bandoleer of spatulas, and was poised to take out a few to be thrown if Genma made just ONE wrong syllable.

"Pub." He answered simply. "T' se- sello… cellu… drink to the ha'iness o' my kids!

_Aww…_ thought Ukyou. _Wait… Kids?_

"What do you mean... kids? As in more than one child?" Ukyou asked, her gaze piercing.

Genma flinched. He looked at those eyes. The green was blinding! It was almost eating into him, it was that strong. Mentally, he sobered up for his next sentence, preparing to cover any mistake he may have made. "I mean you and Ranma. You're my dau'er now…" he said, slipping back into a drunken state as he finished.

He then promptly passed out from the vast amount of Sake he'd consumed.

Ukyou sighed bitterly, and served up dinner.

:::::::::::::::

Ryouga tramped through the wilderness, his pack barely a weight on his shoulders. He was quite used to it, these days. The many years of long-distance walking had increased his stamina and the muscles in his legs were on a par with Olympic athletes, if not, stronger.

Carefully, he checked the small plastic container of water attached to his pack. Double-checking the seal, he continued, and found himself in familiar territory.

Ryouga stared. His orangey-yellow widening as he clapped eyes on the familiar house.

"Home..!" he practically shouted. "I'm…I'm home!"

Ryouga blasted through the door, ignoring such rudimentary things as locks on doors, and in fact, doors as a whole concept, and went straight up the stairs. He followed the large signs that led him to his room, and collapsed on his bed.

"Home…" he sighed. Ryouga climbed onto his bed, and nearly cried at the luxury of a mattress. Within seconds, the lost boy was sleeping.

:::::::::::::::

It was raining.

Ranma-chan and Ukyou-kun left the restaurant out of the flat door, a little way to the left. Upon entering the downpour, they both sighed at the same time.

"Stupid rain…" muttered Ranma-chan. "Why today?"

They left for school, bags on their backs, hand-in-hand.

Upon arriving, they dispatched Kuno with ease, and made their ways to the restrooms. They quickly dashed into their true genders' respective doors, and returned a few moments later, slightly steaming as the warm water clung to their skin and evaporated. They headed for their homeroom, and caught sight of one Akane Tendo.

Akane had since calmed down after the incident at her house. She was never one to hold a grudge for long, and she knew that they had attacked her father by accident.

Actually, a giant panda had attacked her dad. He would be dealt with.

Ranma and Ukyou dried themselves off quickly, using their Ki to super-heat their bodies, and sizzle the water away. Promptly sitting down, they got their books out, and prepared for the first lesson.

Well, one of them did. The other decided that English would be a great time to catch up from that lost sleep after last nights… exercise.

Ukyou grumbled. True, Ranma had lived up to his name. After all, 'Wild Horse' must mean something, but to replenish that energy in lesson? Disgraceful. Never mind. Ranma could cook for himself tonight as punishment.

Ranma didn't catch the 40 winks he was after.

"Umm, Ranma…" asked a girl from the class. Yuka, he believed her name was. "Could I talk to you quickly outside for a second..?"

"Sure." Ranma replied, getting up and following.

Once outside, Yuka made her true intentions known.

And kissed Ranma.

Ukyou, who decided to follow a few seconds after, nearly collapsed.

Ranma, who was frozen in shock, did nothing to prevent the kiss. Several beads of sweat rolled down his face. OH MY GOD, IS THAT A TONGUE!? He mentally shouted, as a wet feeling ran over his lips. And kept going, all over his body.

The rest of the water landed on the floor, making the classic splash. Ukyou threw the bucket at Ranma-chan's head.

"HOW DARE YOU!!" she shouted, before running off in tears.

"U-Ucchan!" Ranma-chan shouted back. "Wait, STOP!"

Several spatulas came heading her way. Ranma-chan deftly caught them one-handed, and cast them at the ground. She proceeded to run after her beloved, and immediately, felt her arm not moving. She fell back, nearly dislocating her shoulder. She looked back, and saw she had been handcuffed to a gas pipe.

"She doesn't deserve you, y'know." Said Yuka. "I've seen her going around with other guys. And kissing them. Ooh, I even saw one of them getting rather…hands on, if you know what I mean…" the girl said, whilst suggestively highlighting certain areas of her body that could have had said hands on them.

An instinct came across Ranma, and she followed it through.

*SMACK*

Yuka flew off the ground, and slid across the floor. A large, angry hand-print showing across her face.

"Bitch." Ranma-chan spat. "Ukyou would never, NEVER do that!"

Yuka looked up, tears filling her eyes. She scrabbled backwards away from the still-handcuffed Ranma. "You…you slapped me!"

"Yeah, and?" Ranma replied fiercely.

"You hit a girl!" Yuka cried.

"I'm a girl too, in case you haven't noticed!" Ranma shouted.

"Yeah, but not underneath! You're really a boy! And you slapped me!"

Ranma-chan picked up one of the spatula, and drove it through the chain, snapping the weak metal. "You spread lies about me or my wife again, and it'll be more than a slap, I guarantee you!"

Ranma-chan left the crying girl in the hallway, and ran after her wife.

* * *

Notes: Well, I finally got this one out. A lot of key bashing late at night, and my tiredness made me forget to add these notes, as well as some basic formatting, like italicizing thoughts. Done now! ^_^

Onto the reviews!

chm01: Duly noted!

Escoger: Yup. Shampoo's got some trouble ahead of her soon. The punishments will be... severe. And my defenition of facefault is the stupid face all characters pull when they aren't expecting something. Ranma's eyes pull back to his ears and his mouth turns non-existent. Kuno's version would be a volcano on his head. But only when he's... excited. Ryouga's law predicament will be fleshed out soon, as well.

Moon Miko: Thank you! Praise makes me blush. Your name, Saonji's, stuck in my mind. But Ukyou had some family troubles, and isn't all that fond of them. All will be explained. Ranma loves it, though.

Dumbledork: As interesting as your name? :p

Well, that's it for now. I shall update soon, and when I do, you'll love it. It's all going to kick off...!


	5. Explanations and revelations

Ukyou ran. She ran as fast as she could, ignoring the rain that was pouring outside. As Ukyou-kun ran through the streets of Furinkan, he cried, the tears mingling with the water falling from his dripping fringe.

_How!? How could Ranma do this to me!?_ Thought Ukyou. _I thought he loved me, but no. He's a womanizer! It's clear now! The other Fiancée, the girl in the corridor….me._

The thought made his tears fall all the faster.

::::::::::::::

The red-haired girl ran through the playground, wondering where her wife had gone.

"Shit!" Ranma-chan shouted. She was still angry from what Yuka had said. Ranma knew that Ukyou would never do that sort of thing. She KNEW! She knew in her heart that her oldest friend, who she had known for ten years and had married, would NEVER do something like that. Ukyou was not like that. She just wasn't.

::::::::::::::

Yuka's crying had caused the class to stop what they were doing, and see what happened. They had seen the girl on the wet floor, and assumed that she had pissed off Ukyou. Many of the girls knew what had happened, as Yuka had told them a couple of days over lunch what her feelings were for the newcomer. Akane and another friend, Sayuri, went to the crying girls' side. As they understood what had happened, Akane pulled a mallet from…nowhere, and vowed that she would get the perverts, her rage from the previous week now back. Sayuri opted to stick to her friends' side, hoping that Yuka would be okay.

Two boys that Ranma had connected with, Hitoshi and Daisuke frowned.

"Would you guess Yuka would do something like that?" Hitoshi asked.

"Nope." Daisuke replied. "She was always quiet, too. It's not like her to do something like this."

"Yeah…." Hitoshi muttered. "What does she see in Ranma that she don't see in us, anyway? I mean, we're strong, brave, courageous, and of course, handsome."

Daisuke laughed. "Thanks for describing me so perfectly!" he joked. "I'm not sure about you, though." That earned him a punch on the arm.

::::::::::::::

Japan

Hokkaido

A martial artist stormed another Dojo, defeating the owner and gaining more money for his travels. Chuckling, he left and headed south. He wore a black vest with a utility vest over that. He carried a pack, and had a plain bandanna round his head. He called himself Ranma Saotome.

Ranma headed for a restaurant, and grabbed a bite to eat. Using his newly-earned money, he bought the most expensive thing on the menu. Whilst waiting for the food to be served, he pulled out a scroll. On it was his 'name' and the words 'Genma Saotome'. Opening the scroll, he read more and more. When his food arrived, he grinned and rolled the scroll back up, placing it back in the secure part of his pack.

Whilst eating, the boy mulled over some things. _I will find you, Genma Saotome, and learn the counter. Then I will be unstoppable. And I shall avenge…_

His mind drifted back to when he was young. His father conversing with a tall man, with a moustache. A scroll was handed over, and his fathers' eyes glistened.

Five hours later, his father was dead.

The boy ate the rest of his food in silence, tears in the corners of his eyes.

::::::::::::::

Ukyou-kun sat underneath a railway bridge, head in hands. Not knowing what to do, she sat more, the rain now a mere drizzle.

"Ukyou?"

Ukyou-kun looked up, seeing a small, red-haired girl. "Go away!" he screamed. "Get out of my sight! You go and run off with that hussy, I'll just be here for you to pick up and break some more!"

"Ukyou, I-"

"I DON'T CARE!" the brown-haired boy screamed back. "I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!"

"But…" Ranma-chan started, her words trailing off into nothing.

Ranma-chan stood there, looking at her wife…husband…whatever. Tears formed in her eyes, something that had never happened in this body before.

"Ukyou, listen to me," Ranma-chan started again. "Yuka came onto me. She asked me if she could talk with me outside. She didn't even say anything; she just forced herself at me. Then you came." Ranma-chan sighed. "She tried telling me that you had been going off with other guys, and she really started grating. So I slapped her."

Ukyou-kun looked up. "You slapped her?"

"Yeah." Ranma-chan said, her voice sounding empty. "I dunno what came over me. I just felt my arm moving, and next thing I know, she's on the floor." Ranma-chan looked into Ukyou-kun's eyes. "I think it's my body," she said. "I've never had that urge before, but this is the first time that situation has happened when I was a girl."

"Are you saying that I'll get…..male urges…?" Ukyou-kun said, looking at her husband/wife.

"I think you already have one." Ranma-chan said, blushing slightly. She pointed at Ukyou-kun's trousers, and Ukyou-kun's nearly fell out of their sockets.

"I never thought…."

"You find this body attractive, then?" Ranma-chan said, smirking.

"Hush….I'm not like that!" Ukyou-kun protested. "I don't swing that way!"

"Ucchan, after all that's happened to us, we're as bent as pipe-cleaners."

Ukyou-kun laughed, despite knowing what Ranma-chan was insinuating.

"Come on, let's go home." Ranma-chan said, holding out her hand.

Smiling weakly, Ukyou-kun accepted.

::::::::::::::

Shampoo swam, in the end. She'd done stuff like this before, but the seas were particularly rough. Lucky I have such high stamina, thought Shampoo.

Many hours later.

Shampoo set up camp on the Chinese beach. She was exhausted! Using branches/leaves and other items, Shampoo made a shelter that would keep the worst of the elements off her.

Tomorrow she would start the long journey to her people.

And soon she would be punished.

::::::::::::::

Ryouga woke up slowly. It had been a good sleep, and he didn't want to get up, lest he be lost again. However, Ryouga's stomach had other ideas.

Cursing his needs, Ryouga followed the colour-coded arrows to various parts of his home. It was the one place he couldn't get lost. And thank god for that, he thought.

It was around lunch that Ryouga remembered that he had to gain revenge on Ranma.

Ryouga became depressed, as he recalled what had happened, three years earlier.

_-----------------------_

_"C'mon, Ryouga, you know you can do better than that!"_

_Ryouga cried out a battle roar, and ploughed forward. Ranma saw that it was all offence, and took advantage of the numerous openings available. Thirty seconds later, Ryouga was on the floor._

_The lost boys' eyes sparked. This cannot be! He thought. I shall not be defeated by a traveller!_

_At the sidelines, Checkers, Ryouga's guide-dog, sat patiently. Ryouga's parents observed the fight, also._

_"This Ranma is formidably skilled…" said Ryouga's dad. He was tall, with little hair and wore a black shirt and pants. His glasses were old, plastic frames with dirty lenses._

_"Yes…" replied Ryouga's mother. "I don't want little Ry-chan to get hurt, though!" Ryouga's mother was good looking for her age, and wore a yellow sun-dress. Her eyes stayed on the fight, as she prayed to the Kami that her son wasn't injured._

_The fight progressed, Ryouga taking more care of his defence now, and stretched until the late evening. Both young teens were tired, and left so many openings that the other could have won easily. But they were both so tired that they didn't acknowledge such openings, repeating the habit of punch-kick-chop-jump. The Kata that they both knew were working against them in that they were following it out of sync with each other, blocking each others moves._

_As the nearby clock tower struck midnight, Ryouga's father came down._

_"OK, boys. It's midnight; you've both been fighting for hours. You're both too tired to work effectively, so I'm calling off the rest of your match for next week." Both boys nodded. "Ryouga, come on home now." His father said._

_"Yes, dad." Said Ryouga._

_Ranma looked at the other boy. "You fought well, man!" he said, holding out a hand. "I look forward to next week!"_

_"As do I, Saotome." Ryouga said, grasping the hand and pumping it fully. Both had adopted the western method of politeness as a symbol of their friendly rivalship._

_Both turned to head for home, Ryouga and family led by Checkers._

_::::::::::::::_

_A few days later, reports came in of the Hibiki family never returning to their home. Although they were known to get lost easily, it was reported that their dog was with them as well, which acted like a guide-dog for them. What was more worrying was that there was no evidence as to where they were._

_Ryouga and Ranma never had their fight the next week. Ryouga believed that Ranma, his idiot father and his friend, Ukyou, had somehow made sure that they would never get home, so that the match would forfeit to him._

_From then on, Ryouga never shook another person's hand._

_-----------------------  
_

Ryouga's eyes moistened. He had recently found graves in his parents names, and the dates they died corresponded to the day they all got separated. _Yes,_ Ryouga thought. _Ranma shall be punished for killing my family._

* * *

Notes:

A rather short chapter, this one. It's late here, and I should get some rest. Meh.

I probably won't update again till Boxing Day, at the earliest. Anything earlier...happy early present. =P

Onto the reviews from the last chapter. All two of them. (OK, so I didn't really leave enough time to get some more feedback. So shoot me.)

**chm01:** The forecast has low pressure and lots of wind. Yeah, there's gonna be a storm. Break out your umbrellas.

**Dumbledork:** Thank you. And as for Yuka, well... it's the first of many suprises.

All done! Where's my pillow?

Until next time! SOTG Out!

{edit note: Than you, Sakura Lisel, for pointing out that fundamental error. I do proof-read, but i missed that part. My apologies to anyone else confused.)


	6. Calm before the storm

Shampoo hiked and hiked across open Chinese country. Her stamina and strength the only reasons she was still alive, having not eaten in three days. Her stomach protested loudly, ordering to be fed. Shampoo ignored it, however. The saying 'Mind over Matter' was commonly used by her people, and it was believed that what your body wants, even needs, is not actually necessary. Chinese amazons pushed themselves and their bodies further than most people. Body-builders had nothing on them.

Shampoo had landed in China eight days ago. As soon as she had rested and recovered from her marathon journey from West Japan, she had hit the road and headed for western China. An arduous journey, no doubt. It had taken a month, last time.

Shampoo thought about the punishments she would have to endure. One favourite was trapping the offender in the middle of a maze with a rather heavy rock attached to them, and then tell them to find the exit. It was made harder by the maze gradually filling with water, though, and the ceiling meant that if you didn't hurry, you would drown.

Shampoo shuddered. She hoped she wouldn't get that punishment. The claustrophobia would be…immense.

Sighing, shampoo pushed the thoughts of the punishments out of her mind. _Focus on the journey, Xian_, she said to herself._ You need to focus, or you won't be alive to receive the trials._

::::::::::::::

Ranma walked to school with his hand in Ukyou's. He smiled as he looked up at the sky. It was a clear blue, with only a few lazy clouds hanging in the vast expanse of air. What would complete this, he decided, would be a lazy day in the park with his wife. A small picnic, a tree to sit in the shade under, a couple of beers, even, for Ranma. He had grown fond of the drink after he got VERY drunk one night and decided he REALLY didn't like his father, and promptly beat the living daylights out of his equally drunk dad. He had recognized that in measured amounts, alcohol is a refreshing drink.

Unfortunately, there was no lazy day in the park. He had to receive his education, and the only thing that made it bearable was knowing that Ukyou would be there. And would be there always.

The first lesson was…_ah, I don't care_, thought Ranma. I_t's a lesson where I'm supposed to learn something. No idea what, but it must be good, right?_

"What're you thinking, Ranchan?" Ukyou asked, trying to bring some conversation to their walk.

"Heh, what am I thinking?" Ranma mused out loud. "I dunno what I'm thinking. I just... think."

"Well, if you were thinking of one thing, what is it?"

For some reason, Ranma felt put on the spot. Desperately, he tried to think about what he was thinking about. He thought he had it, too, but then him thinking he had it made him forget, and he had to try and think about it again. Finally, he came to a decision.

"Do ghosts wear clothes?"

Ukyou immediately cracked up, laughing. "What made you think that?" she said, in between fits of giggles.

"I dunno," said Ranma. "I mean, if they wore clothes, wouldn't they need to change them every now and then? Wouldn't they get dusty?"

Ukyou bent over, laughing so hard she was finding it hard to breathe. Trying to compose herself, she stood up straight again. It didn't last long.

"Surely hygiene should still be an issue for a ghost. And what if they had OCD or something?" Ranma continued, oblivious to his wife's efforts to stop laughing.

Ukyou laughed so hard, that the only way she could get all the laughter out was to collapse to the ground and hold her stomach, laughing until it hurt. After spending five minutes on the floor, with a somewhat worried Ranma looking over her, unsure of what to say.

Ukyou finally got the laughter out of her system, and walked to school again, Ranma in tow, still slightly bewildered. "Was it something I said?" he asked innocently.

Ukyou giggled some more.

::::::::::::::

Ryouga sat in his front room, deciding on how to find Ranma. His atrocious directional sense would mean that he'd never find the rival without a guide. But who's to say that he is even around this area any more? He could be in a different ward of Tokyo, or even a different city! Ranma could be in Kyoto!

No. Ranma was in Tokyo. He was in Nerima. Ryouga could sense it. He didn't know how, but he could. He could sense Saotome's presence, and he smiled. _I'll take my chances_, he thought._ Ranma shall pay for my family. He shall pay._

Retrieving his pack from his room, he made a note to anyone that might enter the house to check it over, keep it clean and so on, stating that he had been round, and that he would try to remain in the nearby area. After placing it in a prominent position on the kitchen counter, he left through the remains of his front door, hoping that the neighbours would repair it with the fund used for paying the household bills that he had set up.

Ryouga then proceeded to follow his instincts, trying to place the vague traces of Ranma's Ki signature. _There,_ he thought. _Ranma is nearby_. Ryouga then followed the Ki signature in the wrong direction, his logic of 'if it's that way, I can get there faster THIS way' aiding his directional sense in leading him astray.

The lost boy followed the path in the air, heading towards the Tokyo Bay.

::::::::::::::

Kyoto

Japan

Hitoshi Onodera and Susan Brown packed their tents away, heading towards the station that would allow them to take the Bullet train to Tokyo. Both walked separately, so as to not attract attention from those who challenged martial artists.

Hitoshi Onodera was in his late teens, around 17 years. He didn't know for sure, as he had no recollection of his family, or anything before the age of five. He had no birth certificate, no family, and almost no friends. He only had himself and his companion. Hitoshi Onodera had no past. He officially didn't exist. All he knew was the Art, and he lived it, breathed it, spoke, ate, drank and fornicated with it. And he was after another Martial Artist, one who had rubbed his nose in the dirt of defeat one too many times. Hitoshi always won. Always. And anyone who proved otherwise wouldn't be around on the planet for long.

Susan Brown, however, was different. She had family, friends and all that. She was 16, half American, half Japanese, and was after the same goal for different reasons. Reasons that she hid from Hitoshi, and for a good reason. She guarded her secrets deeply, and didn't release them for anything in the world, unless that thing she would receive was greater in value than the secret. She was journeying for the same reason as Hitoshi, in that she wanted to avenge her defeat.

They arrived at the station, purchased tickets and headed for Tokyo.

Saotome and Kuonji would soon be defeated.

::::::::::::::

Ranma and Ukyou had been splashed with water by an old lady, making them switch genders. Not wanting to be late for school looking for hot water, they headed to the gates, defeated Kuno, dodged Akane who was still angry with Ranma after the incident with Yuka and headed for class. They could manage a day cursed. They'd done it before, easy.

At lunch, the couple sat underneath a tree, eating packed lunches they had made. Both were talking merrily about the time they had spent in Nerima, when Kuno appeared.

"Whadja want, Kuno?" Ranma-chan asked. "We're eating in private."

"Silence, wench." Kuno spat. "You are the false image that everyone discusses. You are no more than an illusion, trying to confound everyone into thinking you are the alter-ego of the honourless dog Saotome. Since you are no more than an illusion of my heat-opressed brain on this summers day, you are not worthy of my words. I wish to talk to Saotome, and I know that he usually resides here during our midday meal times."

Initially, Ranma-chan wanted to punt Kuno into the atmosphere, but after hearing the rest of what Kuno said, she decided that she would talk to the wannabe swordsman. "Sure thing, Kuno." She said. "I'll just get him. Say, have you got some water, it's awfully hot today."

Kuno, ever the gentleman, handed over a bottle. Ranma-chan then channeled some Ki into the bottle, heating the water up. Stepping behind the tree, she dumped the water over herself.

"You wanted to speak to me?" said a now male Ranma.

"You cur!" shouted Kuno. You claim you defeated me, when you clearly did not! I was not knocked unconscious, and you only disarmed me! I shall teach you how to respect your elders, you knave!"

Ranma yawned openly.

"Have At Ye!" Kuno screamed, lunging with his sword. Ranma jumped straight up, and kicked Kuno in the head, driving him into the ground.

"Still wanna fight?" Ranma asked, enjoying his perch of Kuno's head again.

Kuno swung his sword in such a way that it would have crushed Ranma's skull if he had stayed there. Considering Ranma was standing on Kuno's head, it was a bizarre sight. Kuno swinging his sword up and over his own head, right before Ranma jumped off, and landed on the ground behind Kuno with enough time to see Kuno whack himself over the head with his own weapon.

Stumbling around, Kuno then swore to the Kami. "Ye Gods, how could you let me be ashamed so easily!?" he screamed to the sky. "You let this mongrel of a man, this pitiful excuse for an honourable fighter use such sorcery to attempt a defeat of the great Blue Thunder!? Is nothing on this world fa--" Kuno never go the chance to finish his sentence, as Ranma had jumped over Kuno, raised his palms and had released a ball of orange light at the senior student, blasting the boy towards the main doors of the school, where students picked up the now unconscious swordsman and carried him to the infirmary. Those students would later vouch for Ranma, declaring that Kuno had indeed been knocked out.

"Phew," Ranma said, sitting back down and resuming his lunch. "Nobody insults my honour and gets away with it." He said to nobody in particular.

Ukyou-kun smiled, and continued eating his food.

* * *

Notes:

Merry Christmas!

Hope you all had a good International-Jesus-Day. I thought I'd celebrate by uploading Chapter 6. Hope you enjoyed it.

Onto the reviews of C5!

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Fake Ranma will be dealt with shortly. The next RanxUkyou moment will be in the next chapter, and who knows if Ryouga will rekindle his friendship with Ranma. That's a pretty hard thing to find, your parent's graves. Imagine his pain!

**chm01**: Ryu? Source of evil? Well, I could say yes. But I could also say no. If i was to tell you his good/bad status, it'd spoil the story, and I don't want to be the one grabbing the biggest Chrimbo present under the tree for you and then telling you what it is. (OK, bad Christmas-related metaphor. No more of them. Ever.)

**Dumbledork**: Ryouga has always had a streak of delusion, I feel. But, yeah, he is delusional.

**Sakura Lisel**: OK, let's see. Do you really want to know why Yuka had handcuffs? She was too busy drooling over him fighting than to notice such feeble details as the outcome, and hey, the 'cuffs were attached to a gas-pipe. Her logic could have been 'Will Ranma risk damaging that?' Didn't anticipate razor-sharp spatulas, though.

And as for whoever gave the scroll to Ryu's father.....Perhaps Genma experimented with facial hair... You don't see him in Ryu's memory in the Manga. I should know. I have it in front of me. :p Also, thank you for pointing out that typo in the last chapter. It's been fixed, and I accreddited it to you at the bottom. Cheers!

Well, I'm done. Enjoy, and please give feedback.


	7. Old Friends, New Enemies

Ryouga walked in the right direction. Of course, he didn't realise he was. He only realised he was near Ranma when he suddenly found himself stepping out from behind a tree and observing a fight in the distance. The people fighting were…skilled, to say the least. One was clearly skilled for a reason – it was Ranma. He refused to NOT be skilled. The other person was wearing a samurai outfit, and had a wooden practice sword. Suddenly, Ranma had lured the sword-boy into hitting himself over the head, knocking him out. Ryouga raised an eyebrow. The sword-boy clearly wasn't the sharpest tool in the box. Make that toolshed. No, make that DIY store.

As a couple of other students rolled up to carry the now-unconscious boy to the school that Ryouga was clearly standing in the grounds of, Ranma had sat down and was talking to a brown-haired boy with long hair. He looked eerily familiar, that boy. _Strange. They're obviously good friends_, noted Ryouga. _That's good. That means I can separate them and threaten something horrible to the other guy. Ranma will come running_.

Ryouga smiled a fanged smile. It looked like things were finally going his way, for once.

::::::::::::::

Ranma finished his lunch in record time, and then noticed a… familiar presence.

Ranma looked up. Standing on the other side of the field was a boy around his age, wearing yellow and black clothes. He was smiling, exposing his canines, which were unusually long.

He also had a weary look about him, as if he'd run through bushes, fences and train-wrecks to get here. All of this recalled a particular thought to Ranma.

A hand-shake.

Ranma shuddered. Ever since he had heard that his old best friend, Ryouga Hibiki, and his family went missing, he'd never shaken another's hand. He would hold Ukyou's, of course. But he'd not shake it. Never.

-----------------------

"_C'mon, Ryouga, you know you can do better than that!"_

_Ryouga cried out a battle roar, and ploughed forward. Ranma saw that it was all offence, and took advantage of the numerous openings available. Thirty seconds later, Ryouga was on the floor._

Hah_, thought Ranma, life gleaming in his eyes. _Too easy! Ryouga needs to focus on his co-ordination and speed. Power is good, but no good if you can't get a hit in.

_Ryouga came at Ranma again, now focusing more on defence, noting Ranma's stance and what Kata they were both familiar with he could use. As soon as Ryouga saw a familiar stance, he blocked the blow that was inevitably coming successfully._

_At the sidelines, Genma sat, cross legged. He observed where Ranma was skilled in the art, and where he still needed to learn. He clearly had a lot of speed, enough to dodge blows that no ordinary man could avoid, but he needed to work on his confidence – losing some of the cockiness, that is. Genma had learnt the hard way that too much confidence can be your downfall. You start to think that it'll be too easy, and next thing you know BAM! You're on the ground, looking at the foot that's about to come crashing down on your face._

_No, he'd need to take the boy on a trip to somewhere he couldn't be too sure of himself. Somewhere that was completely new. A different set of traditions, a different way of li—China! China had all that! Of course, it was clear now! Take the boy to China, that'll teach him patience and manners._

_The boys in the middle of the field were holding their fight whilst the other boys' father came down and spoke to them. __Genma snorted. He probably should have gone down there, but why would he? _Instead,_ he decided, _I'd better be off to the camp. Ukyou's been there all evening on her own. Poor girl. I told her that we shouldn't have gone to see her family. It'll only end in tears, I said. It'll only end in tears and fights, and tantrums… And of course, it did.

_Genma sighed. He wasn't a cruel father. Sure, the disastrous training he had put Ranma through when he was younger had scared the living daylights out of the poor father and Ukyou. Ranma was never the same since that. _Perhaps the cockiness is a mask to hide that,_ thought Genma._ It'd make sense, after all…

_Ranma walked up to his father as Genma was standing up, getting ready to leave._

"_Good fight, boy?" Genma asked._

"_Fantastic!" said the young teen. His eyes shone with adrenaline, dulled only slightly by tiredness. Genma noted that it was midnight, looking at a clock above a shop selling…clocks. _

"_Well, we'd better hurry back; Ukyou's been alone since you started the fight." Genma said, not looking down at his son._

"_Ranma looked up, feeling a little left out of his father's love by not having eye-contact. "You mean Ucchan didn't come?" Ranma said, worried. He thought he'd seen his best friend behind the fence of the field a couple of hours ago, and was looking forward to telling her about all of the best parts of the fight. Where he was winning, of course!_

_Father and son arrived at the camp and saw that Ukyou had put herself to bed. Saying their goodnights, Genma went into his tent, whilst Ranma sat outside looking up at the stars for a while. He shared a tent with his father, Ukyou had insisted on that. Sure, they were friends, but that didn't mean they could sleep together! Ranma had balked at the idea anyway – sleeping with a girl! Eww! So what if they were friends!? At least his pop was a guy. And anyway, he'd always slept next to his pop. Ever since he could remember._

Well, I'd better get some kip, _thought Ranma. _Pops'll probs try and take us somewhere stupid soon. We're due a move. It better not be before next week, though. I'm due a rematch with Ryouga. _Ranma smiled at the thought of that fight. He couldn't wait._

-----------------------

"Are you OK, Ranchan?"

Ranma jumped, shaking the cobwebs of memory out of his head. "Uhh, yeah, sure! I am!" he replied, sounding far too happy compared to how he had looked before.

"Well, if you say so, Ranchan." Said Ukyou-kun.

Ranma went back to looking at the character on the other side of the field. He was still there, but he looked…subdued now. As if he was remembering something as well. Ranma looked closer. The boy was glowing. A dark green colour was emanating from his very being, his skin seemed to have changed colour. "You see that?" he asked Ukyou-kun, prodding the girl-turned-boy in the ribs, pointing over the field.

"The boy? Yeah, it's a boy. So what? It's not like he's glowing, or anything."

Ranma looked at the boy again. He was still glowing…._Of course!_ Ranma thought. _Ukyou's not as sensitive to Ki as I am! I can see his aura even though he's not projecting it, because I'm more sensitive the the stuff._

Ranma stood up, and walked over to the boy. Ukyou-kun didn't. He could see that Ranma was going to work things out. Best leave him to it.

"You." Ranma said simply, looking in the boys eyes directly. "Who are you?"

Ryouga smiled. "I am Ryouga Hibiki. And don't bother introducing yourself, I know who you are, Saotome."

"How do you know who I am?!" Ranma asked, eyes alive with adrenaline, the expectation of a fight dancing inside.

"Do you not remember who I am?" Ryouga asked, genuinely disappointed. "Perhaps we can work out why I'm after you…..like men." Ryouga said, extending his hand, for the first time in three years, for Saotome to shake. Every fibre of Ryouga's body screamed at him to take his hand back, telling him he was sullying his family's name, that he was disgracing them by offering to shake the hand of the last person to shake it, the last person to probably see his family alive, the person that he believed killed them!

Ryouga ignored the instincts. His arm stayed.

Ranma looked at the hand in front of him, gaining a headache with every passing second as the synapses in his mind fired, linking up parts of his memory that he had not worked out for years. _Of course!_

The last person that he shook the hand of was his old rival, Ryouga Hibiki! The same boy was standing in front of him, and he was offering his hand. Should he accept? His senses were telling him that there was a fight imminent. He didn't care, he was looking forward to one. He wanted to kick some butt! Kuno couldn't challenge him great enough. Ranma wanted a REAL fight!

Slowly, Ranma extended his hand. By this time, half the school had realised something was going on, and had gathered nearby. Ukyou-kun was at the front, and he was shocked enough to see Ranma about to accept the handshake. He knew what had happened, and he could sense… Ukyou-kun could not explain how, but he could sense, that some epic stuff was about to go down.

Ranma grasped the other boy hand. Ryouga, he said his name was. "Ryouga, was it? It's been a long time."

Ryouga smiled a fanged smile. "Yes, Ranma. It's been too long."

Faster than the eyes of anyone except he, Ranma and Ukyou could follow, his free hand went up to his head, ripped off a bandanna and wrapped it round his and Ranma's wrists. He expertly tied a knot in it with one hand. "NOW FIGHT, YOU COWARD!!!"

Ranma was stuck fast. The bandanna was stuck fast. _Damn, how did he do that so fast!?_ He thought.

"NOW FIGHT, YOU COWARD!!!" said the other boy. Ranma smiled slightly. Looks like his senses weren't wrong. "I'D LOVE TO!"

The crowd cheered. They were overdue a good fight. And it looked like this one was gonna be GOOD!

* * *

Notes:

Took longer than normal to write this chapter. No idea why. Meh.

Reviews!!

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Herb will show up at some point in the future, Mousse is going to be at the Joketsuzoku. He'll have a part to play in Shampoo's trials, too. A big part.

**Mat49324**: Ranma and Ukyou on the beach? Hmm, not in the forseeable future. It's possible, though. The poolside is likely. It all depends on what happens. Seriously, this story is pretty much writing istelf...

**chm01**: No idea, mate. Honestly no idea. The Chaos Magnet is something I'll look into, though. Perhaps near the end of the story. I like a couple of idea's i've seen in other fanfictions, and I might use variations on them. ^^ Don't sue me, if you recognise what fics as well, when it eventually happens.

Well, that's reviews for CH6 done. Only three. Shame, really.

If you've been reading this and haven't left a review, please do! I know people do read these1 I get about 100-200 unique hits on every new chapter. If you have tried reviewing, I've activated Anonymous reviews, so now you CAN review, even if you don't have an account! I value my readers. I want to hear from you! Please, review! The button is right below!

Eeh, it's your choice. I can't be bothered any more....

...

C&C PLEASE!! Lol.


	8. Ryouga Vs Ranma

"Xian Pu!"

Shampoo looked up. Her trek across most of China had drained her to the point of exhaustion. Her near-endless stamina had at last found it's mark, and the Chinese Amazon was ready to collapse at her feet. The voice that called was familiar, but nobody was in sight…

Shampoo then saw her suitor running towards a nearby tree.

"Xian Pu! You're so thin! I told you Japan wasn't right for you, and now look at you!"

"Mu Tze, you idiot!" Shampoo called out in her native tongue. "I'm over here! Put your glasses on, you blind fool!"

"Xian, there you are. I was so worried, we received no letters. Most of the tribe thought you were dead, at the hand of those firearms that are out there." Mousse brandished an arm out, indicating the rest of the world. Clinks of metal were heard in his sleeve as it moved.

"Ha! Nobody could defeat an Amazon. You were all foolish to think that." Shampoo replied matter-of-factly.

Mousse blushed. He was the only person to think that maybe his beloved Shampoo could be hurt. He'd never admitted these thoughts to anyone else, except to Shampoo's great-grandmother, Cologne, or Kul On. Of course, he'd never admit that to Shampoo, otherwise she'd think him stupid, dumb, blind and a pest. _OK, to be fair, one of those four is right._ Mousse thought to himself. _It's not like I'm a pest anyway. I just like…to proclaim my love for Xian wherever I see her. Is that not love?_

_No, _a little voice in his head said. _It's desire._

_Desire can become love, fool! Everybody knows that!_ Mousse's conscious thoughts shouted back.

_Have it your way…_ the voice replied, fading into the distances, even though it was in his head.

"Come," Mousse said softly, noticing how exhausted the girl was. "I'll help you get back. If you want me to do anything useful, just ask."

_How about bugger off…_ Shampoo thought darkly. However, the thoughts did not gain voice. Shampoo walked ahead of Mousse towards the Joketsuzoku. Her trials awaited.

::::::::::::::

"RANMA!" Ryouga shouted, "NOW YOU FIGHT! You shall not run away, you or your accursed friend!

"Hey!" shouted a still-male Ukyou-kun. He bristled with the insult, and looked around for some water that she could heat up. It was a hot day, so many students had bottles of it around, and Ukyou-kun swiftly took a bottle, funnelling hot Ki into it, warming up the clear liquid enough to trigger the curse's temporary antidote.

Suddenly, a shard of light caught Ukyou-kun's eye. As he looked for where it came from, he noticed Ryouga's travel pack, with a gourd of water firmly attached to it. Carefully, he went over to the pack as subtle as he could, avoiding the attention of either fighter currently ripping the school grounds apart.

Ranma and Ryouga exchanged toe-to-toe blows, punches, elbows and knees were aimed at vital points on each others bodies. Targets were the stomach, gut, chest, shoulders and kidneys. Neither attacked below the belt, however, neither wanting to be THAT harsh on another man.

"Screw this!" Ranma shouted, and willed his Ki into an object in hand. A dagger formed, handle in grasp, shimmering slightly, and Ranma aimed it straight for the bandanna that bound them both together. Both separated with a jump away, the time together letting them work out how the other fought when their life depended on it.

_Ryouga's strong. _thought Ranma._ Much stronger than I remember him being. He is taking more care of his attacks though, unlike last time I saw him. More accuracy is used, less of an all out offence._ Ranma smirked. _This is gonna be fun!_

_Shit, Ranma's fast! _Ryouga thought, still eyeing his opponent over, trying to work out what he'd do next. _I need him down on the ground, unable to move… Then I can punish him how I want._ Ryouga smirked. _It's time for some fun and games!_ Ryouga then charged forward.

Ranma vaulted over Ryouga, unleashing a Ki blast one-handed, a move similar to the one used on Kuno earlier. Ryouga, however, deflected the blast with his forearm. _Interesting.._ thought Ranma. _Is he wearing a Ki-infused bracer?_

Ranma landed behind Ryouga, and decided he may as well make the best of what was available. He sprinted forwards, hands pointed, ready to execute the move that he knew would have Ryouga on the floor. Hands darting at speeds hard for the untrained eye to follow, Ranma's pointed hands digged into Ryouga's back in various points, mostly focusing on the higher back and kidneys lower down – painful. But then again, the Anything Goes style was attack based, not like Judo, where you were aiming to have your opponent acknowledge defeat.

As the attacks digged into Ryouga, the bandanna-clad boy grunted in pain, falling to the ground. Ranma had increased in skill a lot more since their last encounter, no doubt. _The only thing that's keeping me in the fight is my stamina._ Ryouga thought, his mental voice wavering as he came to terms of the pain. However, he was a warrior. Ryouga would fight till he was knocked out – or worse.

Ranma smirked at the boy on the ground. "Is that all you got? Com'on! I thought you would be fun!"

Ryouga's eyes sparked as he got up and faced Ranma. The fire inside them was enough to unnerve most people. But Ranma wasn't most people. How many people do YOU know who change into a girl with cold water?

"SAOOOOOOTOOOMEEEEE!!!!!!" Ryouga screeched, deafeningly loud. A few dogs nearby barked, their howls echoing into the distance. The playing field had become deathly silent, so much so that you could feel the tension in the air, emanating from the two teenage warriors. One who was a new kid, the other looking like he'd arrived out of a bush or eight. Backwards. At speed.

The two martial artists jumped at another, meeting in mid-air. Those with the right angle and sharp enough sight could see Ranma grinning like a Cheshire cat, as he expertly blocked a blow and kicked Ryouga to the ground. As Ryouga landed, a small crater appeared around him. Shockwaves sent birds scattering into the skies.

Ryouga got back to his feet. _So,_ thought the lost boy, _he can fight hand-to-hand easy, and can even fire some sort of energy, but can he block from afar?_ Reaching to his forehead, Ryouga grabbed his bandanna, ripping away roughly eight near-identical bandannas as well. As they spun in his hand, they left after-images, eventually reaching enough velocity to become as sharp as a razor-blade. Unleashed in the direction of his foe, they travelled at a blinding speed, so fast even Ranma's trained eye had difficulty following them. The bandanna's left semi-visible copies of themselves as they travelled, giving the illusion there were many more than there actually were. The crowd gasped as they found their mark.

Ranma's arms, which had been raised to knock the bandanna's aside were now covered in many visible cuts and gashes, some merely red lines, others starting to bleed freely. Ranma looked at his arm, and grinned. "Oho, so we DO have some tricks up our sleeves now, eh?" Ranma darted forward. "You've shown me yours, now I'll show you mine!!"

Ukyou reached the backpack, and looked carefully at the gourd. The water seemed…murky, as if it had come out of a river or spring. _A..a spring? It couldn't be…_ Ukyou thought, her mind racing ahead of her proof. _No, it couldn't be. The odds are ridiculous. I might ask that Nabiki girl the odds of it, just to make sure._ Deciding that it was better safe than sorry, anyhow, knowing hers and Ranma's luck, she decided to hide the water from the yellow-clothed boy. He was pretty pissed off, and Ukyou didn't like their luck.

A crack of thunder from the skies caused Ukyou to shiver. Thunder meant rain. Rain meant being a man. Rain meant Ranma's attacker would discover the curses, and perhaps try to use them against the newlyweds. Without thinking, Ukyou stood up straight and shouted loud. "Ranma! Rain is coming!"

Ranma didn't hear. He was too busy blocking some flying objects. And Ranma had looked down at his arms. Was he…laughing?

However, Ukyou noticed there was still a projectile flying. And it was headed for…her!

Instincts taking over, she grabbed the bag by it's strap and held it in front of her, facing the gourd of water away from her. The razor-sharp projectile – which Ukyou could see was a bandanna – sliced away at the ties holding the bag together, causing the bulk to fall to the ground, leaving Ukyou holding two pieces of material.

_The gourd!_ Ukyou thought. _It'll smash!_ Making a mad lunge to stop the bag from smashing the gourd, Ukyou flipped it over, making the gourd land on the bulk of the pack, and not smashing.

_Phew…._ Ukyou sighed mentally. _That was a close one. I dread to think what's in there…_

Looking at the container, Ukyou noticed that the water was sparkling more than dirty-looking water would. It was enchanting… _What should I do with it?_

_Follow your heart._ Said a voice inside her.

_Ranma? _Ukyou thought.

_No, the other boy._ Ukyou frowned. How would that work? _This water is, indeed, special. And that boy is attacking your husband, the man you love._

Ukyou's eyes widened.

_Curse Ryouga! Let me FREE!!_

::::::::::::::

Ranma dashed forwards, holding his hands in front of him. A ball of energy formed between his palms and, as Ranma circled his arms around his head to gain momentum, he shouted the name of the technique. "Saotome Energy Blast: Fast Ball!" Releasing the ball of glowing golden energy, Ranma followed up with several Ki-charged fists, releasing the Ki as they reached their stretch, creating several fist-shaped Ki projectiles.

As the ball of energy hir Ryouga, the lost boy was thrown off his feet. Whilst still in the air, the Ki Fists struck him in the chest, gut and thighs. As Ryouga tried landing on his feet, the pain in his thighs screamed out, causing him to fall to his knees.

Ryouga snarled. "Hibiki School of Adaptation: Hand-Run!" Ryouga jumped off the ground with his knees and landed on his hands, proceeding to run – on his hands – towards Ranma. With the weight of his body off his legs, they were available for wild swings that would cause Ranma to back off whilst Ryouga prepared himself for his next attack.

Ranma smiled in appreciation of the lost boy's ingeneuity, and blocked a kick to his head. However, the leg span round the other way, meeting it's brother who was already heading towards Ranma's other side. With a full 360 degree spin, Ryouga's body had the power of two kicks heading towards an unprepared Ranma.

Ranma managed to block one kick, suprising the bandanna-clad boy, but he wasn't prepared for the second kick, which Ryouga adjusted enough to slip under the block – and strike Ranma directly in the guts.

Ranma flew sideways, landing on his shoulder. "That hurt, idiot!" Ranma winced as he moved his arm around, looking at the boy who was still standing on his hands.

"Saotome Final Attack: Rain Of Pain!!"

Ranma and Ryouga looked up. Ranma hadn't called out the attack. Heck, he wasn't even familiar with it!

Ukyou threw the gourd of water up into the air, mainly over the combatants heads. Mainly over Ryouga's. Ukyou ran to her husband and pulled an umbrella out – bamboo, and orange.

"Hey, that's my umbrella!" Ryouga shouted. "How did you get that!?"

"Look up, sugar." Ukyou said sweetly. Ryouga looked up, still on his hands.

And got splashed by the water that fell on him.

"Ucchan…was that Jusenkyo water? Knowing our luck, he'd come to curse us."

"It…it was, Ranchan. It spoke to me."

"Spoke? The water spoke to you? And if it's cursed water, why hasn't Ryouga changed yet?"

Ukyou looked at the lost boy. Indeed, he hadn't changed. The gourd had landed on his head, knocking him out. However, he caught conciousness a few seconds later.

Looking up at the couple under his umbrella, he opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again and spoke. "Hey…how did you two get my umbrella? I made that myself, there's no other one like it. Oh, god, what if some company saw it, claimed it was theirs and are making a fortune out of it!! That money should be mine!! Stupid corporations!!"

Ranma facefaulted. "He's…he's paranoid."

"Spring of drowned paranoid man… That's scary." Said Ukyou.

Ryouga was still ranting about how all the corporations were robbing the earth of it's resources, and there would be nothing left for future generations.

* * *

Notes:

Ugh. Took longer to write this chapter because I'm a slacker, and college started again for the new year. Eeeh. Can't complain, though. My money's back.

This chapter's longer than most others, too. I got caught up in the fight scene. ^^' And yes, Ryouga's adaptiveness technique is stupid. But when have you ever seen sane things happen in Nerima? =p

Reviews!!

**chm01**: Uhh...yeah! Whatever you said! Were you typing to yourself..? =p

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Nodoka will be soon. As you can probably tell, this isn't following the canon timeline too strictly. Same with Tarou.

**Slade2.0**: I can see where you're coming from with the whole 'leaving Ukyou out of the curses' thing, but I thought if anything, it'd help bond the couple even more. There can't be a couple anywhere else in the world who know what each other are going through, eh? And yeah, Ryouga's dumb. But ingenious. And fluff shall be around soon. It'll be so fluffy, it'll be like.... A BIG PINK FLUFFY THING! CALLED TERENCE!

**Dumbledork**: You DID read the past chapters, didn't you? Ryouga's pissed because he thinks Ranma killed his family. He's only just gotten cursed now. And the curse won't help in his belief that Ranma killed his family. =D

Well, that's that. Please C&C. And I promise to you all that I'll update more often, too. If your lucky, by the end of this week, even! Sometimes I forget I'm writing this... I'm that good! --glows in self-adoration--


	9. Ataru Takahashi' arrives

Ryouga sat in Saonji's, faced with the married couple he had come to kill. Well, one half of the couple, anyway.

After calming Ryouga down and explaining what had happened – it seemed that when he was paranoid, he entered a different state of mind. Coming out, he couldn't remember specific details of his time under the curse's influence. Apparently, he had protested a lot when his paranoid self was told that hot water would change him back. The word 'change' had hit a chord in Ryouga, and he physically stopped Ranma and Ukyou from hitting him with hot water. It was only after they got either side of him and struck together that Ryouga was hit.

Now sitting in Saonji's, Ryouga understood the true implications of his curse. That every time it rained, he'd be paranoid. Every time he swam, he'd be paranoid. Every time he used public baths, he'd be paranoid. It didn't make for easy thinking. At least he stayed a man.

When Ranma and Ukyou told him how the curse would work, Ryouga queried them, asking how they knew. The couple then decided to demonstrate their own curses. It was only fair that Ryouga knew he was in company. To know that every time he got hit with cold water, there were others out there, suffering like him.

Ukyou had gone first. She picked up a glass full of water, and poured it over her head. Instantly, her form got taller and broader. Her muscles became more defined, and her face became more square. The person now standing in front of Ryouga was, without doubt, a man.

Ranma then decided to join his wife/husband. Pouring another glass over himself, Ryouga gaped as Ranma's form shrunk. The hair seemingly faded into red, the clothes became baggier. However, the clothes only became baggier in the arms and waist. Ranma's ample chest had tightened the front of the red chinese shirt so much Ryouga had to pinch his nose to prevent his face exploding in red. A dribble escaped though, and Ranma-chan blushed.

"You… You're a woman." He said, intelligently. "H-how!?"

"Nyannichuan, the spring of drowned girl." Ranma-chan replied, her soprano voice causing Ryouga to stare even more in shock. _The curse is rather thorough. How badly will this paranoia one affect me..?_

"The body though? Where is that from?" Ryouga continued, his dark yellow eyes glazed over as the mind behind them tried to process all this information.

"We worked out that our cursed forms are mirror images of ourselves, just what we would have looked like if born a boy or girl." Ukyou-kun interjected. His tenor voice, quite low down also surprised Ryouga. "This is how I would have looked if born a boy and raised how I have been. The same with Ranchan."

"So…changing back… That just needs hot water?" Ryouga said again.

"Yup. It's gotta be warm enough for your skin to actually feel heated by it." Ranma-chan said. "Otherwise, you'll just stay cursed. It'll turn us back – well, for you, sane – until we're next hit by cold water."

Ryouga nodded. He needed time to think about this. He'd walk off somewhere – like that was hard – and find a quiet spot, and meditate. Only then could Ryouga truly feel he could understand the implications of what's happened.

The lost boy stood up. Bowing to the cursed couple, he turned to the door, finding it on his eighth turn. Halfway out the doorway, he turned to look back inside. Seeing Ranma-chan, he nodded. "I'll let you get away this time, Saotome. I need time to understand what's happened to me. When I come back, though, you'd better be ready. I shall avenge my family for what you did." Turning back outside, Ryouga hefted his pack to his left shoulder and headed out down the street. After turning round the corner at the end of the block, he disappeared. Nobody on the turning saw him, anybody trying to follow him would assume he could either run really fast or could turn invisible.

Ranma chan looked out of the doorway, gazing to the corner where her old friend had disappeared.

"Wait… What did I do to his family?"

::::::::::::::

The man calling himself Ranma Saotome walked down the streets of the unfamiliar town. Whereas in other towns, people would look and stare, in this town they didn't. It was as if a martial artist of his calibre was no big deal. That, or they were very good at disguising their stares here.

Walking through a small park, he observed a panda playing with a tyre, rolling it in his paws. Next to him was a sign. [Play with Mr. Panda! Only ¥500] the martial artist decided to take a small break, sitting on a nearby bench, watching the children with their parents beg to play with the panda. Many agreed, deciding it would be a nice thing if their child grew up to be an animal conservationist, others refusing, wondering where the panda's minder was.

Looking around, he caught sight of a familiar looking man wearing a grey Gi, running through some Katas in a small, secluded spot of the park. The martial artist's eye twitched. This man was…familiar. Tall, long hair, held himself powerfully, as if to say 'I can defend myself very easily. It is very likely I am more powerful than you. Pick a fight, and you could easily regret it.'

This was the man who gave the scroll to his father. This was the man who had destroyed his Dojo, by not even being there. This is the man…who killed…

-----------------------

"_This technique will help you get the money you need." The man in the grey Gi told his father, handing over a scroll. "This is VERY powerful. You must only use it when you need to. But also, this technique is not as it seems."_

"_Pah, I'll work it out. I am Atara Kumon, after all! I am the master of the Kumon Dojo, and against all odds, we are still going strong!"_

_By against all odds, it was against ALL odds. The Dojo was leaning towards the west, at a 60 degree angle. The laws of physics demanded it fall down. The laws of honour demanded it stay up. Honour won._

_Sitting near a support beam (of which there were many) was a small child, a white bandanna round his head. He played with a broken top, spinning it and seeing how far he could make the unbalanced toy fly away from him. As the top flew towards his father and the grey-Gi man, Atara turned round. "Ryu-Kun! We can restore the dojo! We can become strong again!"_

_Ryu laughed. The laughter was one of the few things that bought a smile to his fathers face. Ever since his sons birth, he had never really been happy. Ever since his wife, Chinatsu, died in childbirth, he'd never been the same. Nevertheless, he took the boy under his wing and taught him in the Kumon school of throwing. Ryu took to it like a fish to water, and quickly moved up the belts. By the time he was eight, he was a black-belt, third degree dan – The highest belts went. It was then that his father taught him the more advanced techniques of the school, including how to learn a move from a scroll. Something that later in life, Ryu would rely on heavily._

_After obtaining the scroll, Atara got to work._

_Three hours later, the dojo was in ruins. Atara was dead. Ryu since had left to find the mirror of the scroll._

_Ryu went to avenge his fathers death. His school's destruction._

_Ryu would kill the man known as Genma Saotome._

-----------------------

"Hey, you!"

Soun Tendo turned around. The person who had called out was looking at him. He didn't have a likeable expression on his face. The person was a teenager, dressed in a black vest with equipment around the shoulders. The pack on his back looked heavy, but the boy carried it as if it were nothing, like a turtle would it's shell. He had a white bandanna around his hea—

A white bandanna?

"Who are you?" Soun asked the boy.

The boy's face glazed over for a second, as if wondering what to say. Soun kept a straight face. _What is he thinking about? Why pause on a request for a name?_

Eventually the boy answered. "My name is… Ataru Takahashi. What is your name?" he said, a somewhat smug smile on his face.

"Soun Tendo, head of the Tendo clan. What is it you want?"

"Revenge!" Said Ataru. On those words, he flew forward. "FIERCE TIGER GATE OPEN BLAST!"

Soun was on the defensive immediately, struggling to block the sheer power that had hit his forearms. If he didn't know better, it seemed like the boy was trying to **rip** his defence apart. It was beginning to work.

::::::::::::::

Genma Saotome was sick of using his curse to gain money. All the little kids were pawing and punching him. It didn't hurt, but it was annoying as a cheese-grater to the nose.

"Fierce tiger gate open blast!"

Genma looked up. It couldn't be…

Looking around for the move, he saw it being excecuted by a teenaged martial artist. The victim – after all, anyone who was attacked with him were kicked in the face pretty hard – was none other than his old friend, Soun!

Genma hauled his panda body up, looking at the fight with pure interest. The boy was using the moves expertly. It's like he'd been using the moves his whole life.

A shiver ran down Genma's spine. Did that mean one of the scrolls was still out there? He thought it'd been burnt. He'd trusted Soun with that scroll. The school of Yama-sen-ken was dangerous, and Soun had only received it to pass onto his descendants. The Tendo branch of Anything-goes was rather weak in comparison to the Saotome, and Genma didn't want to see his friend attacked by someone who would overwhelm his defences. And so, Genma had given the scroll to Soun, so his friend could see how easy it was to destroy defence. With knowledge is power, and so, ever since, their sparring matches had been very unpredictable.

But for someone else to be using the violent school? That was worrying.

Watching the fight, he was glad to see Soun use his own techniques to get behind the boy, delivering a chop to the neck, knocking the boy cold. Genma decided to make his presence known.

Waddling over, he caught Soun's attention. [Tendo, who was that?]

"Saotome?" The panda nodded. "He called himself Ataru Takahashi. I think he's lying."

[Never mind that, how did he know the Yama-sen-ken?]

Soun's face paled. That was why he wasn't injured, or worse. Knowing the attacks, he'd been able to defend against a style that ate defences for breakfast, lunch and dinner. "Was that what it was? It did seem familiar."

The panda scribbled furiously on it's sign. The resulting message was hardly legible. [**WHAT'S IMPORTANT IS HOW HE LEARNT IT!**]

"I agree, Saotome. I do not know how he got his hands on the scroll."

[Scroll?] Genma rotated the sign. [You still have the scroll, right?]

"Yes, of cou—" Soun paled.

["Yes, of cou—"!? **WHAT DOES THAT MEAN!?**]

Soun blushed. "I may have…lent it to somebody…"

Genma fainted. _Damn. That's not good._ Thought Soun. _I'd better get him somewhere. How did that curse work again..? Ah._ Pouring some hot water on the panda, it was replaced with a fat bald man in a white Gi. Soun picked him up and headed for the Tendo Dojo. _Perhaps when Genma wakes up, we can have a game of Shogi._ Soun thought to himself.

* * *

Notes:

Aaaah. Chapter nine. Ninenineninenineninenineninenine!!!! Nine's a nice number. Not too obvious, not too ordinary...just a number that's...nice.

Sorry my updates are taking forever. I DO aim for each week, but life is hectic. The best thing to do (well, for me at least) is just find the time.

Well, onto the reviews.

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Right. A small confession, methinks. I have never read/watched Sailor Moon. I probably should, looking at all the crossovers there are. Give me the money people, and I'll go buy them. I'm poor.

As for characters appearing, I WILL be putting in cameo's from other series of whatever. As for Herb, he MAY show up. I'm unsure. All you can do is watch this space. Hinako? I'm considering it. One suggestion for you though: I know I offered reader influence earlier on, in deciding the name on Saonji's, but the best way to influence a story isn't to ask if people will appear. Leave that to the author. All I want is C&C.

**SithKnight-Galen**: Crappy curse? From who's perspective, yours or Ryouga's? I suppose Ryouga would find it crappy. But then again, life stinks. And if from your perspective, have you ever been paranoid? I have, and it's not nice. Paranoia is a curse in itself. For Ryouga to be able to control it with hot water is a blessing most sufferers would die for. And yeah, the fight was good, wasn't it..!

**DumbleDork**: Glad you like the idea. It took me the mental power of six gnats to come up with it. Clever gnats. And Ryouga? Homicidal? Whatever gave you that idea!?

**Slade2.0**: I'm glad you see my point in the curses. But please, such a crude suggestion!! How dare you suggest they would do that!? Ranma and Ukyou are both very fond of their masculinity and femininity respectivley. They'd consider themselves....honourless if they did indeed, "Bow-chika-wow-wow."

Well, that's it. But please, if your reading this, do review. I read in another story somewhere that reviews are an indicator of a good story. If you find this a good read, post a review. Even if it's just "Wow, great work" or "Nice", it counts. If you haven't got an account on , you can still review this. That's all I ask. Review the story.

Hell, if I get more than average reviews, I might feel motivated to update faster. And faster updates mean more for you, the reader. You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours. Or should that be "You comment on my stuff, I'll give you stuff to comment on...."? Oh, I dunno....

Much love, people!

SOTG


	10. Finding Ranma

Ranma and Ukyou sat in Saonji's. Ranma sitting at a table, Ukyou behind the griddle, serving customers. Both made small talk with the people eating around them. One topic that came about was their martial arts prowess that had been seen regularly since their arrivals. Many were interested and hoped the couple would help to protect the town. Others were worried. They thought that they would attract bad attention, and even though they were capable of looking after themselves, would they be able to look after others at the same time?

Ranma was sitting at a table not far from the door, eating an Okonomiyaki. Greeting new visitors and welcoming the frequent, he enjoyed socialising with the crowds. It bought him a sense of fulfilment and happiness. Some even turned to him for advice on family feuds, money issues and even relationships. Ranma replied honestly each time, and they were always thankful. The tips from those customers were always fairly generous.

However, Ranma didn't know what to say one day. That day, he'd had a confrontation with the Akane girl, that his father had stupidly tried to engage him to. The meeting wasn't pleasant.

"Hello, welcome to Saonji's. Oh, Hey. It's Akane, isn't it?" Ranma asked politely, as Akane Tendo walked in.

"Yes. Ranma, I need to talk with you." Her reply had been tense. Ranma decided to watch his senses, that girl had a mean uppercut.

"Sure. Sit down, what is it?"

"Your father."

Ranma groaned. What had the stupid panda done now? "What did he steal?"

Akane looked at him as if he was an alien. "What're you on about? He hasn't stolen anything. No, I came here to talk to you about the relationship your father and mine had."

"Oh? Well, I'm more than happy to talk, but you'd still better watch your possessions. He's rather money-hungry."

"Thanks…" Akane grunted. "Have you ever heard of the Yama-sen-ken?"

Ranma rested his elbow on the table, placing his chin in the support his palm provided. "No, I can't say I have. '1000 Mountains,' eh?"

"Yes. It seems that it's a very powerful fighting style that rips your defence apart. And there's someone running around, using it."

"Well, OK. I can't see why you think I should know that." Ranma said.

"Well, my sister, Nabiki, is very good at finding information. She looked into any martial artists using such a style. Several reports came back. She got a name."

"OK, I take it you want to tell me the name. What is it?"

Akane paused. "Are you sure you want to know? I don't think you'll be very happy."

It was Ranma's turn to pause now. What could she say that'd make him worry? If it was anybody that used to chase after Ukyou, he'd rip them apart. She'd had many suitors before they came to Nerima. "Tell me."

"This guy calls himself…Ranma Saotome."

"That's weird. I don't know any styles like that."

Akane's face hit the table, drawing a few stares, and Ranma a cautionary glance from Ukyou behind the counter.

"You idiot, there's someone out there calling himself Ranma Saotome!"

Ranma froze. "Are you telling me the truth, 'cause I swear to all the Kami that if you're not, I won't be happy."

"This isn't a joke, Ranma. There's somebody using a violent style pretending to be you. He's even destroyed Dojo's so as to get money to travel."

Ranma sweatdropped. This was bad. There were people out there looking for somebody with his name. Any inquiries would lead them here.

This wasn't good.

Ranma needed a plan of action.

::::::::::::::

Hitoshi Onodera and Susan Brown travelled through the cemetery in Tokyo's Minato ward, paying their respects. Their thoughts were with the dead. Hitoshi's were with whoever his parents were. Susan's with her brother, who had been killed in the American war in Vietnam by friendly fire. Danny Brown had been a private, of the same parentage as Susan. The soldiers on his team were not the brightest in the world, and they had mistaken his eastern asian appearance for the enemy. Susan was against war because of that. She wasn't against fighting though.

Leaving the cemetery, they took a train to the Nerima district. Inquiries had led them to a registry office where a Saotome and Kuonji had gotten married. After gaining the general area of where they lived, they asked no more, for fear of the office calling up this couple and telling them. They didn't want to give the bastards an early warning.

Arriving in Nerima, they started looking for a place to stay. Seeing a hotel near the train station, they booked in and left their stuff in their rooms. They then left and went to search. They agreed to meet back at the hotel at 8PM. The time now was ten to two. There were two towns in the ward that were active in chaos, so they decided to split up and check them out. Susan went to a town called Furinkan, Hitoshi to one called Tomobiki.

Splitting up, both had the same thoughts on their minds.

Find them kill them find them kill them find them kill them find them kill them find them kill them…

::::::::::::::

Soun carried Genma back to the Tendo Dojo. After placing him in a spare room to recover, he went downstairs to read the paper.

20 minutes later, Genma came downstairs. "Soun?"

"Ah, Genma, my old friend. Are you okay? You collapsed in the park."

"Yes..Yes, I'm fine. Just a small shock." Said Genma. "Say, why did I collapse again?"

Soun frowned. Was it wise to tell his friend of the details? Of how this boy had learnt the Yama-sen-ken?

Sighing, Soun decided he may as well. Genma had created the styles, he should be informed of who is using them - and how. "You found out that...1000 Mountains is still being used."

"Ah."

Soun remained silent, waiting for his old training partner to say something.

"How old is this person?" Genma asked finally.

"I'd say no older than 17 or 18. He's rather skilled. He nearly tore through my defence."

Genma sat down, cross legged, placing a fist underneath his chin. He stayed that way for 5 minutes. Soun started reading the paper again, unnerved. He could see the words in print, but he couldn't read them.

Genma scared Soun. No doubt the Saotome was a skilled martial artist, but to create two techniques - no, two SCHOOLS of techniques, just for....what he did. Soun stopped himself thinking. _Such memories are not fond. How would Kimi-chan feel if she knew your friend had made such dangerous styles? _

"What did the boy call himself?"

Soun snapped out of his reverie. "My apologies, Saotome. I believe he called himself 'Ataru Takahashi.'"

Genma cursed. No doubt it was a fake name. Takahashi was one of the most common family names in Japan, The number of Ataru's there would be with that family name would be...tiresome to track down. No, they would wait.

"We shall wait for this...Ataru," Genma spat the name, as if it was poisonous to his very being. "And we shall subdue him. If one of the schools has not been locked, it's twin shall not be either."

"What shall we do, Saotome?"

"It is not 'what shall we do,' more 'what shall **I** do?' You should never have allowed another person to set eyes upon that scroll." Soun quivered with fear. The powerful battle aura that Genma was creating was enough to scare demons.

"Nevertheless," Genma said, his aura fading now, "What has happened has happened. I shall teach my son and his wife the schools. They shall find this boy, and they will make him lock it away. Those schools should remain inclusive to Anything-Goes. If they do not, theives and robbers will learn them. This, I do not want."

Soun shook his head slowly. _But, Genma my dear friend, you created the schools to do just that. How can you stop others from performing what the schools were intended for?_

::::::::::::::

Shampoo screamed.

All the water, then the fire, then the dangling off a cliff.

It was too much.

Shampoo wanted no more.

_What can I do, though? For as long as I am an amazon, I must withhold the laws of the tribe. For as long as I am an amazon, I must do as the elders say. For as lo--_

"Of course..."

Shampoo smiled. She could win.

* * *

Notes:

Finally wrote number 10. YAY! A decade of chapters, in the non-timeline sense.

As you can probably tell, epic shit is gonna go down. During the writing of said epic shit, I may have major nervous breakdowns in trying to orchestrate the epic-ness that will happen. Hopefully, though, I'll manage with about 20 cups of tea, some beers and food on trays. Toilets? Pah! Toilets are for weaklings!

On a side-note, two things. One - My hard drive with all of my previous work has self-destructed. I now have to scrape it to recover everything - presuming I can. Wish me luck, it's 80GB and my machine is as slow as.

Two - I've started a side-project, posting as I write it, called Saotome Siblings. Find it on my profile page. Please review that, as well as this. It'll make me happy and want to write more.

Reviews!

**chm01**: Looking at this chapter, I'm not even sure "OH SHIT!" covers it.

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Yes, it was an original curse. I got the idea from smoking... various substances. As for Akane and Ranma's relationship, they've called a bit of a truce. I didn't explain it in this chapter, but as long as Ranma avoids changing in front of Akane, she won't hit him. Sounds a fair deal. Just avoid water when you're a water magnet. No problem at all!

**Slade2.0**: Funny? Perverse. More has come and more will come.

**DumbleDork**: I'm glad you find them interesting. =]

Well, that's all from me for now. Take care!

Much Love, SOTG.


	11. Training and Pure Dumb Luck

Genma walked through the streets of Furinkan with a purpose. Those foolish enough to get in the way of the bespectacled martial artist found themselves either pushed away, on the floor or buried in a wall. No amount of people would stop him.

Finally reaching Saonji's, he opened the door and strode in, looking for his son. The main restaurant was empty - it had closed for the evening - but Genma could hear a television playing upstairs.

Leaping up the staircase, he walked into the front room. "Ranma, Ukyou, I have something to tell you both."

Ranma groaned. "What have you done now, old man?"

"It's not what I have done, rather what others are doing." Genma stated. "There is a martial artist running around, calling himself Ataru Takahashi. He is dangerous. He is using a school of techniques that rip your defence apart before using deadly strikes. He is easily a killer, and I believe that he is after the founder and practitioners of the Saotome School of Anything Goes. In short, he is after everyone in this room."

A dead silence followed. Nobody spoke, nobody even seemed to breathe. It was one of those silences that seemed like nothing would penetrate, not even the television that was still on in the corner. A deathly white noise filled their ears, their brains trying to fill in for the lack of aural interaction.

"So..." Ukyou said, seated next to Ranma. "There's a powerful man out there, hell-bent on killing us?"

"Yes."

"And what do you propose you do about it?"

Genma paused before speaking again. _Should I really tell them? _He asked himself. _Yes. They have a right to know._ Replied another voice.

"The man calling himself Ataru Takahashi is using a style called Yama-Sen-Ken, or 1000 Mountains. It is a purely brute-force style. It also has a sister style, called Umi-Sen-Ken, 1000 Seas. I created both." Genma paused, allowing time for his words to sink in. "Somehow, he has learnt one of the styles. The Umi-Sen-Ken will defeat it, but I am the only practitioner. This is why I propose teaching you two 1000 Mountains and 1000 Seas."

"So, basically, you're too scared to fight this guy, and so want us to do so instead." Ranma said, his voice monotone.

Genma started sweating. "Not necessarily to those words, but yes. I saw him in action. He has mastered the school. They were meant to be locked away after I realised just HOW powerful they were. However, one has survived. This is why the Umi-Sen-Ken is being taught again."

"You're such an idiot." Ranma deadpanned. However, his eyes were agleam with the prospect of new techniques. As long as they weren't as bad as what Ukyou had to go through once.

"Training will begin immediately." Genma stated. He then slipped into an unfamiliar stance, holding his hands out in front of him, hunched back and a vacant expression on his face.

The atmosphere of the room changed dramatically. Genma seemingly disappeared, yet they could see him in front of them with their own eyes. However, their minds refused to believe, and gradually, Genma started to fade from sight. Only after demanding to see Genma did Ranma and Ukyou's minds see him solidify again, but only just.

"What the hell is this, old man!?" Ranma shouted. "What's going on!?"

"This is the Umi-Sen-Ken." Genma said, his mouth moving, but his voice seemingly coming from all around. "The art of subtlety. How can you fight what you can't see?"

"By sensing their location through their presence, of course." Ukyou said. "All decent martial artists can do it."

"Very well, Ukyou, try and find me." Genma said, completely fading from vision now.

"What on earth...?" Ukyou started. She couldn't sense her father-in-law's location anywhere! It was as if he'd erased his presence. Suddenly, her senses spiked. _Behind!_

Ukyou shot her elbow backwards, expecting to hit something. What she didn't expect was for her to hit nothing, and the force of her attack's momentum to swing her round, making her lose balance. Genma then materialised behind her and poked her in the back of the head with his little finger, pushing the Okonomiyaki chef over the edge. "Timber."

Ukyou fell in an undignified manner, landing on her front, causing her breasts to impact the unexpected floor, only to then be pressured with her own bodyweight. "AAH!"

"Ukyou!!" Ranma shouted. Suddenly, however, Genma appeared in front of him. "Not now, old man!" Ranma shouted, aiming a punch for his father's face. It was swiftly blocked.

"And this," Genma said, taking a forward stance, his presence in the room now back. "Is Yama-Sen-Ken. HEY, LOOK! FOOD!" Genma shouted, pointing over Ranma's shoulder.

Ranma turned around before realising halfway through his turn it was a trick. Suddenly, he found his normal defences ripped apart, his arms literally forced to his sides, while his portly father kicked him in the chest with enough force to knock a wall over. Ranma found himself embedded in one.

Genma stood up straight, now not attacking. "This is all I shall show you. I consider even that too much to show, but you must pick up on the techniques I used, and develop more for the style. Ukyou, you will learn Umi-Sen-Ken. Ranma, Yama-Sen-Ken. They are both equally balanced, but to defeat this man, you must both use your attacks together. Blend the schools with your own unique styles, and this 'Ataru' will be history."

Genma then left the room, leaving Ukyou to pick herself up, wincing in pain and discomfort, before helping dig Ranma out of the wall.

::::::::::::::

Ryouga was lost, again. However, he didn't care. He was more preoccupied in not getting hit with water. The curse was ridiculous; it seemed that ever since that initial splash of water that ruined his sanity, water of any kind would find him. He'd lost his mind more and more often since he'd been cursed. No doubt his impairment was greater than Saotome's. At least he remained sane!! Pah, knowing him, he's probably being perverted in that female form. And as for his/her wife/husband, they were probably trying every trick in the book. Perverts.

Ryouga focused back on where he was. The thick forest he had appeared in was damp, dark and quiet. A bit too quiet. Ryouga's senses were picking up every slight sound. A rustle of leaves a few yards to his left, or right, he never knew which, made him jump. Landing in a defensive stance, only to see a small rodent running away.

_Feh,_ he thought. _It seems like the curse is affecting me without me being splashed. Hah, let's hope that never happens, touch wood._ The last part of the thought was accompanied with Ryouga's palm resting on the bark of a tree. _Knowing my luck, this tree is probably some magical tree that will grant wishes. Feh, I almost hope it is!_ Ryouga laughed a little under his breath. _Such a thing is a story, from those western fairy tales that my mother used to read me._

The dark of the forest wasn't as dark any more. It was illuminated slightly, with a strange pulse of red and green. Ryouga dismissed it. Whenever he thought about his parents, he always seemed to glow. He didn't know why, but it was useful in the dark.

However, this time, it seemed a bit odd. When Ryouga walked on to find civilisation, the glow didn't follow him. Instead, it seemed to stay around the tree Ryouga had been standing next to.

Ryouga turned. Was this possible? The tree was glowing!

"_What? Hello? Is this thing on..?" _A strange, ominous voice came from the tree, echoing, but also having a slight echo before it. Almost as if the words were being said before they were said. _"Is anybody there? Ye Gods, just my luck. I finally get summoned and the summoner has already left. Hello!? Anybody there?"_

Ryouga stared at the tree. His jaw hung loosely as he stared at. The. Talking. Tree.

The. Talking. Tree.

The tree was talking!!

"_If anyone is there, say something! I can't see anything, just hear!"_

"Uhhm… Hi." Ryouga stumbled. What were the formalities in a situation like this? Should you bow towards a tree? It had said itself that it couldn't see, so would it make a difference?

"_Ah! At last! Someone is there! Quick, touch the bark again!"_

Ryouga did so. A peculiar feeling ran down his arm, and suddenly the voice was in his head, as well as outside.

"_Much obliged, my dear boy. Ah, Ryouga, is it? Are you schizophrenic?"_

"Uhh, what? I don't know that word." Ryouga stood still, wondering what the weird voice actually was. Was it a demon? And how did it…

"How do you know my name?" Ryouga asked, slightly worried now.

"_Isn't it obvious?" _The voice said, both in his ears and head. _"I'm channelling a link between us through your arm. You placing your hand on my bark allows me to make a temporary subconscious connection between our mental states. Through this, I'm able to read the most prominent thoughts on your mind. One thing held in most people's head is their own name, so that's the first thing I looked for. I also know you are 16 years old, know what you look like and that you have a very close friend called Ra—Oh, wait. You want to kill this Ranma character, don't you?"_

Ryouga lost the tree when it was talking about taking some bizarre travel system called Subconscious when in the American state of Mental. However, he got back on the ball when Ranma was mentioned. This time, Ryouga glowed red and green. The tree voice yelped. _"Yow, not so much! You'll fry me inside out!"_

"S…Sorry." Ryouga said, shamefacedly.

"_It's quite alright, Ryouga, my boy. You summoned me from a sleep of who-knows-how-how-many Eons. I can forgive. Now, anyway, talking of summoning, you summoned me. Do you know what that means?"_

"Uhh, no, not really. How did I summon you, anyway?" Ryouga replied. He felt a bit of a fool, to be honest. He had a hand against a tree and was talking to it. A glowing, talking tree, no less.

"_Well, you touched me and then thought about wishes. I'm a wishing tree. Got a wish? Or several? You get a maximum of five wishes from me. You don't even know my name, do you? It's a bit complicated, so just call me Kodama."_

"Kodama... OK. What sort of wishes do you grant?" Ryouga asked, his eyes lighting up. Could he perhaps rid his curse? Or cure his directional sense?

"_Any. As long as they don't interfere with Fate. He's a nasty bloke, assigned me to a tree in the middle of nowhere. Can't complain, though. I'm able to stretch my legs every millennia or so. A bit like now."_

"So… What sorts of wishes interfere with Fate?" Ryouga asked.

"_Oh…just ones that involve having another entity being killed, resurrected, disfigured, land masses changing, roles like royalty and presidency placed upon a person and stuff like that."_

"What about curses?"

"_Depends on the curse."_

"I have a curse on me which changes my mind when I get splashed with cold water."

"_Let me have a look," _Kodama said. A small tingling went up the arm attached to the wood. _"Hmm, a Jusenkyo curse. Interesting. The problem is with Jusenkyo curses is they're very strong. I could probably break it, but it'd take about a year. And it'd probably be very painful, too. But the important word is Probably. Jusenkyo curses are fateful, too. You might have been destined for this."_

Ryouga wilted. Perhaps he'd have to learn to live with this. But there was still a little hope…

"I also seem to get lost all the time. Is there any way of fixing that?"

"_Again, I'll have a look." _Kodama said again. The tingling came again, but it was almost immediately followed by a burning white pain. Ryouga gasped. It was as if tens of dozens of white-hot pokers had been shoved into his arm at random. The pain was excruciating, even though it lasted barely a second.

"_Oh, dear God! That was…something else." _Kodama said, it's voice panting slightly. It seemed to have a gender-neutral voice, but when Ryouga thought about this, it seemed to turn more male. Kodama was a guy.

"What happened?" Ryouga asked, still breathless from what happened.

"_Your sense of direction… Before I begin, you need to think of the human mind as a computer." _Kodama ignored Ryouga's confused whine and ploughed on._ "I went into the root, the folder called 'Base Skills', then 'Navigation.' I then got blasted back, like there was a bomb behind a door holding it in, and I just opened it."_

"OK, I think I need time to think about these wishes. However, I DON'T want to stay next to a glowing tree for the foreseeable future. Is there any way you can come with me?" Ryouga said, wanting to get away.

Kodama paused before replying. _"Yeah, I think so. Have you got anything made of wood on you?"_

"Will my bamboo umbrella do?"

"_Perfectly. Hold it against my trunk."_

Ryouga did so, and saw a soft white light pass through the bark of the tree, enveloping the umbrella before sinking in to the wood of the orange umbrella. "You in there now, Kodama?" Ryouga asked.

_{Yup. I'm in here. Don't worry about this voice, I'm just using the remains of that link I said about earlier. It'll fade though. You'll have to hold a wooden part of the umbrella to talk to me, and vice-versa. If I want to say something though, I'll glow a little. You'll either notice the light or feel the heat.}_

"OK, that's fair enough. Lets go. I don't know where." Ryouga said, finger outstretched in a completely random direction, and then headed forward on a completely different bearing.

_{I'm going to have my work cut out with you, aren't I? Don't speak out loud to me, either. I can hear your thoughts when we're connected.}_

_My paranoid self won't like that. _Ryouga thought to Kodama.

_{Yeah, well, he'd better get used to it.}_

_

* * *

_

Notes:

Sorry for the delay, people. There's been a lot of snow in Britain lately, and it's kept me occupied. That, and my computer lost a hard drive when I was replacing a different one. Now I don't have Microsoft Word on there. I've been using Wordpad. Yeah! Old school!

A few tidbits: Kodama is an actual tree spirit. And it's Japanese, so it makes a bit of sense. For more information, whack "Kodama" into Wikipedia. He's appeared in other places too. There's even a helpful picture of him and his kind! =P

Reviews!

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Foreshadowing is one of the greatest things ever to be used. Without it, there would be no action films, thriller books or horror games. God, I love horror games.

**DumbleDork**: No, he won't. That's why I'm going to have as much fun writing it as you will reading it!

**chm01**: Yes. Indeed.

**Slayer2.0**: They will get interesting, yes. And hopefully, my updates will become more and more frequent.

That's all for now. More soon. And, please, I know more people read this than the reviews say. That's why I ask each and every one of you to leave a comment, no matter how mundane. Anonymous reviews is ON, so even if you don't have an account on this site, you can leave a review. Please tell me what you think. It motivates me, and more motivation means more writing.

Anyway, until next time...

Much Love, SOTG.


	12. Unwind From A Hard Day, Nerima Style

Find them, kill them, find them, kill them, find them, kill them, fi--

"DARLING!!"

*ZAPPP*

"Now look what you did, Lum, you struck another passer-by AGAIN!!"

"Stop chasing skirt, Darling, and maybe it won't happen!!"

_Ugh, why didn't I take Furinkan?_ thought Hitoshi.

::::::::::::::

The Tendo household was never quiet. There was always the crushing of cinder blocks to fill the silence that would have otherwise filled the air. While the neighbors didn't appreciate the constant crashing, they appreciated the fact that the girl doing it was doing so as to be able to defend herself and others. Hopefully, it would never happen to them, but there was no denying the fact that shit happens.

The girl in question, Akane Tendo, was working her stress out. Earlier that day, that pervert Ranma and his wife had changed genders again! It was disgusting! The fact that they could, indeed, peep at themselves disgusted her to the core. What added insult to injury was that the pervert had then tried MARRYING HER! What was he trying to do, build a harem?

Next thing you know, he'll be getting pretty foreigners to fall for him. Disgusting.

"Akane!" A voice drifted from the house. "Dinner's ready!"

"Coming, Kasumi!" Akane called back. Quickly, she swept away the rubble of her training and ran up the stairs to her room, changing out of her martial arts Gi and into something more appropriate for dining. A few minutes later, she came back downstairs to sit in her regular spot at the table, snapping her chopsticks apart before dining on the meal her elsest sister had served her up as she changed. General table chatter ensued, as the family discussed their stories of the day, the current news item or their problems they want advice on. The dining table always had been a social place in the Tendo household. Unfortunately, sometimes discussions take a path not everyone is comfortable with. Normally it's Nabiki, when the conversation moved to money, and the Tendo Dojo's lack of it. Today, it was Akane's turn.

"So," Nabiki said, snapping her own chopsticks and digging in to her food. "What do you think of that couple at school, Akane?"

"Which one?" Akane asked. "There are a lot of couples at the school. Sometimes they go between schools, because there's Kagome in my class, who's going out with some guy from Kolkhoz High. I think his name's Mikado Sanzezin. He's apparently a bit of a womanizer. What a pervert."

"No, I'm on about Ranma and Ukyou, also in your class." Nabiki said, smiling. "Married and everything, isn't it unique? So young and already trapped together. Such a shame. That Ranma's quite a catch. Your friend, Yuka, tried getting him, didn't she?"

Akane started radiating an intense amount of heat. Her father, Soun, could immediately see that his daughter was producing the most powerful raw battle aura he'd seen in quite a while. The raw power was vibrating the air around it, producing a supersonic sound not audible to humans. However, a dog a few blocks away started howling. Soun sweatdropped.

Nabiki, oblivious to what she was doing, kept going. "Was Yuka okay after what Ranma did to her? After all, Ranma's quite the cow when she's angry."

The reminder of Ranma's perversion caused Akane to go over the edge. The dog stopped barking in the distance.

_The calm before the storm._ Soun thought.

"Yuka was...okay." Akane answered slowly, clearly trying to hold back her anger. What Ranma had done that day was almost out of her memory, and trust Nabiki to bring back memories not wanted.

"Hmm, yeah. I'd hope so." Nabiki continued. The tension in the air had changed to such a degree, those that were extremely sensitive to emotions would run a mile before purging themselves in any way necessary.

"Sis...Can we...Can we not talk about them?" Akane said, voice faltering in anger and annoyance.

"Whyever not?" Nabiki asked, genuinely confused.

"Ranma and I..." Akane said, pausing halfway through. "We aren't on the best of terms."

"That's not what I've heard. Why, I heard that you went into the restaurant he and his wife own. Saonji's, isn't it?"

"How do you know that?" Akane said, shocked. "You were here, at home! Reading manga in your room!"

"Eyes and ears, Akane." Nabiki said cryptically. "I have them all over the place. Why did you go in, anyway?"

"I had to deliver Ranma some news." Akane said, telling the truth. "It was important."

"Did you charge him for it?" Nabiki asked.

"Sis, I'm not as money-obsessed as you. And this isn't information you sell. As a martial artist, it's my duty to help protect others."

Soun smiled happily.

"Pardon me, sis," Nabiki said, interrupting Akane. "But isn't Ranma a highly accomplished martial artist himself? Surely he could look after himself."

"I considered it my duty to tell him, so as he can prepare himself fully."

"Ah, my daughter has got such a fine sense of honour. Oh, we'll make a proud fighter out of you yet, Akane!" Soun wept. The meal in front of him was suddenly waterlogged.

"Daa---aad!" Akane moaned. "I'm already a proud martial artist! I can hold my own!"

"Oh, my sweet daughter!" Soun wept again. "Such a fine sense of modesty!"

::::::::::::::

The man known as Ryu Kumon, Ataru Takahashi and Ranma Saotome walked though the streets of Furinkan. His defeat at the hands of that man was bitter in his mouth, and he vowed to destroy the man.

However, he would have to make camp somewhere. He didn't have enough money to book a hotel room and eat, only enough to eat. He'd have to...aquire some more. Instead, he pitched his tent in an abandoned lot. After cooking some food, he went into a typical Kata of the Kumon School of Throwing. His graceful movements were fluid, flowing from one to the next. It was hard to tell where one move ended and the other began. And when he moved into a fresh Kata, it was no different. Those with no knowledge of Katas would think that they were simply dancing one long, elaborate dance, alone with no music except the sounds of birds and traffic.

Finally finishing the kata, Ryu prepared his food, ate and went inside his tent.

Twenty minutes later, the tent exploded.

Anyone standing within the blast site who had not been blown away would have heard a gruff tired voice mutter: "Damn nightmares."

::::::::::::::

_{Take a right. NO, THAT'S LEFT!}_ Kodama shouted inside Ryouga's head.

_Shut up, you tree! It's not my fault I'm eternally lost!_ Ryouga shouted back in his head.

_{I realise that, Ryouga. But why do you want to get to this town anyway?}_

_The town of Furinkan is where Ranma is. I wish to destroy him!I_

Kodama sighed, even though he had no lungs or mouth to blow air with. _{OK, I understand that, but have you ever thought why he always defeats you?}_

_**HE GOT LUCKY! **_Ryouga shouted back. He earned himself a headache for his troubles.

Suddenly, the heavens opened. Thunder ripped through the air, whilst forked lightning seared across the sky, striking an unfortunate tree, setting it alight. The flames were soon extinguished by the rain that accompanied the storm.

"Aw, great!" Ryouga whinged. He quickly pulled his umbrella off the top of his pack. "Sorry, Kodama. You're gonna get a little wet!"

_{Oh, yeah, don't mind me. I'm just the umbrella. Rain protection and fighting tool extraordinaire! Seriously, do you know how many bruises I have in here? Eighty-Six! I counted! And that's just from the wildebeest last week!}_

"Well **sorry**, Kodama! Is it so wrong to protect myself?"

_{Yes, it is to use me as a battering ram.}_

"I summoned you. My way or the highway."

_{Good song, just cause you summoned me don't mean that I have to do exactly what you say. Do you want an example?}_

"Hah, I'd love to see what you can do!"

_{Very well. You asked for it.}_ Kodama said, a hint of regret in his voice.

The bamboo umbrella promptly snapped shut, allowing the rainfall to land upon Ryouga.

"Oh, great. So it rains on me. Thanks a lot, Kodama.

_{Quite welcome.}_

"AAH! VOICE IN MY HEAD, VOICE IN MY HEAD!!"

_{Oh, shut up already, and follow my directions! I'll get you to Furinkan, where there's hot water and Ranma. You're going to have to get used to me talking to you like this eventually, you know. I can talk through the umbrella, but it's not easy. And it's impossible in the wet. It'd sound like I'm drowning.}_

"Great. Paranoid, with a voice in my head, no family, a cocky tree spirit and wet clothes. I could die of hypothermia! Shit, I have to get warm!!" Ryouga screamed, beginning to run in a random direction.

_{Oh, great. Wrong direction, again. Can this day get worse?} _A lightning bolt ripped across the sky, followed by an incredibly loud boom of thunder, which gradually rippled away to leave the ears of every being within a couple of miles ringing. _{Yup, it easily can. Why do I have to tempt Fate. Why can't he just leave me alone, for once. Why have I got the luck to be summoned by a half-insane boy who switches minds every time he gets wet?}_

More thunder, more lightning. To most people, they were normal thunder and lightning. To Kodama, the lightning sneered at him, whilst the thunder ebbed away in such a pattern, he could have sworn that the very air around him laughed.

_{Cheers, Fate. I'll buy you a glass of water sometime.}_

The rain increased, and Ryouga kept running, afraid of getting lost, while getting lost due to being afraid.

::::::::::::::

"Ranma..." Ukyou cooed softly. "It's been a long day of hard training. I think we both deserve a bath together..."

Ranma stopped midway through his Kata, looked at his wife, who was already wrapped inside a bathrobe, and grinned. "I quite agree, Ucchan." he said softly. "Pop's gone to the bar, we're all alone for the night. I'll collect him in the morning. Tonight, we can both unwind from our strenuous days." He said all this whilst moving closer to his beloved, eventually wrapping his arms around her slim form and pulling her closer, before brushing his lips against hers for a fraction of a second - a hint of what could be expected that evening.

Ukyou grinned like a madwoman, and promptly dragged her husband into the bedroom to 'help' him undress.

* * *

Notes:

Another chapter, another delay, another excuse. My one this time is that it's half-term, I don't have college, and I have a spare amount of cash. I only need to say one thing to make you all unerstand what I mean. Beer. I've been enjoying myself ever since Saturday, and it's stopped me fro getting this chapter out sooner than I would like. I aim for weekly updates, y'see. Anybody got any good advice to get me writing more without giving up my bottles of Becks Vier?

Nevertheless, I remember somebody asking for more RanXUk fluff. I provided, with interest. I'll let your minds do the rest, I'm not going further without a wad of money. Cash.

A bad thing that happened whilst writing this is I ran out of swiss chocolate. Bad times...

Enough of my moaning! Reviews!

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Yes, that is all Genma does. Punch. "Now, m'boy, work out how I did it. I'm off to the pub." Good father? That's up to you. At least he's teaching Ranma something. It's just that he likes to get drunk afterwards. And yes, Ryouga has a tree spirit with him. A tree spirit with a history....

**chm01**: Kijin Raishu Dan? That vacuum blade thing? It will make an appearance, but I'm not saying where. And by all means, do ask questions. It's good for me to answer them, and it also gives me an excuse to provide sneak-peeks. =]

**Slade2.0**: You didn't read it? Too bad. If you can, pick up Volume...uhh... OK, a tip to other writers: Keep your reference material to hand. I can't find the volume now, but I'm pretty damn sure it's volume 26, of the Viz publications. A good read. Ranma kicks ass. And did I make references to --cough-- bow chika wow-wow in the last chapter? I looked it over, and couldn't see anything. You must be like Happosai. Perving at anything. And don't start going into detail of Ranma and Ukyou going to wash. The fact that I wrote it means I already know! Keep it to yourself! =P

**DumbleDork**: Interesting ideas, I bloody hope so. I came up with them, so they should be interesting. And don't forget, Kodama has limitations. See Chapter 11 for a small list of them. There's more to Kodama than he lets on...

**Pryde Kitty**: Yes. Yes, they are heating up now. Soon, you'll shit bricks.

Well, that's me done. I'm going to sit back, have a cup of tea and listen to drum and bass now. Until next time, goodbye.

Much Love, SOTG.


	13. Ryouga Vs Ranma II

Small animals scattered at the sound of a large thing crashing through the undergrowth. Birds left the trees, and a loud voice uttered in Japanese: "Where the hell am I now!?"

The boy in black and yellow didn't speak for a second. Instead, he seemed to be listening intently to his surroundings. A passer-by would have seen him and thought he was just a standard fighter, camping out in the woods. A more educated person would see that he could easily stop a bus with his fingers. Waves of energy rolled off him, invisible and inaudible. The only people who would know what it was, and be able to see it, hear it or even smell it were people who also radiated their own energy.

The energy was Ki. The life-force of every living thing in the world. Most people used it minimally, just enough to keep that spark of life, that impossible-to-recreate _thing_ that made a person live. Some people, however, were able to harness such a thing. They trained their bodies and minds to morph and mould the untraceable force into something that would benefit them. It didn't always have to benefit others.

Some were fighters. Some healers. Some were spiritual, and some were…different.

Right now, Ryouga Hibiki felt like none of those. He did feel lost, though, and loathe as he was to admit it, he was also scared.

Ryouga sighed. "I hope you're right, Kodama. I'm due to end up somewhere soon."

Deciding he may as well make camp, he took off his pack. A few minutes later, Ryouga's tent was erected with practiced ease. Settling in, he grabbed his umbrella, and said: "What should I make tonight, then?"

_{How about a simple stew? The ingredients are all around, within eyesight of your tent. No problem getting them without getting lost.}_

"Sounds good." Ryouga said, seemingly to thin air. He was really conversing with the spirit inside his orange bamboo umbrella, Kodama. A tree spirit who Ryouga summoned by accident and now has five wishes available to him. Unfortunately, the wishes wouldn't be able to cure his directional sense, or Fateful Happenings.

Collecting the ingredients, Ryouga made his meal. Eating it in silence, he then turned in for the night.

The next day, Ryouga packed up, walked out of the woods and found himself in the grounds of Furinkan High School. The students were already coming in for their lessons, anxious to finish off the term without too much trouble. Some were waiting for friends, others were having an impromptu game of Soccer before lessons started.

Ryouga walked onto the concrete playground, drawing stares of attention that Ryouga didn't like. His accursed directional sense often gained him unwanted attention. He was just glad it wasn't America. Ugh, that Detective Inspector was annoying. DI Grant Arnolds was always trying to detain him, and simply because Ryouga had wandered into the White House completely by accident. Damn good for nothing curse. He'd have to see why it was the way it was.

Suddenly, a ruckus erupted by the front gates. Turning in the direction of the commotion, Ryouga saw two figures running over a fallen body. Ryouga immediately ran towards the downed man, wondering if the person was all right. It was only then he saw the red shirt.

"Yo, Hibiki!" the boy in the shirt shouted.

"Saotome, prepare to die!!" Ryouga screamed. The person in red was none other than Ranma Saotome, closely followed by his wife Ukyou Saotome. Both were accomplished martial artists, and whilst Ukyou would provide a challenge for Ryouga, Ranma would trounce him each time with his superior speed and strength-sapping attacks in rapid succession.

Nevertheless, the lost boy ploughed on. It was only when the back of his neck heated up did he realise Kodama had something to say. Reaching back, holding the handle of his customized weapon, he entered a mental conversation with the spirit.

_What is it, Kodama. I'm busy._

_{Oh, nothing. Just that I can see he's much more powerful than you. The chances of you defeating him are very slim. When you say that he got lucky, it's more that you got lucky he didn't obliterate you.}_

_Shut up, Kodama. I can beat him!_

_{Ryouga No Baka!} _Kodama said, insulting the lost boy. _{It would be obvious to a blind monkey that this guy could defeat you. If you really want to defeat this guy, you'd better seriously re-think your tactics. Rushing In all guns blazing isn't a good strategy.}_

_I hate guns. How else do you expect me to defeat him?_

_{You tend to just follow your attacks through. Try making a lunge, then attacking in another direction.}_

_­­_

"Maybe…" Ryouga uttered aloud.

Ranma had already charged up a blast between his hands, and was making the motions of throwing it towards the lost boy. Ryouga summoned his Ki and ran it into the clothes along his forearm. _Iron Cloth!_

The golden ball with a tint of blue rushed towards Ryouga at near the speed of sound, ripping the air in front of it apart with an ear-destroying scream. Ryouga bought his forearm up to intercept the blast – and knocked it off course.

"Jeez, I really have to know how you're doing that, Ryouga!" Ranma said.

"It's something you will never know!" Ryouga replied.

Ryouga reached up towards his forehead, and ripped off a bunch of identical tiger-stripe bandannas. Sending his Ki into the bandannas, they snapped solid, the edges of the cotton razor sharp. A split-second later, they were spinning in his hands and flying towards Ranma like shurikens. Using the cover of the deadly headwear, Ryouga dashed forwards, closing in on his opponent. Ranma deflected each of the spinning cloths with his forearm, gaining small nicks and scratches. They'd be gone by lunchtime.

Ryouga jumped forwards, adding to his already considerable momentum, and aimed to kick the pig-tailed martial artist in the chest. However, Ranma saw the move, grabbed Ryouga's leg and planted his own foot in Ryouga's face. The impact was enough to send Ryouga back the way he came, ploughing him into the ground. The crater would be filled in overnight.

Getting back up, Ryouga charged again, but instead, he followed Kodama's advice. Making out as if to strike at the boys gut, he quickly dropped to his hands and did a leg-sweep. Ranma didn't jump in time, and landed on his side. A normal man would have broken his pelvis.

Ranma wasn't normal.

Instead he jumped back up as if nothing had happened, and proceeded to punch Ryouga with devastating speed. The punches were many a second, faster than you could see. Most video cameras wouldn't have seen anything, not even those with a fast shutter speed. It was literally a blur.

Ryouga stumbled. The force of the blow had caught him off-guard. The leg-sweep didn't seem to affect the pigtailed martial artist.

Ryouga pulled his umbrella off his pack, still on his back. _Sorry, Kodama,_ he thought.

_{Oh, no, by all means. Do, please, I beg you, use me as a weapon against somebody more skilled than you.} _Kodama replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

_Now you ARE in for it, you stupid tree!_

Ryouga opened his umbrella and threw it towards the Heir to the Saotome School. Ranma dodged easily.

"Is that all you got, lost boy!?" Ranma taunted. Ryouga bristled. To defeat him in battle was bad enough. To insult him for what he had little or no control over? Unacceptable.

"Shut up, crossdresser!" Ryouga shouted back. Perhaps if he kept Ranma occupied…

"What're you going to do about it, eh?" Ranma replied, taking a relaxed stance and crossing his arms. "What can you do to make me shut up? Nothing! Hey, here's an idea, why don't you try defeating me in combat!?"

Ryouga really got angry then. Screaming his battle cry, he ripped off more bandannas and sent them as shurikens towards Ranma, making the deadly cloth strike the aquatransexual from the front and to the sides. Ryouga then jumped up into the air and flew towards Ranma with his foot placed firmly forwards, ready to literally kick the head off the Anything Goes practitioner.

Ranma saw the bandannas. He saw the flying kick. All left him one easy escape route.

Ranma jumped backwards, and met the heavy bamboo umbrella flying back towards it's owner in the small of the back, directly between the kidneys. The force of the blow made Ranma fly forward again. The bandannas struck their mark, creating loads of small gashes and scratches all over his torso, and then Ryouga landed on Ranma's head. And continued to the ground.

Ryouga retrieved his umbrella and picked up his bandannas. The pigtailed boy would be out for the count for a while. Without so much as a backwards glance, he headed for the main gate. Somebody stopped him.

She was cute. Long hair, typical dress for the school… She also had a rather odd look on her face.

"What's your name?" she asked.

Ryouga was taken aback a bit by the bluntness of the question. "Uhh… Ryouga Hibiki. Can I help you?" he replied. _And what do you want from me?_ He also thought.

_{Only one way to find out.} _said Kodama.

"My name is Akane Tendo." The girl said. "The boy you just beat up, Ranma Saotome—"

"Is a cruel, heartless piece of scum. Trust me, if you want your life to not get royally screwed, don't go near him."

"Trust ME, I don't plan on it." Akane replied. "You know what that sicko tried doing? Marrying me, when he already has a wife! And she's not even that good a looker, either. Feh, look at her, fawning over him…"

Ryouga turned around to see what Akane was on about. Indeed, Saotome's wife was there. And Ryouga couldn't see what was wrong with her, apart from being associated with the Parent Killer.

"I mean, she's got the flattest chest out of anyone in the school!" Akane continued. "What do they see in each other? One's a big-headed moron who thinks he's God, the other's the single most unattractive person I've ever seen!"

Ryouga chuckled softly. "Perhaps. But I suppose there isn't really anyone else they could get apart from each other. They're perfect. They're a bit like bodyguards when they're together as well. Big headed and unattractive."

Akane laughed hard. "I suppose you're right. Where do you live?" she asked casually.

Ryouga paused. _Kodama, little help? I don't want to say I live in a tent!_

_{Tell her the truth. You live in a tent. Trust me, some good could come of this.}_

"I, uhh, kinda like, don't have a home. Well, I do, I just don't know where it is. So I don't. I camp in the wilderness, really." Ryouga said, tripping over his own words. He blushed a little as well.

Akane giggled. "Say, why don't you come stay at my house for a while?" she asked, honestly.

Ryouga was on the floor, a pool of blood leaking from his nose. Whether it was because he'd knocked it against the ground was unclear. "Wh-What!?"

"Seriously, come stay at mine. I'm sure Daddy wouldn't mind. It's a Dojo, too, so at least you'll be able to practice. My daddy owns the Dojo, too. You two could spar."

_{What did I tell you? A bed to sleep in, a table to eat at, company to enjoy! Don't look a gift-horse in the mouth, Ryouga!}_

"Sure, why not." Ryouga said. He'd have to have words with Kodama later. It was almost as if the tree was influencing him. Ryouga lived without a piece of wood talking to him for most of his life. It's not exactly like he couldn't do it again. But then again, five wishes at his disposal, to use whenever he wanted, was something most people didn't come across.

If he didn't like it, he could just walk out the gate. He'd be gone as soon as he turned a corner.

"Great, meet me here after school ends. We can go together." Akane said. Ryouga smiled. Perhaps things were looking up for him.

"Sounds like a plan. See you later." He replied.

_Ah, yes,_ Ryouga thought. _My life could finally be taking a turn for the better._

It was then that the thunder rang out, the lightning streaked across the sky, and the heavens opened.

"Wait…why am I going to a strangers house in a few hours?"

_{Shut up, get under a tree and pour some hot water over yourself.}_

"AAAA! VOICE IN MY HEAD!"

_{Ugh…}_

_

* * *

_

Well, Ryouga's got a home, he's actually defeated Ranma with the help of Kodama using tactic and stategy, and...well, that's all I really covered in this chapter. So shoot me.

Sorry for the delay. Again. I've been reading The Road To Cydonia from the beginning. Gripping read. If you haven't read it already, go read it now. Yay, aliens!

Anyone up for some review replies?

**THeLordOfPages1692**: Akane and Yuka have been friends for a good long while. If somebody attacked your friend, you'd look at it in your friends sympathy. Akane is no different. What people forget about Akane is that she is a normal schoolgirl. People blow her out of proportion because she's always hitting Ranma. All of the female cast do at some point, it's just that Akane is seen more often. Akane is just loyal to her friends. She just hates Ranma because he 'tried marrying her.' And if you try saying Akane is typically looking at things the wrong way, maybe so. But, having a marriage imposed upon you is enough to make you immediatley doubt a person. Canon Ranma and Akane looked like they'd be good friends at first. Then Ranma had a bath.

The series is Uresei Yatsura. And yeah, Lum does love Ataru, but he's a loveable pervert, unlike some people in the Takahashi world.

The big battle bbetween Ranma and Ryu? Soon. And I'm not revealing anything. MUAHAHAHA!

**chm01**: The Demon God Strike and Deadly Demon God Dance will make appearances. Whether from one or the other, or both, I will not say. Yeah, the chapter was a little short, but short and sweet is better than....nothing.

**Slade2.0**: Should I even bother trying to reply to this? No. If you're going to spam the reviews, don't. Either say something about the story/chapter, ask a question, or nothing. Really.

Well, that's that. I need to try and update Saotome Siblings as well. THere are so many avaliable paths for it, but I keep focusing on R&U, or my other non-fanfic projects. It's bad, yes, as I keep you all waiting. But I do update eventually. I can only apologise.

Meh. Until next time.

Much Love, SOTG.


	14. How to leave home and never be found

"^I'm leaving.^"

"^You will do no such thing! You will stay here for your punishment, child!^"

The Amazonian village of the Joketsuzoku had seen many fights and disputes in it's many Millenia, but none were quite so serious as what was happening inside it's borders. Rumours spread like a wildfire upon parched forests and even the heaviest downpours failed to extinguish them fully.

Xian Pu looked out of the window of her great-grandmothers home, a single floor building with no distinguishing features, just made of bricks and mortar like all the buildings in the village. The view out of the window was a plain square with a large log balanced between two supports - the scene of the recent tournament Xian wasn't allowed to enter or observe, due to coming back unsuccessful.

Such was the way of the Amazons.

Xian sighed. It had been a long time since she had angered her great-grandmother like this. She knew she shouldn't have stolen the berries out of the Elders garden, but they looked so tasty, and before you know it, they're in your mouth. That was seven years ago. Xian had been punished by being dangled from her wrists for a day, with raw rope cutting into her joints.

To be fair, that was a rather minor charge. Right now, she was being charged with treason, of sorts. Hardly any amazon left the village, and those that did were usually male or exiles. No woman had willingly left the village. And for good reason.

Those who had left the village always came running back. They bought with them stories of how the males were in charge, and whilst outsider women tried to be equally as dominant, they were often pushed back down. They always came running back, desperate for the power they had over the males.

Xian Pu knew all this, and didn't care. She knew she'd have a hard time adjusting to the change in status. She knew that she'd be expected, by stereotype, to do dishes and clean floors and all sorts of things that were so...male.

Kuh Lon stood across the room from her, balanced, as always, on her gnarled walking stick. She watched her dear grand-daughter with a forlorn expression on her face. To see her own flesh and blood state so strongly that they wanted to leave the village... If it was Ra Zu, it wouldn't be a problem. After all, he was male. He was cannon fodder.

But Xian Pu was a woman. A warrior of the tribe. She couldn't leave.

"^Xian... My dear great-granddaughter... You cannot be allowed to leave the tribe.^" Kuh Lon said. Sighing, she continued. "^ It pains me to say this, Xian, but if you truly wish to leave...^"

Xian stared at her mentor, prompting the old woman to continue.

"^...then you must be exiled.^"

Xian Pu gasped. Exile? No! That's not right! There had been countless cases of villagers leaving without exile. Xian voiced this fact.

"^And what were their names, huh, Xian? Please, by all means, tell me their names.^"

"^, well, there was Af-Tu-She, Bu Ke, Shu Vel, Mu Zik-- Oh...^"

"^ And what was similar of all of them, Xian?^"

Xian Pu didn't speak. She dared not to. Because she knew that she was right in what she was about to stay, and would be accepting that she WOULD have to be exiled.

"^They... They were all Males.^" she whispered at last.

"^And so you understand. Now, do you still want to leave the tribe?^"

Xian Pu looked up, stared into her grandmothers eyes, and said words that would haunt her for the rest of her life: "^No,^" she said.

"^Well, I'm glad to hear it, Xian. I really didn't want to ha--^"

"^And yes.^"

"^Don't interrupt me, child. As I was saying, I didn't want to have to mark you wi-- What?^"

"^I said yes, as well as no, Great Grandmother,^" Xian Pu said, fire dancing in the corner of her eyes as she glared at her mentor with the emotional power of the sun. "^ I would like to do both.^"

"^But Xian, that's impossible! You can only stay or go! You must choose!^" Kuh Lon said, her old voice, withered by the years straining with the emotion and adrenalin coursing through her frame.

"^There is a way, Honoured Elder. It pains me to even think about it but... We must head south ten miles.^"

"^There is nothing south of here for another thirty miles, Xian. Nothing exce--^" Kuh Lon's eyes widened, filled with terror at the implications of what her student and heir was suggesting. "^Oh... Oh, no.^"

::::::::::::::

"You can stay in this room."

"Uhh, thank you, Kasumi-San." Ryouga said, bowing politely as he was shown what room he could stay in. A guest room, next to a washroom. Ryouga thanked the Gods for that. It'd be easy for him to nullify his paranoia that way, with hot water near him always.

_I'm going to have to explain the curse to the Tendo's. Oh, joy._

_{Hey, it'll be fine. Whenever you want to do it, tell me. I'll be able to give you the right words for the job. And that's an offer I'm more than happy to uphold. You summoned me, Ryouga, and let me see the world. It's the least I can do. I mean, Tibet, Scandinavia, Brazil, the United Kingdom and Kenya, all in one day? It's not exactly something you'll see in the window of a travel agent.}_

_Shut up, you tree. I hate my directional sense. If I could stay in one place, maybe I'd be able to appreciate it, and not just think of it as 'another place I've been by accident.' I mean, is it so much to want to be able to stay in ONE place? To be with ONE group of people? Perhaps actually make some FRIENDS? I mean, it's pretty damn hard when you can't turn a corner without jumping half a continent!_

Kodama, the tree spirit residing in the bamboo umbrella on Ryouga's pack sighed, despite not having any lungs. _{You're really stuck up on that, aren't you?}_

_Yes, dammit!!_

_{Ryouga, I will do all that I can to try and fix it as much as I can. It may be painful, and maybe even paralyzing, but if you think it'd be worth it, I can try.}_

Ryouga thought deeply for a minute, raising some mental barriers so Kodama couldn't read the thoughts. He thought about whether it'd be worth it. The family legacy had always been that the curse of direction bought them to places that they were needed. Sure, the entire clan hated the stupid thing, but they were always stronger because of it. They were either in the wrong place at the wrong time, where they learned to survive more efficiently, or they were in the right place at the right time, to help protect people from dangers that they couldn't handle alone.

On the other hand, it was through this that they often discovered or developed the family's prized fighting techniques. Ryouga was educated in the Hibiki school of adaptivity, which meant coming up with variants of attacks and defences in the middle of a battle very quickly. Ryouga was a master of the school and had developed his own techniques to go with the school. His favourite was a trump-card against any opponents who could fire Ki-blasts. To channel his Ki into his clothing, it became as solid as iron, and just as malleable. A perfect shield against standard physical attacks, and also of the energy form, as the Ki acted as a shield, deflecting anything that would normally pass through the cloth.

It was also pretty good for a party trick. Charge a bandanna and then give it to a little child to try and bend. The pictures of their faces, bemused by the strange, rock-solid cotton was ingrained into Ryouga like raising a child is natural for a mother.

Mentally sighing, Ryouga lowered his mental barriers.

_Kodama, I've had a bit of a think. I'll sleep on it. It needs some serious meditation._

_{As you wish, Ryouga. It's your life, your body. I'm just the passenger.}_

_Thank you, Kodama._

"Ryouga, are you okay?" a voice called from down the stairs. "You've been pretty quiet. Is there anything we can do for you?"

Ryouga recognised the voice as Akane. "Ah, no thank you, Akane. I'm perfectly all right. If anything, is there anything _I _can do for _you_?"

Akane's soft giggle floated up the stairs. "Ah, no, I'm quite alright, thank you, Ryouga. Dinner will be ready in about half an hour."

_{Aah, dinner. How wonderful, you get to experience something I can't. Oh, how I envy you, you big, food eating, human. You big, food eating, fighting, semi-paranoid, directionally challenged boy, you!}_ Kodama teased, his voice dripping with sarcasm and the tone of voice you'd hear from a mother teasing a child.

_Shut up, you tree._ Ryouga replied, his tone of voice dripping with near anger.

_{Ouch. Uhh, sorry. Won't do it again.}_

Raising his barriers, Ryouga had a private thought. _Stupid tree..._

_

* * *

_Notes:

Whew. Chapter 14, eh!? It's getting on a bit, I feel.

Sorry to people who want the fight between Ranma and Ryu. I still need to plan it out completely, but I'm gonna make it as epic as I can to make up for it.

Reply-to-people-who-talk-about-this-story time!

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Well, that's your decision if you hate Akane. I won't try and move you in or out of that. And whilst I am open minded about characters, I do have a few quirks with them. Ranma's ego, Ryouga's whingeing, Ukyou's clinginess (all Canon, btw, not my fic)... It niggles me. But I accept it because it makes the characters who they are. If they didn't have negative sides, they wouldn't be as loveable as they are. This is why I don't take sides in the great Anti-Akane debate that seems to spring up everywhere. I accept the character for who they are, nothing else. If here's fanon in what I write, I'd want people to notice it, so I can correct it, or write it into a situation later on. I want all my depictions to be as true as they can be - just in different circumstances.

**A Nonymous**: Really? Of course, I should have realised that. A slight overlook of mine, and I'm glad that you pointed it out to me. It's something that I will remember in future chapters and edit when I get the chance. I hope you're enjoying the story. The fact you didn't realise at first says you are, to some degree.

**Slade2.0**: What is it with all the Akane haters? SRSLY! I'm glad you're enjoying so far (I'm also glad you apologised....), but you should note that the only pairing for now is RanmaxUkyou. And I might even play with that.*COUGHYOUDIDN'TREADTHAT*

Well, people, you seem to be enjoying, if the three reviews of last chapter are anything to go by.

People, review! It motivates me, and it makes me want to write more. This is a proven fact. I know people read, and I know thay're enjoying. I know this because tells me that hits for each story are massively higher than unique visits, meaning people are reading the chapters for the first time. Right?

Well, if people like it so much that they'll read the whole thing from the start, surely theey could be kind enough to tell me what they think!?

Aargh! I'm ranting! OK, calm....

I almost forgot my typical excuse for being late with an update. Well, this time it's legit. I became a Godfather! ^_^

Well, I'm done for now. Review, read, enjoy, C&C. R&R, Whatever, stuff... I got college tomorrow and it's gonna be tiring.

Much Love, SOTG.


	15. Planning and reflections

Residents of Furinkan walked through the park, enjoying the sunny day. Men walked around in shorts and sleeveless shirts, or sometimes shirtless. Women walked around in bikini tops and not much else. The hospital had several cases of chronic nosebleeds in the morning, as many men saw female joggers running up their street, doing all that they could to escape the heat – namely running without shirts on, sports bras and gym shorts. And that's it. It didn't help some were pouring iced water over themselves, trying to reduce the temperature, even at such an early hour.

In the park, children played in their own little groups as the parents chatted amongst themselves. Couples had picnics on the grass, enjoying the sun. And people stared at the tree cut in half so cleanly it was near-impossible to work out how.

One man knew how it happened. Dressed in a black vest with a white bandanna holding his hair back, with Khaki combat pants and a utility vest over his shoulders. As he walked towards the fallen tree, he ran his finger along the bark, pulling up to reveal a splinter that he picked out. Then running his hand along the top of the stump of the tree, he pulled away to find no splinters. He could hardly even feel the texture of the tree. It was cut so cleanly it was surreal.

"Demon…"

Walking back along, he observed the trees behind. Some were missing branches, others missing whole chunks out of their sides. Walking around, the man kept an eye on the scene, until he at last stood still and gasped.

What he saw was a perfect series of cuts, all of the branch stumps, the chunks of missing tree all lined up, to reveal perfectly clean cuts.

"There must be at least two dozen…" the man whispered.

With a grim face, the man turned around and headed towards a large rock that was lying in the middle of the field. It had whole chunks missing, as if they'd been grabbed out of the very stone. Walking around the stone, he found a smiley face drawn on the other side in chalk.

"What did all this?" the man said to himself.

He knew the answer. The Demon God Strike had taken out the trees. And an unknown move had taken out the stone.

Ryu Kumon turned round and headed back to the lot he had his tent pitched at. It was time to practice more.

::::::::::::::

"Welcome to Saonji's!"

Akane walked into the booming business and sat down at the counter. Smiling, she waved at the cook behind the counter.

"Oh, Akane, hi!" Ukyou said as she swiftly finished off another meal, before throwing it across the room. "Order up!" Akane followed the Okonomiyaki and saw it caught by Ranma, who noticed Akane, smiled, and gave a two-fingered salute.

Smiling back, Akane turned and faced Ukyou, who was starting another meal for another customer. She looked up whilst her hands made the Okonomiyaki, making the dish with practiced ease. "What brings you here, Akane?" Ukyou asked innocently.

"What, can't I come and get a meal?" Akane said, smiling. "I've heard so much about this place. Everyone at school is talking about it."

"Really?" Ukyou asked, seriously. "I never knew. People like it that much?"

"Mm-hm." Akane said, nodding. "Surely you've noticed them in here."

"Oh, well, you get so many people in sometimes, you lose track." Ukyou replied with a smile.

"I'll bet." Akane laughed. "How's Ranma?"

"He's good. We've been training hard for the threat that his dad keeps talking about."

"What, this impersonator, calling himself Ranma Saotome?"

"Mm-hm." Ukyou said, sending another order over to Ranma, who caught it with a little flourish, as if it was a tricky catch. A smattering of applause ran through the restaurant. "Pfft. That wasn't hard." Ukyou said. "Oh, you haven't ordered, have you? What'll it be?"

"Oh, may I have the house special? I've heard good things about it."

Ukyou laughed and prepared the necessary ingredients. "Yeah, Ranma told me what you said. It seems they're the same guy. We're training to defeat him."

"Neat." Akane said. "Hey, what exactly is the Yama-Sen-Ken?"

Ukyou paused. She didn't want any secrets of the school escaping, as per Genma's orders. However, the Tendo School was meant to have the scroll as a gift from Genma.

_Ah, it won't hurt._

"It's to break through an opponents guard. They can't defend themselves if you rip their defence to pieces. A starting point is to shout something to startle them."

Akane twitched. This was eerily familiar.

-----------------------

"_Akane-chan!"_

"_Hai!"_

_Akane ran down the stairs of her home from her room, running into the front room where her father stood. "Are we going to do some more training today, daddy?"_

_Soun Tendo laughed. Oh, how his little Akane-chan made him laugh. "Yes, sweetheart. Go and change into your Gi, now. I'll meet you in the Dojo."_

"_Hai!"_

_As he watched his daughter run up the stairs, he sighed deeply. His youngest reminded him so deeply on his dear departed. He knew why – it was the eyes. The exact same shade of a light brown ripped his heart apart every time he looked into them. They were the reasons he fell in love with her, after all._

_His wifes eyes… They haunted his dreams. Ever since Harajuku._

_They'd been arrested the next day, charged with manslaughter._

_Shaking his head, Soun turned his attention back to the matter at hand. He walked through his house through to the dojo, where he laid his eyes upon the shrine to the departed. Bowing in respect, he did some katas to warm up whilst he waited for his daughter to get ready. Only seven and already a green belt. A truly magnificent feat that he was proud of. As her sensei, he took pride in knowing that he'd managed to get a seven year old girl up to a green belt, and as a father he was proud to have a daughter so proficient in the art._

"_Daddy!" Akane called, standing in the doorway, her pink gi and green belt creating a contrast that caught the eye. "I'm ready!"_

"_Akane-chan, warm up. Do your katas, then we can learn some new moves."_

"_Hai!"_

_Soun smiled. Ever happy to please, Akane was. Always happy to comply, even if it meant going out of her way. She often tried helping Kasumi in the kitchen, too._

Am I a bad father,_ thought Soun. The thought came from nowhere, and surprised him. _Am I a bad father for making my ten-year-old daughter do the cooking, my eight-year old for the finance and my seven-year-old learn how to fight?

_Soun shook his head and focused on his one-point, a few inches below his navel, finding comfort in its presence. He decided what to teach – Akane already knew al the basic forms and could move through them quite fluidly. _Perhaps it's time for some basic Ki-training then.

"_Akane, you can stop now. I want to teach you how to control something important to you. To me. In fact, important to every living thing on the Earth."_

_Akane looked up at him in wonder, thinking about what such a thing could be._

"_It's called Ki. It's what gives you that spark to be you. It's unique to you, and you will never run out of it. You can exhaust it, but it'll come back._

"_Ki is a force. A pure force that, with practice, we can control. Many martial artists know how to use their Ki, and there are some that do it without realising. Today I'm going to teach you a basic move to help you get the upper hand against any opponent._

"_You know your Ki-Ai. This is similar. I want you to shout for me the word 'Freeze' as loud as you can."_

_Akane nodded, filled her lungs and screamed the word. Hairs went up on Soun's neck from the extreme high pitch of the little girls' soprano voice._

"_Very good, Akane," Soun said, praising his little girl."However, if you did it like that, your opponent would laugh at you. Now, I want you to find your one-point. Do you remember where that is?"_

_Akane nodded, and closed her eyes. She then adopted a very calm state, her breathing even and deep as she focused on the point in her torso._

"_Now, I want you to do exactly the same as before, but I want you to focus on your one-point the whole time. Understand?"_

"_Hai, Daddy." Akane said, still very calm, not letting her focus waver._

"_Whenever you're ready, Akane."_

_Akane focused on her one-point more, trying to gather enough energy from it as she had been taught when keeping balance. She took some air into her lungs, and shouted "Freeze!" Suddenly, a huge pressure on her chest came out of nowhere, scaring her._

_Akane snapped her eyes open, shocked. Locking eyes to her daddy's, she saw that he was surprised as well._

_Soun had felt the strength, the emotion of that shout in his very being. It surprised him that his daughter could bring such fear into an opponent, and only on a second try. "Well, Akane-chan. That was really good. Do you want to try again?"_

_Akane smiled. "Hai!"_

_-----------------------_

Akane shuddered. That memory never came up often. Ever since she found out why her father thought it best to train her in the Art, she'd tried ignoring the lessons, appalled with him for thinking that she couldn't handle herself. After all, she was a Martial Artist.

_But who taught you?_ Came the inevitable unwanted thoughts.

_Daddy._

_And you want yourself to be appalled with him. For wanting you to be safe._

_And I was wrong._

"…Akane?"

"Oh..!" Akane said with a little jump. "Sorry, Ukyou. I was…thinking about something."

"Its fine, Sugar. We all drift away every now and then. Don't worry about it."

Akane nodded. "Thanks, Ukyou. How much?"

"No problem, Sugar. And it's on the house." Ukyou replied.

"What? No, Ukyou, I can't let you—"

"Akane, you can give me your money if you want, but I won't register it on the till. I won't spend it, I won't look at it. It'd just be pieces of metal floating around upstairs. If I say it's on the house, it's on the house. End of."

Akane sat still, wondering what to say.

"After all, what are friends for?" Ukyou said with a smile.

Akane smiled back, and giggled.

"Yo, Ranchan!" Ukyou called over the restaurant. "Order Up! Table eight!"

* * *

Notes:

A fast update for this chapter, mainly because I want reviews. I posted Chapter 14 right before a massive rush of updates and new stories, so it got lost fast.

Review reply?

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Ah, loyal reviewer. You've been with this since early chapters. And you're the only one to have reviewed Chapter 14. It's because of that rush, I'm guessing.

Ryouga and Akane? I'm not confirming, but I'm not denying either. When it comes to my pairings, I keep my cards close to my chest. And as for Xian Pu? Well, I can only say you'll have to wait....

Well, that's it.

Enjoy this chapter people. I want loadsa juicy reviews to read!

haha.

Much love, SOTG.


	16. Fires of battle

The sunset cast a beautiful pinky-grey light over the clouds, as the day drew to a close. The bell on the door rang for the final time of the day, as the last customer left Saonji's. Ukyou looked over the tables, admiring the cleanliness the diners had left behind them. She sighed. Today had been a long day.

Looking over the other end of the restaurant, she saw her dear Ranchan, mopping up a spillage of some fizzy drink that had been knocked over. The sticky floor would have gotten on her nerves, and she was glad that Ranma had taken the job already. It was one less thing to do before heading upstairs into the flat to relax.

"Ranchan," Ukyou said, gaining Ranma's attention. "What sort of practice do you think should be done today?"

Ranma leaned on the pole of the mop he was using, resting his chin on the handle. "You need to work on the subtlety more; I'm still able to sense you a little bit. You nearly have it, but a little emotion is seeping through." He smiled, reminding Ukyou why she had fallen in love with her lifelong friend. "Don't worry, though. I know you can do it."

Ukyou blushed a little at the praise. It was true; she'd always been able to pick up techniques fast. She'd been cooking Okonomiyaki at age four, and was on par with most restaurant chefs by age seven, despite being taken away with Ranma for a year. She'd used that portable griddle to massive effect, and still used it to the day. It was one of her dearest possessions. It would never leave her side.

Smiling happily, the married couple continued their chores before heading upstairs to change into casual (yet loose, for fighting purposes) clothes. After exchanging a loving look, they left together for the park, finding a secluded spot in which to train.

::::::::::::::

Ryu Kumon was worried.

There was somebody training in Anything Goes around here. No doubt training to defeat him. Perhaps he would be able to unlock the Umi-Sen-Ken from these people, surely they knew of it.

Sitting inside his tent in the park, he sat in a cross-legged position, focusing on his one-point, settling into a meditative trance, whilst keeping the metaphorical eye on his senses, so as to remain alert. He focused on his attacks, and their defences. He would rip their feeble defences apart, before delivering a rib-crushing blow to the chest, which would surely puncture a lung, or even the heart. Fight-ending injuries, without a doubt.

However, there was a feeling bugging him. It all seemed too…odd. The carnage in the park a couple of days ago had been testament enough to that, as it suggested somebody else knew the Yama-Sen-Ken – impossible, as he held the only scroll. Worried? Not at all. Suspicious? Most certainly.

Ryu didn't like it. He was hiding under a fake name. Two, even. He knew the trouble would catch up with him eventually – all those unpaid bills had to be in excess of a small fortune, but he was confident he would outrun the trouble.

And then there was the Dojo Destroying, just so he could get an honest square meal and a roof over his head. The leaders of the Dojo's would no doubt seek out the man named Ranma. He'd stop using the name, then.

However, there was still that nagging feeling that something was going to happen. His danger sense was tingling slightly, as if warning him that the shit was about to hit the fan.

Little did he know, it was more akin to a wind tunnel.

Ryu resumed his meditation. He needed to focus his Ki more. If he could paralyze an opponent with one shout, that would work ideally. He wouldn't even have to worry about exerting himself with draining techniques. A simple push of a pressure point would do the job.

Suddenly, his danger sense spiked: Some serious Ki was headed this way, and there was no explaining what it was. Was it a person leaking energy? Was it a Ki blast? Whatever it was, it was heading directly towards the tent.

Ryu snapped out of his meditative state and scrambled for the exit, making it by mere inches before his tent burst into flame.

"Wha- What the hell!?"

"Ranma Saotome?" Came a feminine voice.

"Who wants to know?" Ryu replied, his guard raised, trying to spot the opponent.

"Who I am is not important. However, my friend is looking forward to meeting you." The voice said, before soft footsteps on grass faded into silence. Ryu kept his guard raised, ready for an attack of any sort.

More footsteps this time, but they seemed heavier, louder, and slower. Soon, they stopped.

"Ranma Saotome?" came a deeper voice, clearly a man. "Ah, how I have waited for this day. I hope you're ready."

"Ready for more than what you've got, punk." Ryu replied coolly. "Bring it."

"Very well." Came the voice again. "I, Hitoshi Onodera, swear on my honour as a martial artist to defeat you for the shame you put me through. My… companion will deal with your girlfriend soon."

_Great_, thought Ryu. _I wanted Saotome to be fighting MY fights, not the other way round._

"Whatever, punk. Let's see what you've got." Ryu replied, not bothering to acknowledge the challenge.

Footsteps began circling Ryu, as the man who called himself Onodera circled him. Ryu stood still, focusing on his hearing.

"RAGE BOOMERANG!"

Suddenly, Ryu's danger sense spiked painfully, commanding his body to react. Ryu jumped up, only to have a glowing red ball of pure energy miss his toes by millimetres. Landing again, he immediately jumped again to dodge a yellow one which came from a different angle. It felt weaker, somehow.

Ryu landed again, smiling. This guy had a pretty good amount of control over his Ki. "Nice party trick. Got anything else?"

Suddenly, the man in question was in front of him. He was shorter, but his muscles were more defined, proving that size isn't everything. His black hair was cut short, allowing a full view of his face, which, if not for the pure anger etched onto it would be rather handsome.

Ryu immediately pulled his defences forward, forgetting his Ki. He blocked one blow, which surprisingly stung his forearm. However, Ryu used the block to launch his own attack.

"FEIRCE TIGER GATE OPEN BLAST!"

The pure horror on Onodera's face made Ryu smile inside. It never ended his delight to see his enemy realise what exactly they were up against.

Onodera's arms were pushed to the side, whilst Ryu's foot lashed out and caught the boy in the chest. Onodera flew backwards, landing in a roll.

The attacker smiled. "Nice. Don't expect that to happen again."

Ryu smiled as well. "Don't expect to survive next time."

Onodera's battle aura came into view, and Ryu noted it was pure red, like fire dancing around his body.

"PHOENIX BLAST!"

Suddenly, the aura DID turn into fire, and the blast that came from all around Onodera flew towards Ryu, making a shriek not unlike a bird of prey. The fire grew wings, and suddenly there really was a phoenix, and it was headed towards Ryu with its talons outstretched, ready to sear his skin with the smallest of contact.

Ryu dodged at the last moment, aiming a kick at the bird. However, in facing the bizarre flame-creature, a rage boomerang caught him in the back. Ryu grunted in pain as the blast caused thousands of tiny pinpricks of pain to erupt around the hit area. However, instead of dispersing like most Ki blasts, it rebounded towards its owner, who caught it in his hand.

Ryu landed in a roll, and as soon as he was on his feet, he decided to end it.

"DEMON GOD STRIKE!"

A blade of wind, infused with Ki sliced through the air on an unerring course for Onodera. It was a sure hit.

What Ryu didn't count on, however, was the phoenix arriving again to take the hit. The bird split in half without so much as a cry and fell to the ground, where it crumbled into ash. "May the Phoenix live long, ready to help those that call upon it." Onodera chanted, making the pile of ash burn again into nothing.

Ryu smiled. It was clearly magic, something he had only a passing interest in. However, he was tired and needed to make camp. He'd have to sleep without the benefit of a tent tonight, as it was still smouldering a few yards away, creating some ambient mood lighting for the fight in the near dark of the late summer. The light flickered over the features of Onodera's face, creating a menacing look. Ryu decided to end it for real this time.

"Nice knowing you." He said simply. "DEMON GOD MULTIPLE STRIKE!"

A dozen blades of air flew towards Onodera, who dodged as many as he could, using some rage boomerangs to disperse others. However, some inevitably made it through. After the barrage ended, Onodera bought a hand up to his cheek, and pulled away to find blood. Licking it, he said: "I'm not done yet. INFERNO!"

The battle flame around Onodera grew to a massive size, and was actually moving towards Ryu, scorching the grass black before engulfing Ryu in flame. His conditioning meant that he could handle this, and only get away with a few sore spots. However, his clothes weren't conditioned the same way, and promptly disintegrated.

Ryu looked down, then back to Onodera. He couldn't fight like this, he was…exposed. Not to say those flame attacks would seriously hurt if aimed at the right place.

It pained Ryu to say his next few words: "I yield." He said. "Lucky I'm not Saotome, eh?"

"What!?" Onodera shouted. His battle flame grew again to a considerable size, reaching out far enough to singe a few leaves on nearby trees. Noticing his near loss of control, Onodera reigned in his aura, pulling the flames with it back into his body.

Ryu smiles, and picked up his pack, which had survived the tent, albeit with a singe here and there. He walked off, whistling. Suddenly, he stopped. "I'm looking for Saotome as well. What say you we work together?"

"Not a chance." Came the feminine voice from before. "We work alone."

Ryu finally got a look at the girl who had been standing nearby the entire time. She was half Japanese, and her eyes were steel grey, revealing no emotion.

"Well, have it your way then," Ryu said. "But if Saotome is dead by the time you find him, don't come looking for me. You won't find me."

"Same for you, stranger." Said the girl. "Don't blame us for getting our revenge on Saotome and Kuonji."

Ryu nodded. He turned back around and headed on his way, heading into the copse of trees.

Suddenly, he dropped his pack and pulled out a new set of clothes before headbutting a tree. _SHE SAW ME NAKED!!!!_

The girl, Susan Brown also did similar. She turned away from her companion and blushed heavily. _No denying HE'S a man… _she thought.

::::::::::::::

At the Tendo Dojo, Akane suddenly got very angry. _Perverts… Nearby._ She thought.

* * *

Notes:

Aah, I'm on a roll. It's amazing how having exams at college can spur you on to write a bit. Stress-buster? You bet. Listening to classic tunes whilst writing also helps.

I got some review replies!

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Aww, I'm touched. Really. I'm glad you think so, and I think that there could really be some more serious RanxUkyou writing out there. I'm only doing this because I wondered what'd happen if Ranma was already married, long before Jusenkyou. Ukyou was the only option really, without creating a new character, which would have been exhausting.

Well, I hope you keep enjoying this.

**DrunkenGrognard**: I'm glad you find it interesting. I hope you enjoy this and future updates!

**Slade2.0**: Glad you're enjoying!

**James Birdsong**: Did well? Doing well, I think you mean. Still going strong! So many plot ideas!

Well, thank you all for reading this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it. And before anyone asks, I'm building up to EPIC STUFF.

Much Love, SOTG.


	17. Challenges of every kind

--Directly after the fight of the last chapter--

"Ranchan, over here!"

Ranma looked over to where his wife, battle spatula on her back was and smiled. A good place to practice their moves was apparent – a rocky outcrop with many trees nearby. "Nice work, honey!" he called back as he walked over to Ukyou.

"Shall we?" Ukyou said, not really asking. She knew what the answer would be.

Ranma grinned a cocky grin. Putting his own battle spork on the ground, he turned to face the trees and selected one with branches curling in towards each other, much like a man holding his arms raised in front of him would. "FIERCE TIGER GATE OPEN BLAST!"

The thick branches snapped easily and the trunk of the tree was ripped apart, the stump left behind barely higher than Ranma's knee. Ranma immediately followed up with his own attack straight after. "WINGED PAIN!"

Immediately, several dozen table knives flew from his hands, similar to his wife's spatula shurikens. The knives embedded themselves in the still-moving tree. It was no mean feat to get them out again – for a normal man. Ranma simply walked up to the now fallen tree and with only a little tug, pulled them free. "Whew," he said, wiping the sweat off his brow. "That combo takes a fair amount out of me."

"And so it should, sugar." Ukyou replied. "It's no mean feat pulling things out of your sleeves as fast as that. I've cut myself several times pulling my spatulas out that way."

"Oh? Well perhaps you ought to be more careful…!" Ranma replied cockily. Ukyou laughed with him before taking a stance. The temperature dropped a notch.

"Perhaps you ought to watch your back." She replied in a dead neutral voice, seemingly from all around. Suddenly, she phased out of view and struck Ranma's back several times before Ranma did a backwards leg sweep. Ukyou's invisible form jumped over Ranma's leg and then dived underneath him. "Foundation Sweep." She said in that dull, monotone voice.

Ranma felt his wife's hands grab his ankles and suddenly found himself landing on the small of his back painfully. Wincing, he stood up. "Nice one, Ucchan. Now try again."

Ukyou obliged, invisibly attacking behind him the same as before, but instead of then going for the legs, she stuck the back of Ranma's knees, causing his legs to buckle, before then going in for the Foundation Sweep.

Ranma, however, was prepared, and shouted: "FREEZE!" Ukyou's sudden lapse in concentration due to the fear that the shout caused in her very being made her slip out of the Umi-Sen-Ken, allowing Ranma to jump up and backwards, landing behind his wife and locking her arms into place behind her.

Ukyou started, and then slumped. Looking over her shoulder, she grinned. "We are so trying this in the bedroom." She said seductively. Ranma blushed as deep as his shirt. Ukyou then freed herself and leg-swept Ranma, knocking him onto his front.

"What the hell kinda move was that!?" Ranma shouted.

"Anything Goes, sugar," Ukyou replied with a grin and a giggle. "I thought you knew that."

"Stupid violent wife using attacks on the spot like that why I oughtta.." Ranma mumbled.

"What!?" Ukyou screamed. "I'll teach you!" Lunging for her husband, Ukyou pulled her battle spatula from her back. Suddenly, her giant utensil was parried with Ranma's own, which he had grabbed from the ground in the blink of an eye. "Now try using the Umi-Sen-Ken." He said seriously.

Ukyou frowned. Trying to slip into the frame of mind, she found it suddenly a lot harder. "H-How did you do that!?" she cried, aghast that her new technique had been defeated without her even realising.

Ranma grinned. "Simple. You need to feel no emotion in using 1000 Seas. If your – our – opponent got you angry enough, all your training would be useless."

Ukyou's eyes widened with realisation. "Of course…"

"Shall we call it a day?" Ranma said.

Ukyou looked at her husband, who was sweating heavily. "Yeah, I think you need a bath. And so do I." she said with a wink.

Ranma grinned again "Great, lets g—"

"Not so fast."

Ranma and Ukyou turned around. "Who're you?" Ranma said, his voice losing all traces of humour."

The newcomer was hidden in the shadows, out of the moonlight. They saw his face smile a humourless smile. "My name is not important. However, yours is. Your name?"

"Saotome."

The newcomer grinned again, showing off his teeth as well this time. "Finally. Saotome, are you ready to be defeated?"

::::::::::::::

"Japan…"

A young Chinese man with black hair tied into a loose ponytail walked off the boat that had just docked, and headed for the exit of the docks.

_Back again, huh? Who would have thought that I would be here again in such a short amount of time…_

"Anything to declare?" said the port official.

"More than you can possibly understand." The Chinese person said, walking past.

"Hey, you! What do you mean by that!?" the official called after him. "Do you have anything from abroad that you need to declare, yes or no."

"No," the man said simply. "Nothing like that."

The official looked the man up and down, studying his body language. He seemed tense, but he didn't seem to be hiding anything. "Fine, you can go. Enjoy your time in Japan."

"Thank you." The man said, before walking towards the dock exits again.

The man headed towards Nerima, where he heard there was a room available for rent. The wad of Yen in his pocket made it possible to at least stay somewhere a couple of nights before being able to find a job. It was time to cast away tradition. It was time to cast away being able to live off others work.

At least he'd be able to stay in the dominant role. There was always that.

Xian Pu was now a man. And Xian Pu would at least be able to stay in relative charge. _Shame about the body, though._

Ah well, what're the chances of being hit by hot water?

"Aaah!" Xian turned round to see what happened, as was human instinct, and received a face full of machine coffee. "Aiya… What are odds?"

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Miss. Please, my apologies." The man who had tripped and let loose flying caffeine bowed deeply, before offering to pay for dry-cleaning. Xian kindly denied. What difference would it make? She'd buy more clothes for both forms when she got the money. _Ah, yes. Money. Need to live somewhere first; to Nerima._

::::::::::::::

"Ryouga-san?"

"Yes, Kasumi?" Ryouga called back down the stairs.

"The bath's free, if you would like to use it." Kasumi's voice floated back up the stairs.

"Thank you, Kasumi. I'll use it right away!" Ryouga hurried back to his room to get his bathroom supplies before heading back downstairs to use the bath. After being guided around enough, Ryouga could find his way around the house easily. It was when he stepped outside that things went awry.

However, he still got lost easily, and ended up walking into the Dojo changing room, catching an eyeful of a semi-changed Akane. "Ack! Akane-san, my apologies! I got lost, and—"

"PERVERT!"

Ryouga flew through the ceiling and landed outside the house in the Koi pond. "Aaah, I'm paranoid! I'm gonna start worrying over everything! I'm gonna start thinking that rock's planning to kill me! I need to find the bath, quick! I need my sanity back!" Running through the open doorway to the house, he found the bathroom and dived straight for the bath, only to find it had been drained, waiting to be filled again. "Stupid rock! You did this, I know it!"

Grabbing a small bucket, he kneeled down to fill it with hot water and dumped it over his head. "Aaah, that's better."

Suddenly, the shower head exploded and doused the room and it's contents in cold water.

Ryouga stayed kneeled exactly where he was, looking at the shower head with with fear and amazement in his eyes. _What are the odds…? What are the __**fucking**__ o_dds!?

* * *

Notes:

Yaaay! Seventeenth chapter! --pulls party-poppers--

Nothing really to celebrate, but can anyone guess who the mystery guest is?

Whilst you mull on that, I'll answer some reviews.

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Always first to review, aren't you? Haha.

In answer to your two questions, the new characters are OC's. Hitoshi Onodera has no family. He has no history. He oficcially doesn't exist. All he knows is Martial Arts. Susan Brown is half American, half Japanese and is all anti-fighting, except in the name of honour and revenge. She's against fighting because she lost her older brother to friendly fire in the Vietnam War. Full information is in a previous chapter. Can't remember off the top of my head which, but they'll play a vital role in all this.

In answer to your second question, Ryu does NOT have a girlfriend. Remember, Hitoshi and Susan thought he was Ranma, and (if you read the intro and second appearance of them), you'll know that they lost to a boy and a girl respectively. Go work it out, not that hard. And Susan Brown would be a familiar name in termes of Harry Potter - you're thinking of Susan _Bones_.

**King Loki**: Why, thank you very much. Feel free to ask any questions, I'll be happy to answer them. Within reason, of course.

**James Birdsong**: Maybe amazing? I must try harder. And I'm happy you enjoy reading my work. It's a good feeling on both ends.

That's all folks! I gotta sleep tonight because I got's a gig to perform tomorrow. Fun-fun!

Now to watch some Uresei Yatsura.

Much Love, SOTG.


	18. Hitoshi Vs Ranma

The dark of the park was illuminated by the glow of the moon, casting an eerie feel to all that moved. Those sensitive to the atmosphere would have run a mile from the tension in the air, as two fighters with large weapons held forward faced another figure, cloaked in darkness, hiding from the moonlight under a tree.

"Who are you?" Ranma asked. His danger sense was tingling, aching in pain from the powerful aura the stranger emitted.

"Saotome, Saotome, Saotome..." the stranger said. "What makes you think you have the right to know who I am?"

"You're challenging me, are you not?" Ranma replied coolly. "Surely a challenger states who they are before fighting. To not would be dishonourable."

"Don't talk to me about honour, you peice of shit!" the stranger shouted, clearly angry. "You and your shithead father have no right to talk about honour. I've been trailing you for years, and I've heard stories of the father and son team who freeloaded and ran riot after being found out. Hell, the only honourable person in your company would be that sweetheart next to you, despite the fact her honour must be tainted from merely knowing you, you worthless pile of crap!" The stranger growled, spitting the last word out. "You wouldn't know honour if it slapped you in the face."

Ranma bristled. Nobody, NOBODY insulted Ranma Saotome and got away with it. And the move towards Ukyou was unacceptable. This man would die, or at least be hospitalised for a few months. "Fighting words, but I have a feeling you're all bark and no bite." Ranma grinned cockily, raising his battle spork, ready to fight. "Fancy trying to prove me wrong?"

The man in the shadows smiled, sensing the prey was ready to be captured. "Saotome Ranma, are you ready?"

"More than ready for you." Ranma replied, grinning like a cheshire cat.

"Good. My...companion will be here shortly to deal with your friend."

"If they hurry, you could try and double team me. Hey, who knows, perhaps I'll actually have to try then."

The stranger stepped forward, into the moonlight. He was short, with defined muscles. His short black hair revealed a face that was contorted with anger. "I, Hitoshi Onodera, swear on my honour as a martial artist to defeat you for the shame you put me through. Prepare yourself!"

The two fighters jumped, and collided in midair, and fought.

::::::::::::::

Ryu sat up from his position on the ground, looking up at the stars. He could sense a large presence of raw energy nearby. _Hm, better check it out. Could be interesting._ He thought.

Gathering his things and putting them under a bush nearby, he leaped into a tree and hopped along the branches of the copse until he was near the source of all the energy. For some reason, it was also much hotter here than back where he left his things.

"Rage Boomerang!"

_Him? What's he doing?_

Creeping a bit further forward so he could see the man who fought him, he saw another fight going much the same way his had. The unknown fighter was jumping, holding his weapon ready to deflect any other Ki blasts that might head his way. Landing, the fighter immediately rolled to the side to avoid the ball of Ki as it swept back round in an arc. The fighter, Onodera, caught it in his hand, absorbing the energy back in.

"Pretty nice move, there dude." the weapon-user said. "Now try mine! Moko Takabisha!"

Holding his weapon diagonally across his body, he channeled his Ki through the staff of the weapon into the bowl at the top, which was spiked like a...

"A spork?" Ryu muttered, surprised. "Interesting..."

Watching the fight again, Ryu saw the ball of energy form in the bowl of the spork, before the owner of the giant utensil swung the entire weapon around his body like a Bo-staff, throwing the ball of energy at Onodera. Onodera, slightly surprised by the revelation that his opponent was fighting with cutlery, jumped a little too late, the ball of pure blue-gold ki clipping his foot, throwing him round in the air.

"An opening!" shouted the other fighter, who rushed forward and struck Onodera several times with the bowl and handle of the weapon as well as several kicks and punches. Onodera flew back after receiving several blows, his clothes ripped as he stood up shakily. "Hm. Not bad, Saotome. But I thought you could go better."

_Saotome?_ Ryu thought. _That's Saotome? Ranma Saotome? Excellent! Now I can gain the Umi-Sen-Ken!"_

Ranma smiled cockily. "You haven't seen anything yet."

"As have you." Onodera replied, holding his arms out, his aura coming into life, flickering red along his form. Ryu smiled. Saotome won't expect this.

"Phoenix Blast!" Onodera shouted, his aura turning to flame as the bird of prey flew forth, it's wings aflame.

Saotome jumped back in part shock, part self-defence. He eyed the bird carefully as it flew around it's summoner. "So, you want to bring magic into this, eh?" he smiled. "Well, I'll use forbidden techniques! Air-Knife!"

::::::::::::::

Ukyou looked at the fight in wonder, absorbing the fight as she saw Ranma use his spork to great effect in producing a ki-blast. Something she'd have to try and simulate herself. The phoenix that arrived was interesting, but what was more interesting was Ranma's method of destroying it.

"AIR-KNIFE!"

Ranma clapped his hands together, then pulling them away fast enough to leave behind a vacuum, which, with a push of Ki was sent hurtling towards the flame-bird. However, what nobody expected (except Onodera) was for the bird to fly directly towards the blade of air, meeting it head on. Suddenly, the bird became a fireball, causing everyone to shield their eyes.

When the flames died down, Ranma looked up, expecting the fireball to be the bird destroyed. Instead, he saw the bird stronger than before. "Wh..What!?"

"You weren't expecting that, were you, Saotome!?" Onodera shouted, cackling. I've faced an attack just like that not too long ago, and my hpoenix was destroyed by it. However, the Phoenix always is reborn stronger than before!"

"Let me guess," Ranma interrupted. "Your bird absorbed the attack, becoming stronger than before."

"Correct. However, something is different Phoenix usually looks the same after absorbing an attack." Onodera held out his hand, engulfing it in flame, calling the bird to him. The Phoenix perched on his hand and looked at it's master, Onodera's face concentrating.

"What the heck is he doin'..." Ranma muttered to himself.

Suddenly, Onodera laughed. "Is that so?"

The Phoenix nodded.

"Well then, Saotome!" My Phoenix is stronger than ever!!"

"Just shut up." Ranma said, channeling another ball of Ki up into the ball of his spork. Throwing it at the bird, he watched the bird float there.

And not move. _Uh-oh,_ thought Ranma. _This could be bad._

The ball of Ki hit the bird, engulfing it in an unnatural glow, before the bird flew forward, wings trailing fire and Ki. Ranma moved to knock the bird aside with his spork, before realising that his opponent was fire and his weapon was metal.

"Oh shit."

The rounded bowl of the spork impacted with the bird, knocking it aside, but not before it's intense heat was conducted down the weapon and into Ranma's hand.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAA HOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOT!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Ranma!" Ukyou shouted, throwing a bottle of water. "Calm the burn!"

Ranma caught the water and poured it liberally over his hands, not caring about activating the Jusenkyo curse. However, the Phoenix did care.

It glided over to Ranma-chan, before gently settling on the ground in front of her.

_--You are now a woman. Why is this?--_

"Uh!?" Ranma-chan replied dumbly. "You can talk to me?"

_--Yes. It takes some getting used to, having a Phoenix talk to you inside your head. However, my question still stands.--_

Ranma-chan kept looking at the bird dumbly.

_--Oh, forget it. I'll look myself.--_

Suddenly, Ranma's mind started acting of it's own accord. Memories long forgotten flashed past, including one of a kindly looking woman, one of Ukyou's father last time they had met and one of the Neko-Ken training. Ranma-chan shivered at the memory. It had traumatised her beyond belief what had happened... Nobody should be put through that.

The flame-bird kept looking, until it found the memory it wanted.

_--You two are married and each cursed to change into the opposite sex?--_

Ranma-chan nodded.

_--Do you realise how bizarre that sounds? Let alone have the memory here.--_

"You call Jusenkyo bizarre when you're a Phoenix talking to me in my mind!?"

_--Point taken--_

"Hey! Saotome?" Ranma-chan looked up. Onodera was looking at her with a mixture of fear and curiosity. "You... You're a girl?"

Ranma-chan nodded. "Only in body, and only when hit with cold wa--"

"You're a GIRL!?"

"Only when splashed with c--"

"I can't fight a girl! It's dishonourable! I've been fighting a girl the whole time!?"

"No, idiot! I'm a guy!"

"But you're a girl!"

"I'm cursed!"

"Bullshit."

"You have a phoenix!!"

"I studied under a Mage for a while."

"I'm CURSED! THAT'S MAGIC!"

"Yeah, but, you're a girl. I can't fight a girl."

Ranma turned to the phoenix. "Can you explain to him what happened to me at Jusenkyo?"

_--Of course.--_

"Cheers. So you don't fight girls?"

"It's immoral!"

"You're scared."

"Scared!?" Onodera shouted. "Scared of what!?"

"That you'll get beaten up by a girl, I'd say." Ranma-chan grinned, crossing her arms across her chest.

"Can't nobody defeat me!" Onodera said back, pointing at himself with a thumb. "I'm the best!"

"Care to prove?"

"Why you--"

_"Stop."_

Everyone turned to look at the Phoenix. _"There will be no more fighting tonight. Onodera, I have much to explain to you. Saotome, you need to recover and change back to your true form. You, Kumon, in the trees. You need to stop spying!"_

*WHUMP*

Ryu sat up after falling out of the tree he was perched in. "How did you know I was there?"

_"I know a lot of things. Now, begone. All of us must head our separate ways. There is much to do, much to learn, much to discuss and much to sleep on."_

"Yes, Phoenix." Onodera said. He streched his arm out and allowed the phoenix to perch on his limb before walking away.

"I too must rest." Ryu said. _So, he's cursed, eh? That could prove useful._

Ranma-chan looked towards her wife: "Guess we'd better get home as well, eh Ucchan?"

Ukyou frowned. "Damn right we're going home, Ranchan. Those are some serious burns on your hands."

Ranma-chan laughed. "OK, let's go."

Ukyou smiled, taking her husbands feminine arm and linking it through her own arm.

However, Ranma was thinking hard. _He can control fire, summon Phoenixes and is stupidly arrogant. I'll show him...._

_

* * *

_

Notes:

I'm still alive, don't worry. Easter holidays, been partying. Gotta live, you know!

Sorry for being so late on this update. I forget that I'm writing this sometimes. ^_~

Reviews?

**chm01**: Filler? No, this is a serious plot-arc. There's more to come. And yeah, the curses make you a water magnet exactly when you least expect it, or tempt fate.

**TheLordOfPages1692:** Lavender Brown? This is the Ranma section, not Harry Po-- Oh, yes. Susan Brown. Sorry. Memory lapse much? And for your information, Hitoshi and Susan were defeated _at the same time._ Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think Ranma can be in two places at once, and he hasn't got a sister in this fic. So, that must mean... it was Ukyou!

And so you should be impressed. It's not easy, you know, coming up with all of this. Also, Ryouga's just funny when paranoid. It's so fun to write. I'm actually considering making a sidestory-oneshot, all about Ryouga. And Ukyou's a saucy minx, eh? Oh, behave...

Well, that's that until next time.

Much love, SOTG.

._.


	19. Amazonian diplomacy and some matchsticks

"I would like job please."

The manager of the restaurant looked at the Chinese man with a look of interest and wariness. The Chinese man's arms toned with muscle and the man could barely get a word of Japanese out without missing a word out – clearly new in Japan.

Of course, the manager wanted extra help in the kitchens and at the tables – he wouldn't have put up a notice asking for help otherwise – but he wasn't expecting what looked like China's runner-up lightweight in weight-lifting to ask for the vacancy. Not to mention he seemed to be looking at the skyscrapers of Central Tokyo in the distance with what seemed to be wonder. _He must have come from rural China, I suppose._ The manager thought. _Well, I came from the country. Life was hard at first. And to be from another country as well. Poor guy._

"Sir, you're welcome to the job. I can tell you need to get a foothold here in Japan rather soon or you'll fall through." In traditional western style, he stood up and offered his hand. "Congratulations on your new job, Mr. Pu."

The Chinese man's face lit up. "I have job?" The manager nodded with a smile. "Aiya! Thank you!" The foreigner grasped the managers hand and pumped it fully.

"You're completely welcome, Xian. You start in two days. See you then."

"Hai, sempai!" Xian Pu replied, using the respectful term. "Day after tomorrow, I be there!" Xian-kun ran out of the office in elation, glad that he's managed to gain the job. Running to his single-bedroom flat, Xian-kun smiled. _Perhaps it'll be easier this time after all._

Ukyou-kun smiled to himself. A new member of staff would help business boom.

::::::::::::::

"^Mu Tze!^"

The male Amazon turned round to face the elder balanced precariously on a pole. Unfortunately, Mu Tze didn't have his glasses on at the time, so he turned a bit further than he had to, to look at a bonsai tree. "^An elf?^"

"^This way, you fool!^" Elder Kuh Lon said, whacking the boy on his head with her staff. "^And put your glasses on!^"

Mu turned to face the correct direction now, placing his coke-bottom glasses on his nose. "^What is it, Elder?^"

"^I wish for you to go to Japan and follow Xian Pu. As the strongest male in the village, you're the most likely to survive her if you were to be found in the wrong circumstances. And knowing you, that's all the more likely to happen.^" Mu bristled. "^I'd send a woman after her, but we're preparing our defences. The whispers on the wind say that the Musk are building their armies, for what, we don't know. But we're taking precautions.^"

_Musk? Armies?_ Mu thought. _Take this chance, Mu, if you stayed, you'd be the first line of defence if anything DID happen. Given the choice between a battering from Xian and a Musk army, I'd take Xian any day._

"^Oh, and before you get any ideas, if the Musk DO attack, you are to bring Xian back immediately, as you will both be defending the village. You'll be part of the first lines of defence, yourself.^"

_Damn._ "^Yes, Elder; is there anything else?^"

"^Yes, stop calling that bonsai tree Elder!"

"^Yes, Elder,^" Mu said, his head bowed. "^When do you want me to leave?^"

"Immediately." Kuh Lon replied in Japanese. "Now. Pack your things and go. Now! WHY ARE YOU STILL STANDING THERE!? MOVE!"

Mu Tze scampered away, terrified, before packing his things and leaving. It wouldn't take long to get to Japan. Finding Xian, though? That'd be awkward. Well, the sooner he left, the more chance he'd have of getting there.

::::::::::::::

The Tendo Dojo was quiet, the birds singing in the morning sunshine as Japan prepared to wake up for the day. Unfortunately, that silence was broken by the extremely loud scream of "PERVERT!" before a bandanna-clad boy in yellow flew through the roof, landing in the pond. "AAAAH! I COULDA BROKEN MY NECK DOING THAT!" The boy shouted. "Don't you realise that the amount of deaths from falling has risen sharply within the last three years!? People are getting more accident prone!"

A bluish-black haired teenage girl stood on the porch, hastily pulling down a shirt before shouting back. "And where did you hear that? Cite your sources!"

"Uhh… Akane, I--"

"Ryouga-kun, don't say such things when you don't even know if they're true or not. I know it's only your curse, but still…" Akane sighed, her hair still wet and dripping onto the shirt. "Look, I know it's hard, Ryo-kun, but you've got to try and reign yourself in. I'm sorry for punching you through the roof. But why did you walk in on me in the bath?"

"Well, there was no sign on the door, so I thought—"

"You thought wrong."

"But the sign—"

"Screw the sign, you ought to knock first."

"But—"

"Give up, Ryo-chan." Came the voice of Nabiki. "When Akane's mind is set, there's not much that will change it. However, a sisterly influence won't cost you…"

"Nabiki? Really? Thanks!" Ryouga replied, a bit of happiness seeping through the constant paranoia. "I really appre—"

"As I was saying before you interrupted, it won't cost you… that much."

Ryouga slumped. He should have known this would happen. He already had to pay a little rent, food tax, bath tax, drink tax… He'd lost count. Hell, he'd already been charged for breakfast. _But, I suppose __¥300 isn't THAT bad…_

­"Fine, I give in. I'll pay you later. ¥­200

"¥500."

"300."

"425."

"350?"

"375." Nabiki said, sensing a deal.

"Fine… Can I get some hot water. I'm getting scared that Nabiki will charge me for being in the pond now." Ryouga said with a sigh of acceptance.

"Actually…" Nabiki started, pulling out a notebook and pencil, writing some figures.

"LALALA NOT LISTENING!!!" Ryouga shouted as he ran towards the kitchen. Of course, he ended up in Soun's bedroom.

Later on, finally gaining some hot water, Ryouga set up a couple of practice dummies, and braided each one with a pigtail which ran down the back, ending between where the shoulder blades would be. He then stood back and focused. A dark green aura flickered into life around him, giving him the power he wanted.

Ryouga had taken a leaf out of Ranma's book and found that emotions supercharged his Ki in such a way that he was able to manipulate the Ki into what he wanted. The first thing he'd developed was a projectile attack like Ranma's. The tactic that his companion in his umbrella, which was lying not far away, had given him the idea of using his bandanna's as a smokescreen whilst he fired his main attacks. If he was able to do all of it from afar, he'd be able to wind his opponent before following up with toe-to-toe fighting. He planned to use it on Ranma first.

The aura grew darker, turning from a dark green to nearly black, tinted green and occasionally a streak of red, orange and yellow flew across. The aura focused down Ryouga's arms, eventually taking on a demonic glow around his hands, and taking on a more physical form between his palms. Ryouga looked up and selected his first target. Ryouga pulled his palms back, shaping the mass of black and green Ki into a ball.

"SHISHI HOKODAN!"

The name meant Lion Roar Shot, and was fuelled from depression. The curse helped the attack, and Ryouga had found that the attack was much stronger when paranoid. He wouldn't resort to it if helped, but it was nice to have it to fall back on. Perhaps falling in the Pian Zhi Kuangchuan was a blessing and a curse.

The training dummies were fascinated by this. Unfortunately, their fascination was short-lived.

Ryouga winced as the ball of pure depression and hatred obliterated the practice dummy, blowing it into matchwood and splinters. The ball continued going until it hit the perimeter wall, denting it.

_Well, fuck._ Ryouga thought. _Nabiki's gonna charge big-time for that._

_

* * *

_

Notes:

Aah, the weathers been beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. Been walking around in a shirt - and it's still April! Wooh! So what do I do? I sit at my computer and write fanfiction. I think I need to sort my priorities out.

On the flip side, I finally learnt how to play Wonderwall by Oasis on guitar properly today. Gonna be fun in the summer. ^^

Right! Reviews!

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Hitoshi ticks you off? Hm. I think he's a bit like Ranma, myself. Still, vengeance can drive a man to do crazy things...

**chm01**: Well, that's what Ranma does. The ingenuity of him never ceases to amaze me. A little infobite - see if you can work it out: Hitoshi Onodera's element is Fire and his animal is the bird. What's Ranma?

**James Birdsong**: Wow, really? I really don't think it's THAT good!

**Misao2008**: You posted five independent reviews for the story, all at different parts. Whilst I'm not complaining - it's bolstered my review counter and made me capable of gloating when I got an email alert on my phone ("Naa naa, I got email and you don't cuz no-one loves you!" "Shut up, Nico.") - I find it a bit cluttery when I look at the reviews page to reply to all of them. Meh.

Also, thank you for pointing out a few errors on my part at various points in the story. I'll have to find the original copies and re-upload them before you'll see any changes there. All thanks will be to you at the bottom of each chapter. Gimmie a week, I'll need to do a mass search to find them...

Mousse is back! You'll be seeing more of him in the future. Yes, he'll get beaten up a lot, but I hope for him to have a vital role in this story. =) And you shoudn't have stayed up to read the story. You need you's beauty sleep, girl!

New series? From Takahashi? Yes, I know! I'm eagerly looking forward to it. First day it's out, I'll be down my Manga shop. AND I URGE EVERYONE READING THIS TO DO THE SAME! I mean, you're reading Fanfiction of one of the best Manga's ever - fact. You all know how popular Inuyasha is - just think what the new series will be like! More information is at .

Well, that's me done. Now for a cigarette.

Oh! Before I go, I'd just like to tell everyone that it's Misao2008 that found out the name of the Spring Of Drowned Paranoid-man - Pian Zhi Kuangchuan. Kudo's to her. Also, check out her writing, it's really good!

Also, I have a poll on my profile on whether I ought to have review replies like this. It clutters up the bottom, and I think this is the longest so far. So your choices are YES! Keep them! and No! I'd rather have an email. Or something along those lines. Meh.

I'm done. Ugh tired.

Much Love, SOTG.


	20. Unwanted attention

_Two weeks later_

"Order up! Table twelve!"

The hustle and bustle of Saonji's restaurant at lunchtime was a scene of organised chaos. The hubbub of conversation, occasionally injected with a roar of laughter and another order being delivered. The three workers of the restaurant worked hard to keep on top of the orders, all three pulling out all the stops. Ranma-chan was around the tables, gathering orders and the occasional feel from the more confident males of the custom, and placing food on the tables and pain to the bodies of the diners. Ukyou-kun was making her specialised dish at alarming speeds, which would cause most professional chefs to consider retiring, and a male Xian went around collecting plates and glasses to place in one of two industrial-speed dishwashers. All in all, a normal day at the restaurant.

Ukyou looked towards her new employee, noting how his speed and agility between the tables made sure that there was always a ready table for any new customers. She had found out about Xian's true gender after a mishap involving the dishwasher being opened early, spraying Xian with hot water. Ukyou had immediately taken the Chinese girl into the store room.

"You didn't tell us?" Ukyou asked, confused.

"Xian Pu not tell Ukyou or Ranma she sex-changing freak?" Xian had replied in her disjointed Japanese. "Xian Pu wonder why!"

Ukyou had then gotten a glass of cold water from the nearby sink and dumped it over her own head. "Sugar, we have more in common than we realised." Ukyou-kun responded. "I wouldn't throw someone like me out to the streets."

Xian had cried into Ukyou-kun's shoulder for twenty minutes or so, before looking up and smiling with red puffy eyes. "Xian Pu glad there someone like Xian Pu." She had said, happily.

Back in the present, Ukyou smiled at Xian-kun. _Sugar, we have got to sort you out some language lessons._ She thought.

The bell rang, signalling someone had arrived in the restaurant. "Akane, hi!" Ukyou said, seeing the blue-haired girl. Following was a familiar face that was glancing around everywhere, trying to spot anything dangerous.

"Hey, Ukyou." Akane replied. "Sorry to be so crude, but have you got any hot water?" She indicated a nervous-looking Ryouga, who was still glancing around.

"Ah, yeah, no problem." Ukyou said, drawing some hot water from the tap and passing it to Ryouga in a cup. Ryouga took it gratefully and poured it over himself.

"Aah, that's better." Ryouga said, stretching. He glanced towards Ranma-chan and frowned. "Is that wise?"

Ukyou and Akane looked towards the redheaded girl and had mixed reactions. Ukyou just wondered what Ryouga meant, whereas Akane got angry at the aquatransexual for flaunting his curse. Ryouga noticed this, and whispered something in her ear. Akane calmed down.

Ukyou looked towards Ranma-chan and tried to work out what Ryouga meant, before realising that his husband/wife was being felt up a fair bit by the guys. Whilst the men got what they deserved, Ukyou still felt quite angry that they'd do that. He'd had it before himself, but it still made him angry.

Sighing, he turned back towards his friends. There wasn't really anything he could do – change Ranma back into a guy? Sure, scare some of the newer customers away, why not? He just hoped Ranma could deal with it.

"So, what'll it be?" Ukyou asked, flipping a pair of spatulas in each hand. "C'mon, you guys didn't just come in for a cup of water now, did you? Is there anything I can get you?"

Ryouga smiled. Sure, Kasumi was a good cook, but it was nice to get a piece of grilled food every now and then.

Placing their orders, Akane and Ryouga sat down at the counter, as Ukyou-kun whipped up the meals. Casual conversation followed, and the three friends discussed new Anime's and Mangas, school and fighting techniques. As the meal was served, Ukyou-kun sparked a conversation on something he had noticed.

"So, what's the deal with you two, eh?" he asked casually. "You're staying at Akane's, aren't you, Ryouga?"

"Uhh…" Ryouga mumbled. "Yeah, I am. I'm grateful for a roof over my head and a friend to talk to." Turning to Akane, Ryouga continued. "Akane, I can't thank you enough. I owe you so much in return, you name it and it's done."

Akane blushed. "Aww, thanks Ryouga. I'm glad to be your friend too." She glanced at the currently-female Ranma. "Unlike some perverts…"

Ukyou-kun smiled at all except the last comment, at which he frowned. These two were _made_ for each other! They looked cute together, and clearly got on well. _Time for some Kuonji-school matchmaking-fu,_ she thought.

Pouring some more batter on the grill, he started making an extra-large serving of Okonomiyaki, dividing it in half with a line of sauce and filling the two halves with the previous orders' toppings on each side. Subtly, he also added a heart to the design, not obvious, but it was there if you looked at the dish a little more closely than normal. It was similar to the love notes Ukyou wrote Ranma on Okonomiyaki before they had gotten married.

Serving it up, Ukyou-kun refused their tender, insisting it was on the house. As Akane and Ryouga ate their combined meals, Ukyou couldn't help but smile – Both were tracing the shape of the heart when they picked at the toppings of their halves.

The Saonji Heart Meal had struck again.

::::::::::::::

Ryu Kumon walked down the local road towards the shop, preparing to buy his supplies for the week. He had taken to living in Nerima, so he could focus on Saotome more, but all that had happened was him seeing what appeared to be his twin sister working in a local restaurant, waiting tables. However, Ryu had also noted that, out of working times, this redheaded girl wasn't far from Saotome himself.

The bare scraps of a plan formed in Ryu's mind, as he started plotting on a way to bring Saotome to him.

_Little girl,_ Ryu thought. _You have no idea what a large part of my plan you will be a part of._

Sneering, Ryu walked into the shop, laughing darkly under his breath, another step closer to securing the Umi-Sen-Ken.

::::::::::::::

Mu Tze walked off the boat, setting foot into Tokyo Bay. His fluent Japanese allowed him to bypass customs with ease, thankful that he had lined his robes with a near-undetectable material that hid the mass amount of weaponry hidden up his sleeves from metal detectors.

The blind fighter headed towards Nerima, which was where Xian was last known to have been. Hopefully, she found somewhere to stay, and was safe.

Because if she wasn't, they'd have to answer to Mu Tze.

Heading towards a cash machine at the side of the street, Mu Tze pulled out a card that was one of several that the Joketsuzoku had, which were given to tribesfolk who left the village on missions and would need funds to aid them. All led to a shared account, but each card was traceable, and the village elders only needed to use one of two telephones in the village to contact the bank and get a statement detailing where each card was. It was a system that had worked ever since the tribe had gotten the cards, as the money was actually from the villages priceless heirlooms, and even though bailiffs would have a hard time getting their money if they wanted it, the Elders didn't want to risk the funds being drained.

Collecting enough money to travel to Nerima and book a room at a hotel, Mu Tze started his search for Xian.

Four hours later, he had gotten nowhere.

_Ugh,_ thought Mu Tze. _I may as well get something to eat. Wonder where the nearest restaurant is…._

Passing a Police box, Mu Tze stopped to ask. "Excuse me, officer, would you be able to tell me where the nearest restaurant is?"

"Ah, of course, sir." Said the officer. "The nearest restaurant is Saonji's, which happens to have exquisite Okonomiyaki. Good prices, too. Third street on the left, then it's on the right hand side of the road."

"Thank you, officer. That will be all. Have a good day." Mu Tze replied, bowing before following the directions.

The police officer frowned. It was a warm day, and that Chinese man had been wearing a lot of clothes. He also walked with a certain confidence, and he oozed with hidden power.

He felt like trouble.

Polite, though.

::::::::::::::

The whistling of the kettle alerted the three cursed workers of Saonji's, telling them they could revert to their normal genders. Ranma-chan grabbed the kettle, pouring a bit of hot water over herself, before handing it to Ukyou-kun, who did the same. Before Xian-kun could change back, though, a man came in. Xian caught a site of him, and froze, the colour draining from his face. It didn't go unnoticed.

"Xian, are you OK?" asked Ukyou. "You seem pale."

"Mu Tze…" Xian stammered, unable to get the words through.

"Mousse?" Ranma asked, confused. "Look, I know you two are girls normally, but can you not talk about hair-care in front of me, it makes me feel… weird. I dunno why, it just does."

"No, not mousse, Mu Tze!" Xian-kun whispered. "He from Amazon Village and want marry me. How he find me?"

"Sugar, does he know about your curse?" Ukyou asked.

"No, Mu Tze no know." Xian replied. _Wait, _Xian thought. _Mu Tze doesn't know about my Nannichuan curse… I can hide in plain sight._

Mu Tze sat at the counter, forcing the three to stop talking lest they be overheard. "Uhh, the house special, please?" Mu Tze said politely.

As Ukyou started the meal, Xian started planning his background history. He was from Hong-Kong and was called… Ugh, coming up with fake believable names was hard.

This was touch and go. Xian-kun had to hide in plain site and the smallest slip-up would bring a nuisance back into his life and into the lives of his friends and employers.

* * *

Notes:

CROUCH OF THE FEIRCE TIGER!

I'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRYI'MSORRY FOR BEING LATE!!!

OK, so I've updated Saotome Siblings, posted a rewrite of my first published fic and am finally updating Ranchan and Ucchan. It's been a bit of a delay, I know, but I thought I'd lost my memory stick for a week, which is what a draft of Chapter 20 was on. It's shaped like a pink Volkswagen Beetle, by the way, it's very nice. =]

Nevertheless, I got it back (It was next to the computer, on the floor. (",) Oops.

Reviews.

**Misao2008**: Fast? Not this time. Chapter 19 just happened to be updated when you were online, is all. I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. Don't rush myself? OK.

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Shit+fan=messy. Nothing like that's happened. Yet. =P Ranma and Ukyou have NOT met the Amazons, but I'm planning something for Genma. Cookies to anyone who can work out what may have caused this.

**chm01**: Roasted worm? I don't get the metaphor. OK, creativity block granted, but I still don't get it.

**James Birdsong**: You have a tendency to use one-word reviews. I've noticed this, and it can be a little infuriating. What part do you find Marvellous? That feedback can really help me boost my writing skills, and I would appreciate the feedback.

End of reviews! Wooh!

Now, I'm off to make some food before going off to see the new Star Trek film. My god, it looks good.

Much Love, SOTG.


	21. XX aren't as weak as you think

Hitoshi Onodera sat on the edge of a cliff, high up Mount Fuji. On the insistence of his Phoenix companion, Susan Brown had joined as well, but was being kept out of the mental conversation that the Phoenix had with its summoner.

The subject was Ranma.

_--Onodera, your foe is stronger than you give him credit for.-- _The phoenix said, channelling the thoughts directly into the human's brain. --_His attacks are strong and his defence is as tight as a drum. You will be hard pushed to defeat him. Your only hope is to find a weakness. Otherwise, you and Miss Brown should give up.--_

Onodera growled. "No way in all of the hells will Saotome get the better of me. He doesn't know what I've been through, nobody does. And to mock me – to mock my life – like he did, is unforgivable."

_--So he defeated you in battle. You left the rematch without a clear defeat. By your logic this makes you as bad as Ranma.-- _The phoenix's mouth curled at the edges, giving a beaked smile towards it's summoner.

"He became a girl." Onodera defended. "I can't fight girls. They're—"

A loud crash of utensils from the pitched tents about 20 meters away interrupted Onodera's rant. The sudden remembrance that he'd been travelling with a girl for so long made him swallow his words.

They were definitely not weak, not by a long shot.

"—They're…" Onodera stammered.

_--more than you give them credit for.-- _The phoenix said. _--Never underestimate your enemy. If anything, Saotome would be faster in that form, but not as strong. That's not to mean he'd be any less dangerous.--_

"Yes…" Onodera replied. "No less dangerous…"

But still Onodera couldn't quash the feeling that he'd feel _wrong_ fighting a girl. They were so much more sensitive, regardless of conditioning. What if he kicked her in the breast? Surely that'd hurt.

_--It would, but from what I saw of Saotome, it wouldn't stop him. If anything, it'd spur him on.--_

"Dammit, get out of my head!"

The phoenix chuckled. He raised a flaming wing towards the camp, where the sweet smell of cooked food was wafting over.

"Sorryphoenixgottagofoodison!" Onodera said so fast it was a few seconds before the intelligent bird could decipher the message.

::::::::::::::

Ryouga was lost.

Again.

And it looked like it was going to rain.

"WHERE THE HELL AM I NOW!?" he screamed to the heavens, a sickly green aura forming around him. The aura flowed along his limbs like water, rippling and surging, bubbling around his heart and lungs, calm around the temples and like a waterfall towards his hands, eventually overflowing to the space between them and crashing into a nearby tree.

"Shi-shi hokoudan." He whispered afterwards, acknowledging the attack.

Carefully, he looked at his surroundings. He was well and truly lost. Kodama wasn't with him, as Ryouga had only gone to the restroom and had clearly taken a wrong turn.

He wouldn't get back to the Tendo Dojo till next week, at least… And with no pack, he had no food, no hot water… He was in trouble.

The scenery around him was mountainous, speckled with rocks and pebbles, and some scorch marks as well. Perhaps he was near a high-powered martial artist who could teach him something.

After a bit of careful exploring, he came across a trail that led towards the remains of a camp site. There were several tracks that led into the woods, as well as one that led further up the hill that he had come onto. Walking up with barely any effort, he heard the sounds of activity.

"Susan," he heard someone say. "How's the food?"

"Almost ready, Hitoshi. Have a good talk?" a female voice replied.

"Yeah, I've got things sorted out in my head now." Hitoshi replied. "But if I could get my hands on his neck, I'd kill him!"

"I know you would." Susan replied. "I'd do the same to his little slut of a wife, as well."

_Why does this sound familiar,_ thought Ryouga.

"Curse them… Curse them both!" Hitoshi muttered under his breath. "Just wait, Saotome! I'll get you for all you've done!"

"Saotome?" Ryouga said out loud. They were after Ranma?

He didn't have much time to think about that much more, as he was suddenly surrounded by fire.

"Who's there?" came Hitoshi's voice. "I don't appreciate people sneaking up on me or my companions."

Ryouga looked wildly around at the circle of flames surrounding him. Occasionally, a small lick would reach out and strike him on exposed flesh, turning it red. "My name is Ryouga Hibiki!" Ryouga shouted in fear, despite him wincing at the tone of his voice. He pushed it back down. _Anyone would be scared if a wall of flames appeared around them for no reason!_ He thought angrily. "I heard you mention a Saotome, and I was thinking that perhaps we could help each other!"

The flames died down a bit.

"What makes you think we'd be able to help each other?" Hitoshi's voice came again. "You have no proof that we are after the same person."

Ryouga allowed himself a small smile. "If you're after a Ranma Saotome, strong martial artist and coward, currently living in Nerima and married to Ukyou Kuonji, then we are after the same person."

Hitoshi bristled at the mention of Ranma's name. However, he was no fool and realised that this Hibiki person knew a fair amount about Ranma. What was the phoenix always saying? Know your enemy, wasn't it?

Hitoshi smiled. Susan would be proud of him.

* * *

Notes:

Sorry it's so short. I think I'm coming down with writers block. Not to mention that my exams start in a week monday, so I gotta focus on revision. (Stupid music course making me have to sit theory on a saturday rackin frackin...)

Yeah, anyway.... I'll make the next chapter a bit longer than normal, hopefully. To counterbalance it. Hopefully. I'll try.

Now, reviews.

**Misao2008**: Thank you for the curiosity. I'm wondering as well how this'll turn out. I'm letting the fic write itself a little really, I'm just guiding it along.

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Yeah, shit will happen with Ryu. Anyone noticed what Ryu hasn't? It's there, but you may have to look.

**chm01**: This made me laugh. Genma's fault? How did you come to that conclusion? I'm genuinely interested! Please, tell me!

**Slade2.0**: Two years!? Ugh, I hope that doesn't happen to me. Here's hoping. And thank you for the constructive feedback. It's something that lots of stories lack.

**James Birdsong**: Many thanks to your feedback. To know that my efforts are going recognised is a great relief, and often helps lift my writers block. Hey, if I get enough reviews for THIS chapter, I might get really far really fast!

Why don't you people try it? =p

Well, I'm probably going to go sleep now. It's only ten to midnight, but I'm shattered and I have guests tomorrow.

Until next time, Much Love,

SOTG


	22. Breached quarters, EVERYONE PANIC!

I'm still alive! Don't worry! Read on...

* * *

Detective Inspector Grant Arnolds sighed.

Arnolds leaned back in his office chair, tossing some papers onto his desk, before pulling out a cigarette and lighting it. It had been a long day. First he'd been involved in a hostage situation – on the safer side, thankfully – and had to fill in the necessary paperwork after the criminal made a break for it and was shot dead. Next he'd received a call off his wife, telling him that his son had been hit by a car and was in Accident and Emergency. Now he had received a memo telling him that the Hibiki's had managed to find a way out of their quarters.

Arnolds sighed again. Taking a pull on his cigarette, he took no notice of his higher-ups casting disapproving looks in his direction. They knew what he'd been through today, and they should let him have a little break. Savouring the warm smoke filling his lungs, he took some oxygen in as well to allow the nicotine to flow to his brain, letting it do its job of calming the growing nerves that had built throughout the day.

_Ah, yes. The Hibikis. _He thought. _How did they manage to get out..? Their quarters were meant to be impregnable unless you went through the deadlocked door. And there's still the matter of the youngest._

Arnolds picked up the memo again, reading it for the third time in ten minutes.

*********************************************************************

**New Jersey Police Department**** - ****MEMO**

**TO: Detective Inspector Grant Arnolds**

**FROM: Superintendent Matthew O'Connors**

**SUBJECT: Hibiki case: Breach (URGENT)**

Grant

The Hibiki case has been compromised. The two civilians held in the secure quarters have somehow managed to escape. We're reviewing the surveillance tapes as fast as we can, trying to determine how they got out. I need not remind you how serious this is.

As you know (And I'm only putting this in to follow protocol) the two Hibiki civilians have a tendency to 'get lost.' Whilst we're investigating every possible cause for their atrocious directional sense, they keep insisting it's a spell placed upon their family name, which had been cast several generations ago by the then Emperor of Japan upon one Sasuke Hibiki for failing to defend his principal, the Emperors daughter. The Emperor commissioned a Chinese 'Mage' to place a spell on the family name.

Of course, this is complete and utter bullshit. (This is the original memo. I'm submitting a clean version to the records. Don't be saying anything now.)

We tagged the two civilians with GPS nodes, allowing us to track their wherabouts throughout the globe. To avoid them being lost, they're implanted in the skin in the right shoulder. We're doing a search of the nodes signatures now.

This is all the necessary information for an alert memo. I'll send you updates as they happen via runner.

Have a good day.

Matt

*********************************************************************

Arnolds laughed bitterly at the last line, before reprimanding himself. Matthew wasn't to know. This had been sent to his desk whilst he was outside on the payphone to his wife.

The DI took a final drag on his cigarette before crushing the burning ember into submission in the ashtray. It was time to resume his search for the Lost Hibiki.

:::::::::::::::

"Aah, another day done."

Ranma sat back in the chair in the main room of the small apartment he and Ukyou shared with his father. Ukyou lay on the sofa napping and Genma was currently in his panda form flicking through channels on the television. "Good day, pops?" Ranma asked?

[Not bad, not bad.] the panda wrote on a sign. Flipping it, he showed another message. [Shouldn't you be training?]

"Pops, we just finished work. We need to rest a little." Ranma replied, smiling a little. "We'll be up early tomorrow to train. I need to refine my Air Blade attack and Ukyou's been practicing her multiple strike move a lot. On me." Ranma muttered the last bit a little bitterly. That move hurt like nothing else when he wasn't expecting it. Ukyou always just smiled and said "Anything Goes, Ranchan." whenever he pulled it up.

[That's no excuse, boy.] the new sign that appeared said. [You won't improve if you let yourself slack off.]

"And what have you been doing ever since we got to Nerima, pops?" Ranma replied, grinning. "I haven't seen you running through any katas, let alone spar with me or Ukyou."

[I'll have you know that I've been sparring with Tendo, boy.] the third sign of the exchange said. Flipping it, Genma 'said' [He's been slacking off and I have been bringing him back up to his former level.] Another flip of the sign. [He provides quite the workout.]

Ranma mused over how a sign could have three sides, all with different messages before he realised that his father had been with the Tendo Patriarch. "Have you been planning to marry me and Akane again?"

Even as a panda, Genma couldn't lie to his son. Ranma had spent most of his life on the road with him, and he and Ukyou had worked out when Genma was lying. He always paused and gave a short answer.

Genma lied. [No.]

"Stupid old man. I have no interest in marrying Akane. I can give that in writing, too!"

[Boy, you must honour the agreement between our families!]

"And dishonour the agreement between the families already joined?"

Genma started sweating, cornered. He couldn't win this.

"Stupid panda. You have no sense of honour yourself. How many times did you steal food in the last year of our journey?"

[Two hundred and seventy six times.] Genma signed, a smug look on his panda features. [I counted.]

"Oyaji no Baka…" Ranma muttered under his breath, before pushing a pressure point at the base of the panda's neck to knock him out.

* * *

Notes:

I'm still alive!

Stupid writers block... Stupid exams... Stupid notes... To the reviews!

**TheLordOfPages1692**: The two OC's will play roles later on. They will have another fight, as well. Against who, that's a secret. Hopefully, you enjoy this chapter as well.

**gen x**: Thank you for the review. Short and sweet. I hope you keep reading.

**Misao2008**: Yeah, at least I wrote something. I'm really fighting this writers block, coming up with zany, crazy **mad** new ideas, but they won't mould into the plot. I'm trying to start on something I planned from the start right now, anyway.

**James Birdsong**: Haha. Thank you for taking a sword strike to the writers block. If only it were that easy... it has over 9000 HP. And yes, yes, I'm studying. I still got a few lessons on Music Theory before the exam for it (Which is on a saturday... ¬_¬) and I have a couple of gigs coming up as well. Hectic.

**chm01**: My imagination? I have writers block! My imagination is about as useful as taking a torch to the sun!

That's that. Sorry the chapter is so short, but I just needed to upload. To let people know I haven't died.

Hope you enjoyed!

Much Love, SOTG.

vvv Click to review! vvv


	23. Delusions, deceptions and long roads

"Ranma! We're going to be late!"

Ranma groaned as his wife kept prodding him in the side with her fist very hard. "mm, I'll be up in a second…." He mumbled.

"Ranma, the school is ten minutes away! We have fifteen minutes before the bell rings!" Ukyou shouted, still punching Ranma. It didn't work. "Don't make me get some cold water!"

A blur of motion leapt out of the bed, donned some chinese clothing and grabbed a spare slice of toast lying on the side, before bodily picking up Ukyou and leaping out the window and onto a roof. A few minutes later, Ranma and Ukyou landed in front of the school gate.

"Never let us mention how fast we got to school. I don't wanna be a girl." Ranma muttered loud enough for Ukyou to hear.

"Sorry to disappoint you, Ranchan, but it looks like there's a storm developing." Ukyou said, looking towards the sky. "C'mon, let's get in the school before it starts raining."

Needing no further prompting, the married couple ran towards the school at full speed, just as the heavens opened and a sheet of rain started chasing them. Ukyou yelped as she heard the telltale patter of raindrops on granite, and redoubled her efforts to speed up. She managed to get inside before Ranma did, who managed to get caught by a stray raindrop, more than enough to make the curse take effect. "Aw man," said the red haired girl, before trying to head towards the nearest bathrooms.

"Oh, no you don't. We're NOT holding buckets again, just because you want to be a guy." Ukyou said, grabbing her husband/wifes arm. Ranma-chan sighed in defeat.

"I don't see you as a guy. How come you got it easier?" Ranma-chan replied.

"I'm faster," replied Ukyou. "Now come on, there are going to be two desks in those class that are empty and I don't care what gender fills them."

As if answering some whimsical call of fate, a roof gutter snapped under the sheer driving force of the summer storm that was raging outside, causing a wave of water to fall down in front of the entrance. The splash caught a very surprised brunette, turning her into a soggy brown-haired man.

"I hate Jusenkyo." Ukyou-kun said bitterly.

As Ranma-chan and Ukyou-kun walked in the classroom, they were given a few stares from everyone else. The guys were admiring Ranma-chans figure while the girls were taking in Ukyou-kuns well formed, chiselled body. They then switched their targets of observation, and the levels of jealousy in the air rose dramatically.

Three girls in the class looked at Ranma with more than jealousy, more like spite. Akane, Yuka and Sayuri had still not totally forgiven Ranma for the incident in the hallway all those weeks ago. The carefully hidden comments started flowing between the three girls.

"Ranma's such a jerk." Said Yuka. "I mean, why would you want to be with a girl that turns into a guy? Is Ranma into that sort of thing?"

"Isn't it obvious?" said Sayuri. "They're doing it all ways." This caused Yuka and Akane to blush.

"Don't say that, Sayuri-chan!" Akane said. "As if Ukyou would really do something like that. I mean, sure, Ranma probably would, but he's a guy. It's expected of him, the pervert."

"If only he WAS a pervert, Akane. If he was, he wouldn't have tried to escape me when I made moves on him." Yuka muttered. "I think he's actually quite loyal to Ukyou. It makes me like him even more though."

"Yuka!" Akane nearly shouted, outraged. "If he was loyal, why did he try to get engaged to me when he was already married?" Yuka and Sayuri both frowned. That DID seem a bit perverted. "And he tries covering it up by saying that our fathers arranged it before we were even born. HAH! What a lie."

"Well, did your father go along with it as well?" Sayuri asked.

Akane froze, a little colour draining out of her face. "Well, umm, he probably was convinced by Mr. Saotome to go along with it. He misses our mother terribly, even though it was ten years ago. And, well, you know what men and women do when together…" Akane blushed, a bit of colour returning to her cheeks. "Mr. Saotome probably bribed him with one of those dirty street-walkers from Central Tokyo. Mr. Saotome seems to be there a lot, anyway. I see him coming back really drunk sometimes, battered and bruised, probably from trying to have his way with one of them."

Yuka and Sayuri's faces were paintings of disbelief.

"My father's a lonely man. And Mr. Saotome is hardly worth calling a human being, if he wants to go along and even help in his sons evil plans."

"Akane," said Yuka, "No offence, but have you been taking anything recently? Like, perhaps you're taking the same stuff as the Kunos."

Akane frowned, before thinking about what she said. When she realised, she gasped, holding her hands to her mouth in shock. She sounded exactly like Kuno, just without the poetry and thinly-veiled death threats. "Oh my," she said, still holding her hands to her mouth. "I've said some very improper things. Please forgive me."

Yuka smiled, pulling her into a hug. "It's okay, Akane-chan. We're all still a bit sleepy and our minds run away with us. All is forgiven." Sayuri joined in the hug as well, saying the same thing, but varied.

:::::::::::::::::::

A man and a woman walked a lonely dusty road somewhere in the world. Neither spoke, but the burning passion in their eyes told any strangers that a confrontation could end up with some serious injuries. They both kept walking down the seemingly infinite road, dead straight. They didn't waver from their course for whatever reason. Neither rain, sun, snow or storm slowed their progress, and the fire in their eyes never flickered out of existence.

It was time to go home.

:::::::::::::::::::

Xian Pu tended to Saonji's while her employers were at school. Being foreign, Xian had no need to attend the Japanese schooling system. Not even being on the Chinese birth list, she technically didn't exist in Japan. The only officials who knew she existed were visitors to the Joketsuzoku from the Chinese government to take note of new births and deaths, to be filed and stored in a separate part of the records. An embarrassment to China hidden.

As she tended the grill, serving the late morning customers, she noted a long haired customer come in wearing a white…robe? _Oh no, Mu Tze._ She thought. _How to get away from him?_

Not wanting to have to be a man, sacrificing so much of her beliefs, Xian decided to take her break at that exact moment, putting a small notice on the grill to tell customers that orders will not be taken for about ten minutes.

Ducking into the back, Xian started pacing. Mu Tze wouldn't leave without a completed order. Why else would he be here? Unless he knew that Xian was—

"Sorry, excuse me?" came a voice. "I'm not after food. I was wondering if you could tell me something about the area."

Xian paced faster. That was Mu's voice. What would she do now?

As if to answer her unvoiced question, the tap thought it'd be a great time to turn itself on, full force. The water hitting the porcelain splashed everywhere, including on Xian. Now a man, he looked down at his body, and muttered in mandarin. "^Oh, to the hells with it.^"

Walking out, Xian-kun smiled at Mu Tze. "How can help you?" he asked in broken Japanese.

Mu Tze looked at the waiter and frowned. He looked incredibly familiar. There seemed to be something familiar about the deep purple eyes. Shaking himself out of his thoughts, Mu looked again at the waiter and asked: "Have you seen a chinese girl with long hair around here? About so-high and as beautiful as a goddess. Ring any bells?"

Xian-kun struggled to keep a blush under control. Girl or not, a compliment about looks would always strike a chord with Xian. To be told, even indirectly, that she was beautiful – even by _him_ – was flattering. If only he took this attitude when around her more often.

"I, uhh, no see anyone look like that near here sir. Perhaps other place?" Xian-kun said shakily, making sure to use male speech to minimize suspicion.

This answer seemed to satisfy and disappoint Mu Tze. "Thank you. Never mind, perhaps asking somewhere else will help. Have a good day."

"You too sir, thank you for visit Saonji's." Xian-kun replied, smiling forcefully at the sight of his would-be suitor walking out of the door.

As Mu Tze left, Xian-kun slumped forward, his elbows crashing into the work surface, face buried in his arms. "Too too close…."

* * *

Notes:

Well, after a delay that was longer than it should have been, I've uploaded Chapter 23 of Ranchan And Ucchan. =D

Well, with all this hot weather about, it seems a waste to let it be ignored. So several drinks in the sun and several hangovers the next day (HAH! I wish! I've been playing Assassin's Creed!), I've decided to get my act together and actually bother with the computer. I've been ignoring it. Weird for me.

Nevertheless, onto the reviews.

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Yeah, foreshadowing rocks. I'm obsessed with it. There's still one more plotline I have waiting that's partially set up, too. Yes, relations to Ryouga are alive. Parents? I don't remember saying they were his parents. But, you never know... =p As for animes, I'm following a good few right now. One favourite is To Love Ru, which, whilst a bit girly, is still fun to watch. Ah, Lala's so smart but dim. It's great.

**chm01**: No denying that.

**Sakura Lisel**: Yeah, Soun and Genma ARE idiots. But we all know that, right? Mind you, they're not TOTAL idiots. To survive their pasts, and for one to make secret techniques.... Genma's still going on about it because, even though his sense of honour is so warped it's a Star Trek plot device, he still recognises major possible stains on the white clotho of honour. Nodoka? She should be arriving soon.

**Misao2008**: Thank you. You've been a constant reviewer since you started reviewing thisstory, and it's nice to know that there are people who are bothered about my writing.

**ShineX**: You posted three reviews, so I'll tackle them in order of posting. For chapter one, the curses can actually have a rather suprising effect. If you and your partner sudenly got cursed to change into the respective opposite genders, there'd be very large phychological problems. In this story, Ukyou has not disowned her femininity, so she's proud of her sex. Ranma is as macho as always, and so, as we know, is proud to be a man. Both have suddenly ended up gender-hopping at moments notice, and despite their trust in each other, they're still taken aback by what each others bodies do. Ukyou, for one, already knows what it's like to pitch a tent, and Ranma knows what it's like to be mentally undressed. Both are taken aback.

Chapter 3, I'm assuming you mean Kuno. At first, Kuno hates Ranma for his cockiness, but after the fight, he believes that he used underhand tricks to defeat Furinkan's "Greatest" fighter. He's too dumb to listen to the school rumour-mill, and STILL has not caught on to the fact that Ranma is married and an attempt at an engagement to the Tendo family was tried. But, he may learn soon enough.

Chapter five: That's not really a review.

Now, all that's done, I can go to sleep. Until my next outing, Much Love.

SOTG


	24. Eyes of instinct

"Excuse me,"

The farmer turned around from dealing with his land, to see two travellers, both looking like they were on death's door. _Very tired_, he thought.

"Is there any way you could tell us the way to Tokyo, please?" said the man of the two. "We need to get home."

"Of course, sir, madam." the farmer said. "Just head down that road about 30 kilometres and turn left onto the highway. Follow that to the end and you'll be in Tokyo. By foot, it'll take about a week. Long highway, y'see."

"Thank you, sir." said the woman. "Is there any way we can help you in return?"

"Ah, no, there's no need for that." replied the farmer. "I can manage on my own. I may look old, but I've got a lot left in me, I assure you of that. No, you two get to Tokyo. I'll be fine here, and I'm glad I could help."

"Thank you. We'll be on our way, now." Muttered the man.

:::::::::::::::::::

Ryouga sat on the edge of the camp, as Onodera and the girl Brown sparred. He would have joined in, but from what he could see, they weren't up to his level. And if they wanted to kill Ranma, they'd have a hard job of it. Ryouga watched the two combatants throw punches and kicks that were too slow. If Ryouga could track them with his eye and note several openings that were avaliable without even fighting them, what hope did they have against Ranma?

_How can we attack Ranma?_ thought Ryouga. _He's too good a martial artist to take on ourselves, so what do we do to get him? We can't fight him, so...._ Ryouga groaned. He was a fighter, somebody who needed to get his fists grazed to settle a problem. Coming up with plans were not his department.

_What can we do to defeat Ranma without attacking him directly? Attack indirectly? How? Bribe him? No, that's not good enough. He needs coaxing. What if we kidnap his father? No, he's too good a fighter as well. I could take him, and Onodera and Brown probably could together, but he's apparently very good at running away if all those stories I heard are true._ Ryouga's head started to ache. He needed Kodama, the tree spirit living inside his bamboo umbrella that was still at the Tendo household. Kodama was good at plans.

_Who else? Kidanpping is good, but... His wife?_ Ryouga sighed. He knew that thought was coming. He didn't want to have to do it, but it was ample revenge. Ranma's love for Ryouga's parents. It made sense.

The thought disgusted Ryouga. But honour called.

"Hey, you two!" Ryouga shouted at the sparring pair. "Come here, there's something we have to discuss."

:::::::::::::::::::

Ukyou walked down the street towards the grocers. They were low on supplies, and Genma had decided to start raiding the fridge as soon as he was aware of food in there, which had prompted Ranma and Ukyou to start hiding the food. It wasn't easy, Genma's panda form made it easy for him to sniff it out. The hiding places were quite inventive, sometimes. Like in Ukyou's underclothes drawer, which seemed to act as a ward for Genma, making him start babbling about training and torture.

As the chef walked down the main road, she noted that it was rather empty. To be fair, it was late, and Ukyou was going to the grocers just before they closed. The street was practically deserted. The only signs of life were her own footsteps, the occasional light in a window or shop front and noises from the back alleys that were customary places for the rubbish to go. Bin liners stacked neatly against the walls kept the alley free to walk down.

The noise from one particular alley were louder from another. Curious, and the thought that there could be trouble down the alley, made Ukyou stop and look down it. It was dark, making it hard to see far down, but there certainly seemed to be a struggle comnig from further down.

The phrase that Genma had drummed into her and Ranma's head jumped up; _A Martial Artist should protect those who aren't able to protect themselves._ This in mind, Ukyou decided to head down the alley to find out what was going on.

Ranma sat in the front room of the residential space above their restaurant, next to the open window looking out onto the streeet, enjoying the quiet. The busy day downstairs in the restaurant had taken it's toll, and all Ranma wanted was silence. Blissful silence.

The silence Ranma craved was ripped apart by a blood-curdling scream, causing Ranma to jump. leaning out of the window, he realised the scream was coming from the direction of the grocers. The direction his wife had gone in.

That scream was familiar.

-----------------------

_".....Today, I shall teach you the unbeatable technique......"_

-----------------------

The memory faded out of thought, but it was enough. If that was really what happened, then Ukyou wasn't safe.

With no further thought, Ranma dived out of the window, landing in a roll before coming up on his feet and bursting into a sprint towards the source of the scream. "UKYOU!!"

As Ranma approached the alley, the sound that had haunted eight years of his life drifted out. A low, gutteral sound, like the growl of a savage wild animal.

As two small and bloody creatures ran out, Ranma's face drained of colour.

"C-cats!"

The growling remained in the alley. Slowly, tenderly, Ranma crept forward. His senses were on high alert, listening, looking for and that peculiar sixth sense that everyone Ranma knew seemed to have reaching out, trying to detect any movement. As he crept further into the alley, the pigtailed fighters battle aura flickered into life, illuminating the immediate area. Ranma crept forward still, dreading what he would find.

And there, his worst nightmare, the bane of his memories for most of his life.

The girl he loved, on all fours with empty eyes, the pupils vertical and full of instinct.

The Neko-Ken had reclaimed Ukyou Saotome.

* * *

Notes:

Don't worry! I'm not dead, blind or abandoning this! It'd be something serious before I give up on my writing.

Cliff-hanger? I hope you want to hurt me, or something. Whether for making Ukyou the victim of Genma's training, because you want to know what happens next or because you think of me as that kinda guy, I don't care.

Aaaanyway. The reason I've been unable to update is becasue I recently went on holiday for a week and a bit, and before I went, I wasn't able to upload this chapter due to my internet cutting out the night I got it finished. Real annoying, but I though it'd make my return more sweet, or something. Enough rambling! I've got to be boring you! Review replies? There's a lot! YAAY!

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Yes, Akane has 'grown up!' She's always been this sort of person - quick to jump to conclusions and disbelieving - but when it's someone she can really trust, it's like the mallet turned traitor. Sense gets knocked into her! And as for the travellers, well, they'll be lost for another couple of chapters, I'm afraid.

**chm01**: Yeah, it was a bit of a filler, but it's just a buffer so I can set up the impending doom, really.

**Sakura Lisel**: Nodoka won't be appearing for a while yet, I'm afraid. The plot-bunnies are breeding, and whilst Nodoka SHALL arrive, I need to keep the events of the story within sensible parameters, otherwise I forget what will happen. But how Nodoka will react to see a married couple and not sure if the husband is Ranma? kekekekekeke......

**Slade2.0**: In time, my friend. The seeds are sewn. The mind-numbing fluff shall be soon.

**Enigma-Nemesis**: It's interesting, isn't it? I enjoy fiction like this, where it's the same characters, and the same basic plot, but with such control over the past, as a writer I get the heebie-jeebies, because nearly anything is possible! It's fun to read and fun to write! It's great! And I hope you continue to enjoy reading and reviewing. =]

**boy of anime**: Really? That's really nice to know. You have a lot more faith in stories than I seem to, it must be said. To read this back all those chapters ago, and not really be that interested? I'm glad you've stuck with me, and decided to let me know how it feels to write. It makes me happy. ^.^

**Misao2008**: Pausing your ariting for the summer? Don't blame ya - I'm sweating like... an animal that sweats. Pigs don't so I can't really write that...

**bissek**: Combat umbrellas real? I'm not sure whether to believe this or not... It's one of those things where you have to see it to believe it, I guess. But on the flip side, CONGRATULATIONS on being the person to post the 100'th review! Very well done! Congratulations! Yes.

Eight reviews since the last upload. Eight! Fantastic! I feel like celebrating! In fact, I think I shall by sleeping in my own goddamn bed... The one thing about holidays is that just isn't your bed...

Until next time! (It'll be faster, promise...)

Much Love

SOTG


	25. Recovery

_Two Days Later_

Ukyou sat in the bedroom of the flat she and her husband shared above their shop. Around her were tear-stained tissues and ripped pillowcases and sheets, from crying and anger respectfully. Two days had passed since she'd succumbed to the Neko-Ken, and still she cried. She cried in anger at herself for causing so much trouble to her friends, in pity for causing them worry and fear and in hatred towards her father-in-law. The stupid panda had tried teaching Ranma the technique, but Ranma refused, saying that he didn't think it would work for him. Ukyou had stepped up, saying she would learn it instead, always looking for a way of getting the upper hand on Ranma during their spars.

And so, Genma Saotome, the fat idiot he was, agreed.

Ukyou learnt the technique, and developed the fear of cats that was detailed in the next page of the instruction booklet. The page Genma never read.

That was ten years ago. Ten years of quivering in pure fear whenever she saw a cat. At this thought, a fresh wave of tears came.

On the other side of the door, someone knocked. Quickly drying her eyes, Ukyou stood up and opened the door.

"Hey, Ucchan." Ranma said with a smile on his face. "I thought you might be hungry, so I made you some food. Where do you want to eat?"

"Oh, umm…" Ukyou stammered. "I think I'll eat it in here."

"Ukyou, you haven't left that room for two days, since I bought you out of the Cat-Fist. It's not healthy. All the customers are asking for your Okonomiyaki. There's only so much I can do to sate their hunger. You haven't showered, you haven't gone outside, you just sit in there and cry!"

Ukyou looked at her toes, ashamed. "But…Ranchan…"

"Look, I know yer upset, but we need to pull through. You can't just sit there and bawl your eyes out! You need to get out! You need to wash! Do you realise how much you stink!?"

The moment he said it, Ranma knew that he should have stayed quiet. If there's one thing Genma had told him that was true, it was not to insult a woman on their clothing, hygiene or looks.

"Oh, I stink, do I!?" Ukyou screamed in her sudden anger. "How do you think you'd smell if you'd been rolling around in the trash when not in your right mind!? Jerk!"

As the chef slammed the door in Ranma's face, he sighed before collecting the food and putting it outside the door, before getting some pen and paper and writing a note, folding and leaving it on the tray. "Your food's outside the door, Ucchan. Don't forget to eat it."

As Ranma went down the stairs to prepare for the lunch rush, Ukyou opened the door and took the tray inside. Sitting down to eat her meal, she noticed the piece of paper. Unfolding the note, she read the words written on it in Ranma's sloppy handwriting.

"_If not for yourself, then for me. Please start feeling like yourself soon. Love, Ranma." _Ukyou read aloud.

As she cracked the first smile in two days, she placed the tray in her lap and started to eat.

:::::::::::::::::::

In an empty room of the Tendo household sat a travelling pack. The pack contained clothes, food, a tent and some money. On top of the pack sat a neon orange bamboo umbrella.

However, people with experience of Ki would notice that the umbrella was glowing and emitting a high-pitched whistle. Since different people noticed Ki in different ways, the umbrella glowed to those who saw Ki, whistled to those who heard it and had the distinct smell of fire to those who smelt it.

The umbrella was doing all this to get someone to pick it up. For inside the umbrella was a being. A being that liked to call itself Kodama.

Kodama had been separated from the person who owned the umbrella for a week, and he was getting restless. He still owed wishes to that lost boy, Ryouga. He couldn't do anything until he'd given those wishes. And he REALLY wanted to get them done, so he could go back to his realm.

Kodama kept trying to attract attention. But nobody was watching, or listening, even though the patriarch of the home had gone on many a hunt for the smell of fire.

:::::::::::::::::::

Deep in the dark recesses of a basement, laid a bed, with a desk illuminated with a single candle next to it. Sitting at the desk was a figure. The scratching of a quill on paper interrupted the silence, only stopped when the writer dipped the tip into a pot of ink. While calligraphy was all well and good, there was nothing better than a different writing tool to throw people off the scent.

A few minutes later, the scratching stopped, and the paper was placed inside an envelope. The person stood, retreating from the warmth of the candlelight, before heading up the stairs towards the rest of the home.

As the person headed up the stairs, they spoke so softly that anybody listening would be hard pressed to make out the words. "Soon, you shall know my pain."

:::::::::::::::::::

Xian Pu sat at a table in Saonji's, head nestled in the crook of her arms, desperately fighting off the urge to sleep. The restaurant had closed for the evening, and Xian had been waitressing all day, quickly heading back and forth to the kitchen to make some extra food during the brief lapses in orders. "Mmm, Xian Pu so so tired…"

"I know how you feel, Xian." Said Ranma, who was currently standing behind the counter making a quick meal for the both of them. "You did good today, you know," he said. "If you weren't here, I'd probably be having a nervous breakdown right now. You helped a lot today."

Xian looked up at her employer and smiled wearily. "Thank you Ranma-san. Too-too kind."

"Xian, please, just call me Ranma. We're friends. Enough of the formality." Ranma said, briefly looking up from the cooking Okonomiyaki. "Ukyou feels the same. You've helped us a lot, and it's only fair that we at least treat you like a friend."

"Ranma too too kind," Xian said, slumping down onto the table again. "How the Okonomiyaki coming?"

"It's nearly ready." Ranma said, adding the toppings before dealing it onto a plate and going round to Xian. "Hey, you said Okonomiyaki right! Your Japanese is really improving, Xian. Now, let's dig in!"

Ranma sliced the food in half, nudging half to Xian. As Xian picked up a pair of chopsticks to start eating, she spared a glance at Ranma, and blinked when she saw the pigtailed fighter seemingly breathe his food in before sitting back and burping. "Heh, oops. Sorry 'bout that."

Xian giggled before taking her first bite. "It okay Ranma," she said after swallowing. "It happen to all people. It make me laugh too."

Ranma smiled. "Eat up, Xian. You've had a long day and need to eat before heading home to rest." As he stood up, he went to get a glass of water. "Drink?" he called from the tap.

"Mm." Xian replied in the affirmative. As Ranma came back carrying the two glasses, he was careful to avoid tripping and spilling the water, which, the two friends knew, would find them at the most awkward times. However, Fate wanted to play a game.

One accidental trip-up later and there was a red headed girl and a black haired man staring at each other, dripping wet.

"Ranma no baka!" Xian-kun said suddenly, shaking the excess water out of his hair.

"Oh, Kami, I'm so sorry Xian!" Ranma-chan said, panicking. "I'll get you a towel from upstairs!"

"Ranma, no," Xian-kun interrupted. "It ok. I manage walk home as wet man. I change when get home. Thank you for food. See tomorrow, yes?"

"Uhh, yeah, I'll see you tomorrow, Xian." Ranma-chan replied, walking the taller man to the exit. "Get home safe."

Xian-kun nodded and left towards the street she lived on.

Five minutes later, Xian-kun was hiding in an alley as she stared in fear at the Chinese man walking up and down the street.

Straining her ears, she heard him say: "I could have sworn I saw her up here earlier today…"

As the man kept looking, he looked down the alley, causing Xian-kun to stop breathing lest he give himself away.

Mu Tze looked down the alley. He could have sworn he heard a noise from down there. _Ah, probably just a stray cat_, he told himself.

As he left to continue his search, Xian-kun left the alley and ran as fast he could without making sound towards home. As he turned the corner he stopped to catch his breath. "Stupid Mu Tze! Why you look for Xian Pu! I no want you here!"

* * *

Notes:

I'm BACK!

Sorry for leaving people who give a damn with a cliffhanger over the summer, but I was constantly drunk. One thing I've learnt is that drunken writing is not good for you.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this. I'm just setting up future plotlines and developing characters more so. There should be some more action in a few chapters. I write this as I go, so, who knows when it'll finish. When I want to focus on other things, I guess.

Anyway, to reviews. All two of them.

**chm01**: Yes, indeed. The excrement has collided with the air distributor. And expect vats of it to collide with wind-tunnels in the future.

**TheLordOfPages1692**: Again, sorry for leaving you on a cliffhanger. Did you squeal with exitement when you saw that I've finally updated? I do, for some reason. Meh.

The plotline of the canon you're referring to is when Nabiki and Ranma pretend to be engaged. Akane got upset because Ranma caught Nabiki instead of Akane, arguing that Akane's martial arts training should make it easier to cope with falls, compared to Nabiki's training, which in canon is non-existent. It was a good plotline. I need to dig it up.

Well, that's that. I'm going to be at my computer with MS Word on it more now (I lost it at home, somehow...) so updates to Ranchan and Ucchan will be more frequent, as well as Saotome Siblings. If you haven't read it, click my name at the top of the page and have a gander. I'd greatly appreciate it.

Much Love, SOTG.


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